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why??????

mgene15

By mgene15
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mgene15 Established Member

mgene15

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Why Do I keep thinking that my ex deep down misses me? she broke up with me in september, and been NC for 2 months now!(and I've been dating a new girl for 3 weeks which has been great) why do I think that my ex misses me but won't budge to call...why do I all of a sudden think about her more the last week and check my phone in the morning to see if she called late at night then the other 7 weeks I had been NC?? really upsets me that after 2 months no call or text...egh... why why why? I guess I'm just venting but I have come so far and will not break NC, but I keep asking these why questions....damn... I'm prolly wasting a thread but I feel I have to vent... :mad: sorry guys

Ajax Established Member

Ajax

Posted
Posted

Hey mgene,

 

I think it come down to this: it's hard to accept the fact that since you felt really strongly about someone, and put 100% into the relationship, that they don't feel the same. And it hurts. I still get the feeling that the main reason my ex left was that she started getting too close and paniced. She was afraid to get any closer for fear that she'd be the one to get hurt.

 

Is that the truth? Maybe. Maybe not. It doesn't really matter since the end result is that she's not with me. I go through cycles where I'll be thinking of her constantly for a while and then less for a while. Then repeat cycle. I'm hoping that once we get to 2011 I'll be able to put it all behind me.

homebrew Established Member

homebrew

Posted
Posted

Because a "healthy" person takes time off after a break up to heal. You clearly did not!

 

So let me be the first to welcome you to the "healing process" and Say hello... to the denial Phase! You still have many other phases to go through and have a long rode ahead of you!

 

On a side note:

 

I want to point out that you are being completely selfish and it is unfair of you to "use" someone else in order to avoid dealing with your last relationship.

 

How would you feel if you EX was "using" you the whole time you were dating only to get over someone?

 

Take how you are feeling now... It's pretty awful right? Well that is EXACTLY what you are going to do to the women you are in a relationship with now!

 

Be a man and do the right thing... end it with her until you get "healthy"!

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mgene15 Established Member

mgene15

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lol I felt healed for a bit, it comes and goes homebrew, just more than normal this week for some odd reason, I'm just hoping 2011 will clear it from my head... but it probably won't that's just something I have to deal with.. I have gone NC and killed myself... but It was very beneficial as I'm not in the same stage as 2 months ago.. I can honestly say I'm better than I was... but like GT asked on another post...when does it officially get to the stage of not caring anymore???

BlindRage Established Member

BlindRage

Posted
Posted (edited)

I'm trying to go NC for a long time. It seems though that every time I hit the 3rd day mark during the night I can't help myself but attempt to contact my ex. Its hard, deep down, I wish they still had feelings for me. I wish they missed what we were together and want it back just as much as I do. Let me tell you something though Mgene15... its been four months and buddy, I am completely out of the story by now lol. I can't seem to let it go though. They have absolutely no feelings for me and I'm pretty much suffering in vain and the pain is self-enflicted. I'm just a really emotional person and I can say I hate it!

 

Moral of my story is: don't try to think they still want you back because once it's over its over and they don't have feelings for you anymore. Why else would it have ended if they "loved" you so much.

Edited by BlindRage
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homebrew Established Member

homebrew

Posted
Posted
I'm trying to go NC for a long time. It seems though that every time I hit the 3rd day mark during the night I can't help myself but attempt to contact my ex. Its hard, deep down, I wish they still had feelings for me. I wish they missed what we were together and want it back just as much as I do. Let me tell you something though Mgene15... its been four months and buddy, I am completely out of the story by now lol. I can't seem to let it go though. They have absolutely no feelings for me and I'm pretty much suffering in vain and the pain is self-enflicted. I'm just a really emotional person and I can say I hate it!

 

Blind... Go read my thread called "No Contact for Dummies"... It will help you out greatly!

BlindRage Established Member

BlindRage

Posted
Posted
Blind... Go read my thread called "No Contact for Dummies"... It will help you out greatly!

 

 

I will!!! I need help hahah

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mgene15 Established Member

mgene15

Posted
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Hey mgene,

 

It doesn't really matter since the end result is that she's not with me. I go through cycles where I'll be thinking of her constantly for a while and then less for a while. Then repeat cycle. I'm hoping that once we get to 2011 I'll be able to put it all behind me.

 

 

 

exact same situation for me...

strangeways Established Member

strangeways

Posted
Posted
lol I felt healed for a bit, it comes and goes homebrew, just more than normal this week for some odd reason, I'm just hoping 2011 will clear it from my head... but it probably won't that's just something I have to deal with.. I have gone NC and killed myself... but It was very beneficial as I'm not in the same stage as 2 months ago.. I can honestly say I'm better than I was... but like GT asked on another post...when does it officially get to the stage of not caring anymore???

 

I've been NC for almost 3 months (no attempts at contact from either side). I've been feeling good but the last week I've been missing her and I've had urges to contact which I haven't had for some time and I wonder if she misses me. I just put it down to a cycle, it'll pass and probably repeat again. probably something to do with holidays as well. Ho hum.

SimonSerenade Established Member

SimonSerenade

Posted
Posted

I went through all of this myself, Wondered why I didn't matter after such a great relationship we had together, Wondered why all my love seemed to go to waste, Maybe your thinking about it more now because your with somebody else and I imagine she can't really compare to your ex right now and in return just makes you feel like this, I know if I got with somebody else right now and she came back I'd trade in my current model for one that served me well at one point in my life, It's a horrible thing to say but it's the truth...

 

I think sometime's our mind works in mysterious ways, If only there was an on and off switch to just move on at the drop of a hat =/

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