whitegeekster Posted December 22, 2010 Posted December 22, 2010 Okay so my girlfriend I were doing perfect(or at least i thought) until last night around 11:30. I had just got done seeing a movie with her and some of our friends (another couple). Before the movie she was very quiet and didn't really make any contact with me. When i got home i was texting her and she basically ended the realationship.....I will post the messages below.I need to know what to do, because i think im in love with her and that she is the one. Thanks ahead of time!!! Tuesday, December 21, 2010 Her Hang on a sec.. 12:01 AM okay 12:01 AM Me Her Mmk you there? 12:13 AM yes 12:13 AM Me Her K what was the question?? 12:14 AM what were you going to tell me? 12:15 AM Me Her Oh yeah. Ok so I care.about you. Therefore I will be honest. Ok? 12:16 AM ok 12:16 AM Me Her Ok. So. Umm ever since.. the beach night or last week. When you kept saying I miss you. It kind of turned off my feelings for you since.you say it...a lot. And 12:25 AM then that night after the beach.. how.you didn't want to leave.. that kind of was too... i mean i understand wanting to hang out and stuff. But the way you did 12:25 AM it kind of showed me how much younger you are than me.. and your really awesome and would much rather talk to you in person.. but I just never seem to find the 12:25 AM right moment.. and that kind of bugs me too.. I've been wanting to tell you but don't because I don't want to hurt you.. so then I just don't say anything.. but 12:25 AM then that doesn't work for me... I just feel bad. And I'm really sorry.. but I really had to tell you how I felt and I hate that its over a computer screen. 12:25 AM ...the reason i did that was because for once in my life i thought i found the right one, I thought you were the answer to all my prayers Eva. 12:32 AM When I wasn't with you it didn't feel right, that is the reason I said it so much. I know i screwed up, and i know 12:32 AM that my apology isn't going to fix anything but I am more than sorry. 12:32 AM Thank you for all the time we spent together... 12:32 AM Me Her And me and Megan talked today. And if we did date.. what would we look forward too? We already do.what couples.would. I mean we do more than Kay and Patrick and 12:33 AM Megan and Brandon. So if we did date we wouldn't be saving anyting.. and that made me kind of sad. Because it seems more a a.friends with benefits thing and da 12:33 AM ting without a title.. so I feel like I'm going behind my parents backs.. and that's not on my to do list.. and thus year my goal was to not date anyone.. or an 12:33 AM ything with a Guy... then you came along. And your really awesome.. but my goal is completely. Like failed.. and and I get really mad at myself for those kinds 12:33 AM of things.. and it makes me upset that people already think we are dating.. even though were supposed to be friends it just shows me that I'm not patient... an 12:33 AM d and a bunch of stuff.. ugh I hate texting this to you 12:33 AM Phoenix I think your taking me the wrong way.. we may be just at the moment I don't think were on the same page.. I don't want to be in a relationship... my par 12:37 AM ents don't allow it and I don't want to go against their backs. You can't blame yourself I was my fault for not bent able to do anything. I was planning on tell 12:37 AM ing you my boundaries a long time ago. But when you told me you were afraid to get hurt, I figured you would have yours too.. but its my fault for not telling y 12:37 AM ou earlier. Please.don't take this out on you. Or anything. Because you didnt do anything 12:38 AM Okay I understand, I starting liking you to fast, I should of slowed down. When you started calling me "babe" I though you were making it more 12:42 AM serious. And when you I said I never want to loose you, and you said I won't... Gah I never expected this :/ Well I'll be waiting http://www.loveforum.net/images/smilies/big/Happy.gif 12:42 AM Me Her I know.. calling you babe was my fault. I just thought it fit. And when I never wanted to lose you. I meant as my friend. You are one of my closest friends that 12:44 AM I can talk to. And I don't want to lose that... 12:44 AM okay, so what do you want me to do? I mean I obviously still like you...and that isn't going to change anytime soon, and you're probably going 12:50 AM to move on, but I promise you, I will be here when you graduate, and your basically the best friend I've ever had... 12:50 AM Me Her Just be my friendhttp://www.loveforum.net/images/smilies/big/Happy.gif and we will see what happens 12:54 AM alright, so start over? 12:54 AM
oczplayer Posted December 22, 2010 Posted December 22, 2010 Turning a friend into a girlfriend is somewhat of a challenge. She's gotten to know you, and views you in a certain light. In order to become romantic, you have to change the way she sees you. In other words, you have to tap into the emotional side of her brain that screams, “I want him!” The following are things you can do to make that happen. These methods aren't fool proof, but if you want to take your friendship to the next level, they're your only shot. Here's what you should do, from start to finish: 1. Don't pour your heart out to her. Most guys who have feelings for a friend are too hesitant to express their feelings, so odds are you haven't done so yet. If you do pour your heart out to her, you'll immediately make the dynamics of your relationship awkward. She'll start acting weird, won't call you as much, and create a distance. In short, just don't go there. So what do you do if you've already worn your heart on your sleeve? Work your hardest at acting casual, as though you really only have friendly feelings towards her. Don't call as much, don't give her longing stares, and remain laid back. You should also focus on the following two tips. 2. Stop letting her walk all over you. When a guy has a crush on his friend, he'll do anything to please her. He generally acts out the role of a boyfriend by taking her out, paying her way, and listening to her on the phone, with one major difference…he gets nothing out of it. Things get really bad when she uses you to discuss her “boy problems.” It doesn't feel fair, because it isn't. It's time for you to draw the line, but do so in a nice way. When she calls, don't pick up, and call her back in a few hours. If she wants to go out, tell her you've got other plans. In fact, it's not a bad idea to let her know in advance that you'll be busy over the next couple of months. Suddenly, you've gone from being taken for granted to being a novelty. A lot of guys have trouble initiating this step. They feel they're being selfish or cruel, but I beg to differ. First, women aren't that blind. She probably knows you have certain affections for her, yet she continues to use you for personal means. To me, that sounds cruel. Second, you must understand that women are drawn to men who have busy lifestyles. If she has to work for your attention, she'll appreciate it all the more once she has it. 3. Date around. The heart always wants what it cannot have, and this is certainly true for women. With that being said, get out there and flirt! Allow her to see you chatting with other females, and if a girl is attractive to you, ask her out. Just because your friend is all you ever think of does not mean you shouldn't experience other women. As soon as she sees you giving your affection to girls other than her, she'll notice. Let her witness your sexual appeal to the opposite sex, and know that it's triggering her mind to see you in a new light. She may or may not come around and act jealous, but believe me…she is.
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