OldSkool Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Ow you are that grandpa from the other thread. Another attack. Now you are resorting to ageism. My friend, I am done with you. It's obvious that your problems with women, I can not rectify. My heart hurts for your jaded, lost, miserable soul. You can spew whatever hate you want. I'm out. Peace.
elaina Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 I don't give a rat's what some cocky jerk has to say to me about women. Any guy above the age of 15 knows the majority of women are attracted to jerks, that is no excuse to be one. I don't act like a gentleman to turn women on, it's who I am and it's how I want to treat them. And most importantly, it's how they should be treated. If my acting like a gentleman turns them off, I'd say being dumped by them would be a good thing. Wow!!! Like StarGazer and KissandMakeUp said, Awesome and well said! (and you're not even looking for women's approval with this! You are a true MAN.)
Woggle Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Yes men should be gentlemen regardless but don't you think that women should also stop rewarding the worst kind of men? Do they share any blame at all.
Mad Max Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Yes men should be gentlemen regardless but don't you think that women should also stop rewarding the worst kind of men? Do they share any blame at all. They won't take blame, but you can't blame men that decide they've had enough. If being nice worked over being a jerk, more guys would be nice.
elaina Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 I often use LS as a mirror of reflection regarding how things have worked out. Hello Carhill It is a good place for that, and for learning how others think. No prejudice. I think, for some men, being a gentleman works out for them; I do not understand though this idea about it working out for them or not. For people who take a firm stand in what they believe is right, it doesn't matter if something goes well or if they get hurt for it. I guess, to me being a gentleman (and a lady) is being a person of integrity who treats others with kindness and respect and consideration. It doesn't matter if a person spits in a gentleman or lady's face. A gentleman cannot force a stranger to be a gentleman or lady back. A gentleman, however, can control his reaction to a non gentleman or a woman who is not acting like a lady, you know? IOW, for them, their natural behavior patterns are found attractive and accepted by society and those whom look to them as potential romantic partners. For others, myself being one example, it's been a long and relatively lonely road. I am sorry that it has been a long and lonely road for you. That does make it harder, I understand that. That road doesn't change who I am, but I do reflect upon it realistically. Perhaps when you're in your 50's, you will reflect back on life and assess how it has worked out; how choices and convictions have transited the passage of time and experience. Perhaps I will. Even though I'm in my 30's, I have often reflected back on my life, but I have never regretted being a lady. Now, there are definitely sad to say times I have NOT behaved like a lady, and I do regret those times and am ashamed of when I have hurt others. The good news is a gentleman on such a perhaps less-traveled path can enjoy the love of others; people who find value in a style perhaps rooted in times gone by. I've been blessed in that regard, having a wide family of friends all over the world. It's been a good life. That's great that you have a wide family of friends all over the world. By the way, though you might not admit it by how you responded to me, I can tell the gentlemanly side of you and I very much respect you for it. These aspects of life have been on my mind more in the last couple months since my mom died as I settled her estate and reflected back upon her life and long marriage to my father. Combined with reading LS, a lot of clarity has resulted. I am very sorry about your Mom. Best wishes Best wishes to you too, and thanks for your reply
elaina Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 (edited) Yes men should be gentlemen regardless but don't you think that women should also stop rewarding the worst kind of men? Do they share any blame at all. Yeah women should stop rewarding the worst kind of men I agree. Women also should concentrate more on being ladies than on seeking guys' approval or even relationships with a specific guy too. (That's way easier said than done though!) I don't know about blaming anybody or anything. It is really hard to treat people in a gentlemanly or ladylike way when they are not doing the same. I think maybe it is just easy for people to concentrate on outward appearances and emotional and physical feelings and the yumminess of sex than to see past character issues and how he/she treats people, maybe? Edited December 9, 2010 by elaina
TheBigQuestion Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 A person should act in a manner which is consistent with his or her own sense of human decency. It's not behavior that (at least ideally) is validated by reactions you receive from others. If I politely ask a woman out on a date and she tells me to f*** off and die, it sucks for her that she feels a need to be rude. Why on earth should how some stranger responds to me change my outlooks on life? I've been rejected, rudely at times, and while it CAN sting, I feel like most people with half-decent coping skills will realize what I'm trying to say. I've also been hurt in relationship situations. How is it that I haven't yet turned into a Leykis type character? It's not like I'm great at letting things roll off my back or anything. Again, I feel like threads like these just fall into the endless "nice guy"/"jerk" dichotomy that has festered for years on this board. The only thing that can really be said about that discussion and any of its variants is that most self-professed nice guys never take proactive steps to improve their lot in life, and all have a tendency to point the finger at everyone (i.e. women and guys who are good with women) as opposed to themselves.
SteveC80 Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Its a tough spot for a women,while she wants an nice guy who will treat her right and provide for her things likw power strength and dominance are what turns her on sexually from a raw hardwired standpoint
theBrokenMuse Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 If being nice worked over being a jerk, more guys would be nice. If people are only nice because they think there is something in it for them to behave in that fashion, chances are they aren't actually nice people to begin with. Just Sayin'
Chicago_Guy Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 One of the divorces was because his wife cheated on him. On his show he talked about how his ex-wives leeched off him and made awful wives. The fact that he has been married so many times actually gives him credibility because he obviously know what he is talking about when he constantly talks about how men should never marry. Im very glad that I learn this very early in my life. He does give some decent advice. However, you need to bear in mind that Leykis is an extremely fat and overall unattractive man. He probably attracts women primarily because he has money and is famous, so it stands to reason that a certain percentage of the women who would go for him are the gold-digger type.
