Author OOReeee Posted December 15, 2010 Author Posted December 15, 2010 I hate being disappointed like that, and even worse, I hate when someone I care about wouldn't do what I would clearly do if it was the other way around. ugh.
daphne Posted December 16, 2010 Posted December 16, 2010 I hate being disappointed like that, and even worse, I hate when someone I care about wouldn't do what I would clearly do if it was the other way around. ugh. If you expect people to be able to read your mind and do as you would do, you will be in for a very disappointing relationship future. Especially with this girl. Either communicate with her or go about your business. I've had to have this conversation with a friend of mine who got really bent out of shape that I couldn't leave work to make it to an important event he had. He acted like a brat like your girl (except he was in his 40's I think) and I told him that he didn't even give me a chance to properly explain. He finally came around but after we had the talk, I was done. He's too old to not know better. Your girl sounds like she doesn't know better yet. But even if she doesn't tone it down for you, telling her might make a mental note in her head if you end up quitting the relationship so she'll know not to do it again to someone else.
Kowaco Posted December 24, 2010 Posted December 24, 2010 I would give it another shot, but I understand. She may have just reacted to something. It is a red flag
forrest Posted December 24, 2010 Posted December 24, 2010 *update* She texted me yesterday, never apologized or anything but we were able to have a normal conversation for the most part. I was out with my friend who came in for the night and she was in class. When her class ended she said she's heading home and I am welcome to come. I said okay and showed up to her already in bed. I think I should have said I'll stay home but I kinda wanted to get this thing over with. Anyway, she was half asleep, we talked a little, and she was distant as she ever was. I felt like I wasn't there and neither was she. There was almost no instant or recollection of what we had only a few days before. I was upset and wanted to go home but it was late and snowing and freezing so I decided to stay. Throughout the night she kinda got closer but not too much, and I could barely sleep (and had 3 nightmares, but that's a different story). Waking up in the morning wasn't the same either. I think that both of us just kind of got on each other's nerves, after being together for about a month straight, it was bound to happen, and we are phasing out of the honeymoon stage. The question is, what to do now? I still like her, although I am concerned with her unfair and passive aggressive behavior and afraid it will get worse. We are very compatible and in days unlike the last 3, we got along great. I enjoy having her in my life but I don't want to chase her, I've done that before, but I'm afraid that either chasing her or somewhat ignoring her or not paying as much attention as I did before would keep her away for me. you're kidding right? phasing out of the honeymoon period after only a month? That just seems really short to me. Also, (although I don't know all the details) I find it off putting that she didn't volunteer to help you get better when you first got sick (I.E. get you medicine or make you soup). Yes, the relationship is short, but a kind heart would have offered regardless.
Els Posted December 24, 2010 Posted December 24, 2010 The girl is being selfish. I totally understand her disappointment that he couldn't be there, but her irritation should be at his flu/sickness germs, not him. Precisely. It's human nature to be disappointed, but self-control is what we have brains capable of logical reasoning for.
zengirl Posted December 24, 2010 Posted December 24, 2010 You were sick. You expressed your desire to go, and even seemed to say you WOULD go, and she said it was fine that you didn't. Yes, it was important to her, but your health is important, too. You didn't do anything wrong. You did everything right. If she doesn't appreciate it, that's just her being wrong.
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