Nikki Sahagin Posted December 20, 2010 Posted December 20, 2010 Basically, i've recently met the first guy i've liked in ages. The first guy that made my heart skip a beat, that i'd make excuses to go and see, that i'd fantasise about etc. But its like after my break up, I don't WANT to act on it at all. I sometimes wonder if something has happened to me...I can feel, but not too deeply. I can be drawn to someone and attracted but I can't fall in love, or feel anything much more deeply. There's a cold voice in my head that says love, desire, even like doesn't last very long and it fizzles out and so because of that, what's the point? But I do like this guy and it would be a shame to waste that feeling well you don't get it often for people.
january2010 Posted January 4, 2011 Posted January 4, 2011 In my experience, it's a self-protection mechanism. We're afraid of getting hurt again and we've convinced ourselves of all the potential negative outcomes, so why bother? Why not dip your toe in the water and just hang out without any expectations and see where it takes you?
xpaperxcutx Posted January 4, 2011 Posted January 4, 2011 January is right, it is a defense mechanism. I often feel the same way, there are guys I find myself being physically attracted to, but none of whom I'm willing to put myself out there for. I always wait for them to make the first move and even then I'm very slow when it comes to reciprocating. The most you can do is approach a guy with no more expectations than just getting to know him. The least you can have happen is that you make a new friend.
bayouboi Posted January 4, 2011 Posted January 4, 2011 Hey Nikki, like you I feel emotionally dead a lot of the time. I think it's great that you actually have some spark left in you. I say go for it, because even if you do and it doesn't work, you've already been dead before. Wish you the best in 2011.
denise_xo Posted January 4, 2011 Posted January 4, 2011 Rather than asking 'what's the point', how about 'what is there to lose'?...
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