andie8809 Posted December 19, 2010 Posted December 19, 2010 I'm about to be actually single for the first time in a little over 7 years...once my ex moves out of our/my apartment. I'm pretty clear about what I want and don't want, but I haven't got much experience "dating". I've been in two serious relationships since the age of 17. I feel stupid for asking, but what is "Dating"? Is it a practice in putting yourself in new situations regardless of what the outcome may be? I think I might have a hard time in the next year because I don't know how to deal with rejection very well and I'm a little afraid that the "dating world" is going to be tough on my sensitive nature.
LikeCharlotte Posted December 21, 2010 Posted December 21, 2010 Hello andie. I went back and read some of your other posts and from what I am reading I think it is probably in your best interest to spend a little time alone. From what I can gather you are still living with someone and have recently been interested in someone else at the same time. You also say that you haven't been alone in 7 years. At 24 you should learn to be independent and I do not want to sound harsh but you do not sound like you are doing healthy things. IMHO you shouldn't be sleeping with other people while you are still living with someone. Why couldn't you wait? You lived with that person for a long time. Do you have no respect for him at all? I may be off here because for all I know you had an open relationship. However the time line you describe doesn't sound right. It just sounds rather desperate. Don't be. It is okay to be on your own! Sadly it sounds as if you wanted to be liked so much that you got hooked on the first thing that showed an interest. Just from your story it sounds like you are inexperienced and could do a whole lot better if you took some time to get hold of yourself and look carefully at your choices. I am not one to balk at casual sex but it is not for everyone all the time. It works best when both people are content alone and have no interest in romantic relationships for whatever reason. If you want something real why shouldn't you have it? You seem very anxious to date and I understand that being in a LTR that you are unhappy in will make you eager to move on but you will be better off and happier if you take sometime to reflect and work on you. You have said yourself that there were issues in your last relationship (lies, depression). Don't you want to bring a better you into the next situation you are in? You will find that once you can love yourself and feel strong you will be fine out on the intimidating playing field. Rejection is about how you feel about YOU not what someone else actually thinks. I hope you don't take this the wrong way. I only mean to help. You just sound very much like a girl I know and I gave her the same advise. She did not take it. I am far from an expert on love but I believe a woman should nurture herself first and project love from a healthy heart. Good luck.
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