ces1186 Posted December 8, 2010 Posted December 8, 2010 I am apologizing now for the length of this story. Over 4 years ago I met this guy at work. I never really thought of him as anything at first but after working with him after a couple of months we became genuinely good friends. We were both with other people at the time we met but our relationships weren't the greatest. We both helped each other get out of these relationships since it wasn't working at all. He has always been there for me ever since we became friends and so was I for him. He's always helped me out specially since I am only a 24 yr. old single mom and when I left my ex it was very hard to restart my life all over again. We started becoming intimate over a year ago but we decided to just stay friends as we are both not ready to get into a full time relationship. We agreed that we are not going to sleep or date other people. If we do or did then we would end our arrangement. Things were great the whole time. We’ve met each other’s friends and he told me his friends like me. His family knows about me and have been asking if we are dating because we talk all the time. He’s only met my daughter once as I do not want to fully introduce her to him unless it is something official but he has been buying her gifts on her birthdays and during the holidays. He has never treated me like **** although there are times when we won’t talk for days and I would wonder why. We’ve spent weekends up north together with his friends or my friends. We’ve never fought and the biggest argument we had was due to wrong driving directions. He would always call during his breaks when he is at work and I’m at home and would still call before going to bed. The past few months I feel like I want something more from him but I wasn’t too sure. I’ve been thinking if maybe we should stop for awhile to see things clearly but I know I’m not ready to be in a serious relationship since I’m still trying to get my life together again but he’s been on my brain all the time. We then decided to go away for a one week vacation to Cuba for our birthdays. We both told our parents that we are going away with other people but really it is just us 2. I told him I am nervous since it is just the 2 of us and because we are not together really he might want to have some other fun there. He assured me he doesn’t want anybody else there. So we went and we had the most amazing time. He kept on telling how he is really happy to be with me there and how it is the best vacation and birthday of his life. We both saw a different side of us and became fully open to each other. He then asked if I see myself with him, I told him yes but I don’t think it is the right time. He said totally sees himself with me but it is not the right time for him as well and he knows it would be an issue for his one side of the family to be with me because I am not Italian (I am Filipino) which he mentioned to me from the before. He told me how his mom had to go through a very difficult time because she was Irish and his family from his father’s side (Italian) gave his mom actual bloody cow bones as a wedding gift on his parents’ wedding day. He said he’s not too sure if he’s ready to fight his family for me yet. He also said that if we do become official, he thinks that would be it for him. He also explained the days when he wouldn’t call for awhile was because he’s pulling back because he feels like he’s becoming dependent on me. So we came home from our vacation closer than ever. Last week he called me and he sounds like he is panicking. He said he doesn’t know what to do anymore because he’s not ready but he wants to be with me. He feels like I will be ready before him and I am not going to wait for him. I told him I am not ready and we’ll wait it out. He said he doesn’t want to regret not being with me in the future just because he didn’t take the opportunity now. Everything’s great after that and he took me out for breakfast Sunday morning. Sunday evening he called me and told me his parents found our vacation album and was very upset that he’s lying about us. He said it’s becoming hard for him because everyone’s questioning him and this is the kind of thing he’s not ready to deal with his family yet. He said now he’s really thinking if we should really try and take it all the way or to stop. We both agreed we can’t be friends if we stopped because we don’t want to hear about each other’s dating life which would be painful. I was telling him just in case we decided to stop, if he still want to be friends after a few months or need me I’ll always be there. He then suddenly told me he needs to call me back and I can tell his voice is cracking up (I don’t know if he is about to cry). He told me he will call the next day but he didn’t so I emailed him at work. He told me his mom and sister are asking for a group picture of us that went to Cuba and obviously he can’t pull that off since it’s just us 2 and that his parents are mad at him. He said he needs some time to think and fix things. He said to give him a few days and he will contact me when he is ready to talk again. I felt hurt so I emailed him to not take too long because if we are not talking I want it to be because we have made a decision, maybe it’s time to decide. I haven’t tried to contact him to give him space but I don’t know if it’s becoming too hard for him and he might give up. I don’t want to give up yet although I am not ready for a full time relationship. He emailed my friend saying he doesn’t know what he wants in terms of relationship right now but he knows he is not ready to be in it full time too but he really likes me and doesn’t want to hurt me. I am dying waiting for his call and his decision. I really miss him. I just hope he doesn’t give up yet. I am hoping he doesn’t wait until the holidays are over to talk to me about us. I need your guys’ opinion. Thanks for taking the time to read this.
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