jlynnr Posted December 19, 2010 Posted December 19, 2010 Hey everyone, I have been with my boyfriend for nearly two years now. We met online (he lives in the UK, I live in the US). About seven months into our relationship, I got a phone call from his wife and found out he was married (she had found all of our text messages). By this time, I was incredibly in love with him. We were seeing each other at least once a month, and in between we would talk on the phone for hours. I honestly considered him (and still do) my best friend. His relationship with his wife was strained and they fought often. But they never seriously considered divorce. They still slept in the same bed, had sex, and went out together. I found out many upsetting things from his wife and they still greatly haunt me to this day. For example, one of the very first presents he gave me was a beautiful necklace. Turns out, he gave that to his wife five years prior as a wedding gift (she wore it down the aisle). Secondly, they had sex the night before he came to see me one month, telling her how much he would miss her (although he denies that happened). He also texted me just after they had sex. And he would tell her to cuddle him while he was texting me. And he asked her if she could ever leave him in a vulnerable tone, the same tone he used when he asked me the very same question. It’s been well over a year now since I found out. They are now officially divorced (I know this for sure). But I still spend many hours crying over it. I really do love him, and we are so great together. There is no one I enjoy talking to more. But I’m struggling to get over what happened, and I’m beginning to wonder if maybe I should move on. I could really use some advice on this. Feel free to ask any further questions. Thank you. PS. About two months ago he lied to me again. He told me he was going out to lunch with his friend when really he met up with his wife (to discuss their divorce). He said he lied because he didn’t want to upset me. PPS. As of right now I live in the US and he lives in the UK, however what makes the matter even more pressing is that he has a job lined up in the US (very close to me). In about a week he will know if he is getting a visa to live here.
Leandro Posted December 19, 2010 Posted December 19, 2010 I think you should end it. If he lied to you about his wife for so long, you don't know what he could be hiding from you.
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