bsilmb Posted December 20, 2010 Posted December 20, 2010 I know there's so much about attraction on this site and around the web, but how's it work in high school. there's gotta be something, I mean, what can I do to get a cute girl. how do I progress things with this girl. saytheres a girl I talk to in class, when do I get a number or ask them out. I also want to get better at holding eye contact and smiling. my friend does this and he gets so many chicks. of course he just doesn't care what others think. I know it's not all looks, but they've got a smal factor. I think I look alright, so how do I get the girls? and how can I tell that a girl is hinting to me to ask he or? thanks all in advance!
jean-luc sisko Posted December 20, 2010 Posted December 20, 2010 In high school, be good looking, play sports, be confident and outgoing, and this will get dates.
JungleLover Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 Dude, if you must ask these many questions about very single aspect of attraction and dating, I am sorry to say but the prognosis doesn't look great. There has to be a certain amount of intuition about this stuff. I usually don't say this but maybe you should invest in one of those dating programs. I don't think this site is helping you. I am not trying to be an a-hole here but I am not seeing that you are getting any of this and maybe the dating program may help or something.
sally4sara Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 Stand out in some manner. Join clubs and sports if you're inclined to them. Develop a skill that you can showcase scholastically. Don't smell awful. Talk to girls. Which ever one giggles the most when you are around would like it if you ask for their phone number. The more symmetrical your facial features are, the better your luck will be. 1
Author bsilmb Posted December 21, 2010 Author Posted December 21, 2010 Dude, if you must ask these many questions about very single aspect of attraction and dating, I am sorry to say but the prognosis doesn't look great. There has to be a certain amount of intuition about this stuff. I usually don't say this but maybe you should invest in one of those dating programs. I don't think this site is helping you. I am not trying to be an a-hole here but I am not seeing that you are getting any of this and maybe the dating program may help or something. haha thank you forthis post. I'm not like totally stupid with girls, I just simply overanalyze and ask too many questions. I won't bother y'all with this stuff anymore. I've definitely learned enough to get some girls, just gotta apply it and get it.
Sith Apprentice Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 Watch this video. All your questions will be answered: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=EDk0M0UnmAw#!
taiko Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 In high school, be good looking, play sports, be confident and outgoing, and this will get dates. Watch this video. All your questions will be answered: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=EDk0M0UnmAw#! I would go with Adam Carolla over Jean Luc Sisko on this one. I was none of the above in high school yet there were the band groupies, yes like American Pie and a few others.
oliviahopkins Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. Most of us cute girls are just like ...well..."not cute" girls on the inside. We are just waiting for you to get the confidence to show us attention. I don't mean rude or lewd attention, but just basic attention. Don't be worried about thinking she's out of your league. Because, in addition to yourself, many other boys/men feel the same way. This works to your advantage....less competition.
sigurpol Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 Two answers... kinda. I never asked anyone out in highschool. Ever. I avoided dances and parties like the plague.. I found no interest in them and had interest in other things and hanging with my friends who shared the same interest. So, normally I would say, just forget about all of that until you're out of highschool. Then again, after highschool I would always be told by people that I became better friends with that I was always some interest to a handful of girls. So, knowing this, I wish I kind of came out of my shell and asked these people out. So, like most people have probably said.. ask them out.
reservoirdog1 Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 (edited) Dan Savage wrote this a few years ago. I always thought it sounded like pretty good advice. (He's gay but this is aimed at straight teenage guys.) You're having a hard time getting girls. That sucks. I remember what it was like when I was a young teenager and wanted boys and couldn't get any. It sucked. But the sad fact is that most young teenage boys are repulsive — that is, they are half-formed works in progress. Girls mature physically more quickly than boys, which means most girls your age already look like young women and they're generally attracted to (slightly) older boys — and there you are, aching for your first girlfriend, but still looking like a short, hairless chimp. But don't despair, HUTB. Your awkward/repulsive stage will pass. In the meantime, here's what you need to do: worry less about getting your young teenage self laid and start thinking about getting your eighteen- or twenty-year-old self laid. Join a gym and get yourself a body that girls will find irresistible, read — read books — so that you'll have something to say to girls (the best way to make girls think you're interesting is to actually be interesting), and get out of the house and do shyt — political shyt, sporty shyt, arty shyt — so that you'll meet different kinds of girls in different kinds of settings and become comfortable talking with them. Some more orders: get a decent haircut and use deodorant and floss your teeth and take regular showers and wear clean clothes. Go online and read about birth control and STIs, and learn enough about female anatomy that you'll be able to find a clitoris in the dark. Masturbate in moderation — no more than ten times a day — and vary your masturbatory routine. I can't emphasize this last point enough. A vagina does not feel like a clenched fist, HUTB, nor does a mouth, an anus, titty-****ing, dry-humping, or e-stim. If you don't want to be sending me another pathetic letter in five years complaining about your inability to come unless you're beating your own meat, HUTB, you will vary your routine now so that you'll be able to respond to different kinds of sexual stimulation once you do start getting the girls. Solid advice, dude. Edited December 21, 2010 by reservoirdog1
Author bsilmb Posted December 21, 2010 Author Posted December 21, 2010 thanks for all the advice y'all! I'm not as shy and dumb with girls as I seem, I just ask a lot of questions. I have some intuition. I've also stopped just blabbing to people about who I like. also something pretty interesting happened today, but it's hard to tell whether it's just flirtiness or these girls actually like me. so we had this dancing party in my hour for the last day before winter break. I'm a sophomore and they are juniors. it's a cool class, thus the dancing. anyway, these to girls, a and b were dancing on a table along with a bunch of other girls. it's only me and two other guys in this class. they were trying to get me to dance a lot of the time. these two girls are good friends and pretty cute. they both have boyfriends from what I know. but anyway, after they were done dancing, girl a asked me to help her off the table. the table is like 3 feet off the ground and wasn't high at all. so I pulled a chair out for her to step on, but she's like "no I need you to hold me to help me down" so I grab her hands then she says "no I need to hold your shoulders" so she grabs my arms and I grabbed her waist and helped her down. she smiled and thanked me. then after some more dancing girl a "needed" my help down again. so I helped, I went to grab her armpit area lol, but I accidentally got her boob. she didn't care, but she added "you don't wanna grab my pits, I'm sweaty" then immediately after, girl b walked over and asked too. I playfully asked "are you sweaty?" she said "I don't know, hope not" and smiled. that seemed interesting to me. so I talk to girl b pretty often, but only girl a sometimes. girl a always seems to be happy to talk to me when we do though. I might think something more of it if one of them were single, but I think their both taken. so what y'all think?
