Joe Normal Posted December 15, 2010 Posted December 15, 2010 I'm in a situation where things are very good in my relationship with my girlfriend, being going a little over a year now, with just one big problem - we don't get to meet enough (about once a week). She started studying on a degree course, and also works part-time to cover her bills, so she hardly has any time during the week. It's not just me, her friends have also mentioned that she is hardly coming out. I understand why she is doing it, since she wants to get qualified in a field she is passionate about, and get a good job instead of working at things she dislikes (for less income too). I would do the same in her shoes. We've talked about it and how it is putting pressure on things because we can't meet much. It means that all the normal things you can do in a relationship, become difficult - just things like going out, spending time together, relaxing and having fun. In a way, it's similar to the problems of a long-distance relationship. There's about another 2 1/2 years to go on her course, and to be honest I don't know if I can wait that long for the situation to get better. It's already affected my feelings about us in the last few months, so I can't imagine it's going to improve in a year let alone 2 or so. It just seems like there is a direct conflict between her life & career goals, and our relationship. Also, she is not the only one - I moved country partly to live in the same city as her (also for my own reasons, so I didn't feel I was making a 'sacrifice' to do this), and independently of all this, I am feeling like moving back out maybe in 6-12 months for my own reasons (career, being closer to friends & family etc). So in a way I seem to have the opposite to most relationship problems I see people talk about here and in real life. I have no complaints about my girlfriend, and always have a good time when we are together - the problem is we are not together very much! And it seems like our life paths are pushing us further away rather than closer together. Any suggestions here? I would be willing to bear some time with this kind of frustration, if I saw longer term that the obstacle would be surmounted, but I just don't see waiting 2-3 years as an option, I am pretty sure I'd get annoyed and quit before then. Also I don't really want to stay where I am, and I am not a fan of long distance. Do I just have to accept that these conflicts mean the relationship can't work, or is there another solution anyone can think of? Perhaps someone else has been in a similar situation and worked things out? If there is a way around it, I would love to know!
Author Joe Normal Posted January 1, 2011 Author Posted January 1, 2011 Quick bump - anyone got any ideas?
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