rainbowtheunicorn Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 I have a really good friend, he is younger than me and we have been flirty for years with one another. We hang out alot since we share the same interests in activities. He is a really good person, good friend and I am attracted to him for sure. But he can also be a very solo kind of guy. He spends alot of time by himself which I also enjoy doing and I think that's why we understand one another so well. We've laughed together and grieved together and along the way we have become very tight friends. Recently in the past few months I have noticed (and so have all our friends) that he has become more agressive in his flirtations. This is after he and his girlfriend had broken up a few months prior. More phone calls, more texts. Texts that suggest a little more than just being friends. More teasing, more silly behavior, sometimes acting like a 6 year old. Classic "I Like You" signs from a guy. Calling me his girl, telling me how lucky he is to have me in his life. And to boot I planned to take a vacation alone (in which he invited himself along) so now we are going together- and everytime I am with him he mentions how excited he is to go and how much fun we are going to have etc. Everything seemed pretty normal. Of course there was a little tension because the flirting got heavier but I just kept telling myself we are friends. Let it happen naturally if it's going to happen at all. A week ago he came over and we had another great night hanging out. He kissed me- but I was so suprised that he made the first move because I never thought he would! That made it kind of awkward but it was still nice as far as i was concerned. It felt really intimate with him, it was definitely not just about hooking up for either of us because it didn't go beyond that kiss. He was really affectionate. When he left he made sure to say he was excited to go on this trip yet again. That was 4 days ago. Since then the text messages have gotten sparse. He hasn't called me but he has texted me everyday at least a few times-except for today. And he always initiates it. Before this kiss happened we would sometimes not talk for a day, two at the most but I never worried.I don't want to chase him or scare him off so I'm just letting it ride. We normally see each other everyday at some point because of the place we live and the activities we do but the weather is bad and so we haven't bumped into each other in the past few days. I don't know what to think. My mind is going crazy trying to figure out if he's all the sudden not interested, changed his mind, freaked out or what. Or if I'm just a crazy girl freaking out over nothing. And I miss him because he is one of my best friends and I don't know what to do!
creighton0123 Posted January 5, 2011 Posted January 5, 2011 "I don't know what to think. My mind is going crazy trying to figure out if he's all the sudden not interested, changed his mind, freaked out or what. Or if I'm just a crazy girl freaking out over nothing. And I miss him because he is one of my best friends and I don't know what to do!" It sounds like he is feeling the exact same way. Speaking from experience, this type of withdrawal tends to arise in introverted/loner types. While extroverts will seek the company of others to discuss problems, introverts will withdraw. Call him and invite him over to dinner. Please let us know if there's any update :-)
Nightsky Posted January 5, 2011 Posted January 5, 2011 Yes, you are more than friends. He might just be afraid of pushing to hard. You said yourself you were surprised he kissed you. He’s probably just as afraid of screwing this up as you are.
carhill Posted January 5, 2011 Posted January 5, 2011 OP, you're friends. Dating 'rules' don't apply. Communicate. This isn't some delicate flower. If you and he are on the same page and the title of that page is 'romance', then that's the page. If not, not. In your friendship is he the sole initiator? If not, go with that. Communicate. When does your vacation begin?
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