Gypsie Posted December 15, 2010 Posted December 15, 2010 My boyfriend and I live together. Things are going pretty good but... Whenever I want him to come out and hang out with my friends and I, he never does. He seems uncomfortable with meeting and hanging out with other people in my life. He wouldn't have to come out every single time but it would be nice if he did, every now and then. That doesn't stop me from going out on my own and having fun with my friends but at least. The boyfriend likes that I do and encourages it which is cool. Still would like it if he would join us from time to time. Don't force him though. On the flip side. I will go out with him and he's friends most the time and make the effort to get to know them. .
reservoirdog1 Posted December 15, 2010 Posted December 15, 2010 What has he said about this issue when you've talked to him about it? I don't mean when you've asked him on various occasions to go out with you and your friends. I mean, what has he said when you've sat him down and said "I'd really like it if you came out more with me and my friends, but you usually don't seem interested. What can we do to fix this?" (If you've never sat him down and had a discussion about the issue, then that should be your first step. Because if you don't, you know what'll happen? Nothing.)
Template Posted December 15, 2010 Posted December 15, 2010 From experience, I've personally never wanted to hang out or even meet my ex's friends. During the courtship, I've often told her that I wanted to meet her friends, as I feel the people in our lives help to shape who we are. However, she would always retort, "well many of my friends already told me, if you get a new boyfriend I'm never going to like him or accept him." So for me, it eventually got to the point of - why do i ever want to meet them if they'll never going to accept me, why force me into an uncomfortable situation? On the flip side, she wanted to meet my friends, and my friends wanted to meet her, and they genuinely liked and accepted her: until we broke up (one for her reasons - because I didn't want to meet her friends) Obviously this may not apply to you, or some may. However, it's important that you do communicate about it, and come to a beneficial compromise.
Lauriebell82 Posted December 15, 2010 Posted December 15, 2010 My boyfriend and I live together. Things are going pretty good but... Whenever I want him to come out and hang out with my friends and I, he never does. He seems uncomfortable with meeting and hanging out with other people in my life. He wouldn't have to come out every single time but it would be nice if he did, every now and then. That doesn't stop me from going out on my own and having fun with my friends but at least. The boyfriend likes that I do and encourages it which is cool. Still would like it if he would join us from time to time. Don't force him though. On the flip side. I will go out with him and he's friends most the time and make the effort to get to know them. . Well, have you asked him why he doesn't want to hang out with you and your friends? We could all take guesses as to why, but he is the only person who knows. Is it just restricted to your friends? Or is he uncomfortable with spending time with you and your family as well?
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