Imajerk17 Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 (edited) your number and then not take nor return the guy's call? I met a girl at the bookstore during lunch last Monday. We were both on our way out. I asked her what she was reading and she replied enthusiastically. She then asked what I was reading. I was walking to a sandwich shop nearby and I asked her if she wanted to join me for lunch. She said she'd love to but she had to get back to work because she had a meeting in 15 minutes. I asked, maybe some other time. She enthusiastically gave me her number. I dialed hers so that she had mine, and indeed my number showed up on her phone so I know that the number is right. I called her the next night--last Tuesday evening, about 30 hours after we met. I left her a brief, upbeat message. No call back though. I then texted her on Friday about getting lunch. No response back. The thing is, this sort of thing has happened to me before. I think I can tell the difference between a woman being "polite" versus being interested and she seemed interested. What do you think is going through her mind? I'd be especially interested to hear what the women have to say. Edited December 14, 2010 by Imajerk17
GG67 Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 Well, I'm a guy, but here's my 2 cents.. She didn't take your call or return your text, because "the thrill was gone" for her already. She loved the attention, as most girls do, which is why she was enthusiastic. But, after you exchanged numbers and parted ways, she was faced with.. talking to you on the phone.. going on a date with you.. getting to know you.. putting in some effort. There was no more thrill for her.
Author Imajerk17 Posted December 14, 2010 Author Posted December 14, 2010 Hmmm.... maybe. Maybe Women Really Are Crazy.
Author Imajerk17 Posted December 14, 2010 Author Posted December 14, 2010 Any females want to chime in? (When I said women are crazy, I didn't mean you! )
runner Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 she's contemplating what to tell her boyfriend but in the grand scheme of things, who cares ? move on...c'est la vie. it was fun. and it will be fun the next time. you will drive yourself bonkers trying to figure this out- with no reward in the end.
ConflictedGuy27 Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 general rule of thumb: sit on a new number for at least a few days (if not a week) before acting on anything. to do so sooner likely comes off a bit desperate, mate. minimally it appears as though you've got close to no other options. specific cases may vary, but generally, slow playing is always the way to go.
GG67 Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 Yeah, she's a total stranger to you. Let's keep her that way. Why beat yourself up over it, building a false sense of 'knowing' her? You're wasting your energy and emotions and time on a total stranger.
Seamless74 Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 Dude great job grabbing your nuts and approaching and getting the number, but think your lookin at it the wrong way.. Do what you did about 10 more times and you got yourself a girlfriend. Dont spend too much time thinking what you did wrong or why she didnt call back no one knows just talk to the next pretty girl you want to.
Author Imajerk17 Posted December 14, 2010 Author Posted December 14, 2010 I agree with the "total stranger" part. The thing is that it has happened a lot before. Get a girl's number and then she won't take/return calls. When you notice a pattern, you do want to figure it out.
Seamless74 Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 look man are you "getting the number" or is she "giving it to you" ?? big difference.
Author Imajerk17 Posted December 14, 2010 Author Posted December 14, 2010 look man are you "getting the number" or is she "giving it to you" ?? big difference. I get what you are saying, seamless. I am well aware of women giving out their number to be "nice" and avoid a confrontation. I asked and she enthusiastically gave it to me.
Seamless74 Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 totally then im sure your familiar with a girl "enthusiastically giving out her number and flaking" enthusiasm doesnt mean anything either.. u know what i mean? its almost like when you asked for her to go to lunch with you on an "instant date" (which was awesome by the way) and if you were to just have said "well ok bummer I was really hoping to get to know you a bit" and walked off. Do you think she would have been mad? Like, "why the hell didnt that guy ask me for my number Im gonna go back to the office and pout all day." Unless she gave you signals she wanted to "give" you her number before you "asked" for her number chances are 85% its gonna be a flake.. Did you ask her relationship situation at some point in the conversation? Does she know why you wanted her number? Tell you the truth after she declined on the lunch i woulda just let it go and see if she would have suggested a meetup at another time.. If she did and "gave" you her number and you posted that question of the forum that would have been a lot harder to figure out... But at the same time why would you want too... NEXT But im applauding your efforts totally I wanna make that real clear.
Feelin Frisky Posted December 14, 2010 Posted December 14, 2010 People aren't always what they seem. Sometimes they have second thoughts--sometimes they have self recrimations--sometimes they're bi-polar, some times they have identity issues like boderline personality disorder. I would just chalk it off to how things are and consider it her loss of the perfect male.
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