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why is it so hard for some to let go of old things?


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Posted

Hey all! Hope you're good!

I have a general question concerning relationships...after talking to my friends and also reading a lot in here...it seems like a lot of people (specially guys) have a big problem with letting the past go...I've read a lot of threads etc that a Gf finds sex/nude videos of her BF's exes even after dating for quite a while..

 

Guys can you please explain this? if you're in a loving relationship, why do you save stuff like that.. I don't have a problem with just normal photos etc, everubody has a past, but nude photos and videos?

 

cheers

Posted

I cant speak in regards to sex tapes. For me it is because it was a past part of my life that involved experiences before I ever met you.

 

Pictures, letters things like that are little snapshots of a previous life that I might look back on fondly. Simply put, they are just keepsake items.

Posted

You're asking several different questions there all mumbled into a single post.

 

I think the reason some people have trouble letting go of the past is because current events and encounters continually drag past experiences back up.

  • Author
Posted

But don't you think it's a bit weird ahving sex tapes etc. with you and someone else if you're in a serious relationship/married??

Would you like your girlfriend to have the same?

I don't get why? I mean obviously your SO won't want you to watch them and if you don't then why keep them?

 

"normal" pics etc i have no problem with but nude??

Posted

Oh I see what you're saying, sorry don't know, doesn't apply to myself. I will bow out.

Posted
But don't you think it's a bit weird ahving sex tapes etc. with you and someone else if you're in a serious relationship/married??

Would you like your girlfriend to have the same?

I don't get why? I mean obviously your SO won't want you to watch them and if you don't then why keep them?

 

"normal" pics etc i have no problem with but nude??

 

your post seems misguided. what's your real question, as it directly relates to you? you'll likely get better feedback by ditching the unnecessary generalities.

  • Author
Posted

ok I will.

So my friend who's now engaged, she and her SO have been together 4 years, she found a file on his computer withnude pictures and sex videos of and with his exes and chics he slept with, I mean come on, wouldn't you delete them when in a comitted relationship??

 

My BF(since 2 years)told me pretty early on he had those kind of tapes, he promised not to look at them while we were together and "if things work out for us" he would delete them..anyway some time after he told me he wanted to spend his life with me etc etc..so I told him if he had gotten rid of those videos and he said " no but I will now"..I waited a couple of weeks and asked again, same answer...next time i asked it was the same and this time i got pissed of and questioned his real commitment, not until then he deleted it all..I do honstly believe he didn't look at anything but why so hard to get rid of???

Posted

Maybe they want to write a book someday ... or pull a Monica Lewinsky (with the dress) ...:):):)

Posted

Maybe it's like a trophy.

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