that girl Posted December 22, 2010 Posted December 22, 2010 The girls who were having you pick them up were flirting. It might not mean they are interested though. Sometimes people are just playing. Don't get involved with anyone who has a boyfriend- it is not worth the drama. If you like a girl, try to talk to her alone, not just in class. Like if she's at her locker alone, come up and say hi and start a conversation. Or if you're both leaving school on foot, ask if you can walk her home. You don't even have to live near her, just say you're bored and you'd like to hang out with her a little longer. You don't have to play sports or stand out. You do have to manage to be around girls outside of class. When I was in high school, I did stage crew for the theater department which happened to have a lot more girls than guys. More than one guy joined just to hang out with girls and at least one of them managed to get a girlfriend out of it. You don't have to join any clubs, but if you're mostly hanging out with your guy friends you're not going to have much of a chance to get a girlfriend. Once you've managed to spend some non-class time with a girl, ask if she's like to go out (not hang out, go out) some time and get her number. Saying you like her should get the message across. If she says no, it is going to sting but be a good sport about it (even though it sucks). Otherwise you seem like a jerk. You don't have to keep going out of your way to hang out with her, just don't get pissed off or rude about it.
Author bsilmb Posted December 22, 2010 Author Posted December 22, 2010 The girls who were having you pick them up were flirting. It might not mean they are interested though. Sometimes people are just playing. Don't get involved with anyone who has a boyfriend- it is not worth the drama. If you like a girl, try to talk to her alone, not just in class. Like if she's at her locker alone, come up and say hi and start a conversation. Or if you're both leaving school on foot, ask if you can walk her home. You don't even have to live near her, just say you're bored and you'd like to hang out with her a little longer. You don't have to play sports or stand out. You do have to manage to be around girls outside of class. When I was in high school, I did stage crew for the theater department which happened to have a lot more girls than guys. More than one guy joined just to hang out with girls and at least one of them managed to get a girlfriend out of it. You don't have to join any clubs, but if you're mostly hanging out with your guy friends you're not going to have much of a chance to get a girlfriend. Once you've managed to spend some non-class time with a girl, ask if she's like to go out (not hang out, go out) some time and get her number. Saying you like her should get the message across. If she says no, it is going to sting but be a good sport about it (even though it sucks). Otherwise you seem like a jerk. You don't have to keep going out of your way to hang out with her, just don't get pissed off or rude about it. alright thanks. that's some pretty good stuff
Author bsilmb Posted December 23, 2010 Author Posted December 23, 2010 The girls who were having you pick them up were flirting. It might not mean they are interested though. Sometimes people are just playing. Don't get involved with anyone who has a boyfriend- it is not worth the drama. If you like a girl, try to talk to her alone, not just in class. Like if she's at her locker alone, come up and say hi and start a conversation. Or if you're both leaving school on foot, ask if you can walk her home. You don't even have to live near her, just say you're bored and you'd like to hang out with her a little longer. You don't have to play sports or stand out. You do have to manage to be around girls outside of class. When I was in high school, I did stage crew for the theater department which happened to have a lot more girls than guys. More than one guy joined just to hang out with girls and at least one of them managed to get a girlfriend out of it. You don't have to join any clubs, but if you're mostly hanging out with your guy friends you're not going to have much of a chance to get a girlfriend. Once you've managed to spend some non-class time with a girl, ask if she's like to go out (not hang out, go out) some time and get her number. Saying you like her should get the message across. If she says no, it is going to sting but be a good sport about it (even though it sucks). Otherwise you seem like a jerk. You don't have to keep going out of your way to hang out with her, just don't get pissed off or rude about it. what's your thoughts on one-itis?
that girl Posted December 23, 2010 Posted December 23, 2010 what's your thoughts on one-itis? It depends what you mean by one-itis. If you like a girl and she makes it very clear that she will never date you, you need to move on and stop holding out hope. It is incredibly rare for this to change. If you mean don't see any woman as special and unique, I think this mindset dooms guys to loneliness. If you don't let yourself see someone as special and unique, you're not letting yourself fall in love. If someone breaks you heart, you do need to realize they aren't the one for you but the psycho dating advice out there for men takes it too far. An ex can be a bad choice or someone who is great but not the right one for you- those are healthy ways to look at it. When you start no woman is unique and they're all interchangeable, you've just shot yourself in the foot. There is a balance where you can think someone might be amazing when you're just getting to know them, amazing while you're dating and sometimes even amazing but not for you after they've dumped you.
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