Outside view needed

[yostie]

This is my first post so sorry if I do or say something that I shouldnt. So I dated this girl for 2 years, we lived together for 6 months of it. Things were great or so I thought. We end up breaking up and that is in sept she moves out. But she still does this wanting to hang out stuff and that goes on till the end of oct. We get in a huge fight and dont talk for a couple days and she just wants space. So I give it to her, she wants to hang out again so mid of Nov we go no a little date/trip and end up in this huge fight again and I get an email from her like I dont ever want to see you, talk to you, I blocked your numbers so dont ever bother texting or calling, and at that point I was like great, I know its over and I can move on. Back in sept I started seeing a councilor to get some things in my life taken care of. So that doesnt even last a week and she is calling and texting. I have a really hard time ignoring her when she does call or text so I generally end up answering. So last night we go out to dinner and then watch a movie and she stays at my place, nothing happens but cuddling and a little kissing, but she will tell me that she loves me and act like we are together when we hang out. Talking today the topic of getting back together came up and she said she didnt want to and I agreed with her, I dont want to get back till I have my life figured out. I said that once my life was figured out that I would try and prove that I was still the man that she feel in love with and she said ok. But this whole this just confuses me, I dont call her or text her, I let her do all of that but I just dont know if there is a better thing to do during this time of getting myself figured out, I love the girl and want to be with her but know I cant now, but am afraid that if I dont talk to her she will just forget about me, but this whole thing is a huge roller coaster ride for me right now. Sorry I know I am not saying a lot any more just looking for some advice. Thanks

[fabio10]

I think you are being very mature and thinking about your situation with an open and clear mind, you realise that your 'own' life is not in order. You must concentrate on yourself and get yourself in a place and a frame of mind that your life will be complete. I know you are afraid that you will lose her but explain the situation to her face to face no drama explain your feelings for her and then explain you need just some time and space to sort eveything out. I dont think you can sort yourself out while being in close contact with her as it will reduce your focus !