Author musemaj11 Posted December 9, 2010 Author Posted December 9, 2010 I don't give a rat's what some cocky jerk has to say to me about women. Any guy above the age of 15 knows the majority of women are attracted to jerks, that is no excuse to be one. I don't act like a gentleman to turn women on, it's who I am and it's how I want to treat them. And most importantly, it's how they should be treated. If my acting like a gentleman turns them off, I'd say being dumped by them would be a good thing. Stockholm Syndrome Masochism If you take pleasure in others taking advantage of you then all the power to you. Its just not my cup of tea. Been there done that. To each his own I guess ... Its a tough spot for a women No its not. Its called "you cant have it all". Women also should concentrate more on being ladies than on seeking guys' approval or even relationships with a specific guy too. Ya except what is being a 'Lady'? What is that even mean? Does that mean obeying men and never talk back to men, etc? Or does that just mean sitting pretty and do nothing? You see, today, a gentleman still has the same expectations as it was 300 years ago. However, the expectations for a lady no longer really exist. and you're not even looking for women's approval with this! You are a true MAN When a woman says, "You are a real man!" It means, "You are such a good slave."
theBrokenMuse Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Stockholm Syndrome Stop flippantly throwing around the term stockholm syndrome as though it's even mildly applicable. The disorder is extremely serious and certainly does not need to be bastardized and trivialized by people who want to use it for their own emo agendas in order to draw victim cards. Sorry but if you want to claim society has victimized the entire male population then you are going to have to grant the same victim status to females as well for similar reasons and now that every person holds that same exact card, it becomes as useless and unplayable as if you didn't have one in the first place. Congratulations.
Woggle Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 If people are only nice because they think there is something in it for them to behave in that fashion, chances are they aren't actually nice people to begin with. Just Sayin' True but anybody who is a good person only have their kindness turned around and used against them will eventually get sick and tired of it. People tend to do what produces the best reward.
theBrokenMuse Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Stockholm Syndrome Stop flippantly throwing around the term stockholm syndrome as though it's even mildly applicable. The disorder is extremely serious and certainly does not need to be bastardized and trivialized by people who want to use it for their own emo agendas in order to draw victim cards. Sorry but if you want to claim society has victimized the entire male population then you are going to have to grant the same victim status to females as well for similar reasons and now that every person holds that same exact card, it becomes as useless and unplayable as if you didn't have one in the first place. Congratulations.
theBrokenMuse Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 True but anybody who is a good person only have their kindness turned around and used against them will eventually get sick and tired of it. People tend to do what produces the best reward. If one becomes capable of turning their backs on their own principles in order to better secure an emotional payoff then it stands to reason that they are capable of nearly anything. They have already shown that their integrity carries a price tag and imo, that tag is not nearly hefty enough. I will come out and admit that I really have to struggle to try and understand such things. I have always been unyielding in my principles and I have extreme trouble grasping the thought process involved in doing the opposite.
Woggle Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 I don't compromise my values. I have snapped a few times but for the most part I show basic civility to everyone though I don't go the extra mile until a person earns my trust. That being said I understand those who get fed up with a world that rewards selfishness and says the hell with it.
theBrokenMuse Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 That being said I understand those who get fed up with a world that rewards selfishness and says the hell with it.Yes, the world is cold, unfair and quite cruel... in essence it can really suck but that does not mean we should aspire to do the same. I commend every man and woman who lives their lives with dignity, integrity and holds true to their values. Perhaps I am just having a rare moment of idealism here but I honestly can't help but to believe if more people did that, this world would be a better place in which to live.
AlektraClementine Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Yes men should be gentlemen regardless but don't you think that women should also stop rewarding the worst kind of men? Do they share any blame at all. It's not logical to expect a certain gender/race/creed to do what an individual thinks they should do. The craziest thing I see happening here is the idea that one man is trying to teach a lesson to all of the crappy women out there instead of focusing on finding 1 good woman. His ultimate goal is to shame and correct an entire culture of b**ches. In the meantime, he's blinding himself to all of the good that can be found in the the love of one great woman. Blame and unaccountability for oneself seem to me, to be the cancer of a lifetime of continued enlightenment.
Pyro Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Yes, the world is cold, unfair and quite cruel... in essence it can really suck but that does not mean we should aspire to do the same. those who aspire to be that way do so because its easier and more convenient to do so rather then to stop and evaluate themselves and figure out what they can do differently and then apply it.
Mme. Chaucer Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Stop flippantly throwing around the term stockholm syndrome as though it's even mildly applicable. The disorder is extremely serious and certainly does not need to be bastardized and trivialized by people who want to use it for their own emo agendas in order to draw victim cards. Sorry but if you want to claim society has victimized the entire male population then you are going to have to grant the same victim status to females as well for similar reasons and now that every person holds that same exact card, it becomes as useless and unplayable as if you didn't have one in the first place. Congratulations. Thank you. I am happy to report that there is an entire strata of American culture where people of any gender are trying to be the best person they can be; trying to treat other humans (of whatever gender) with respect and kindness. The more people who can try to live like this, the more elevated our society will become. The more hating that is embraced ... you know. I had family members who survived some of the most atrocious behavior humans have inflicted upon others in history (Nazi concentration camps); I have aquaintances who experienced hell in Vietnam, saw their family members imprisoned and otherwise disappear, who came here on tiny boats and started their lives over. They have CHOSEN to be "good" people, to not hold on to hate, to push against being jaded. None of them whine and moan as much as some of you guys do about your terror of some woman getting a free dinner off of you. I guess they all had Stockholm syndrome.
Author musemaj11 Posted December 10, 2010 Author Posted December 10, 2010 I guess they all had Stockholm syndrome. They would suffer from Stockholm Syndrome if they actually enjoyed being in the concentration camps and empathized with the Nazis. You dont even know what Stockholm Syndrome means. I provided the link for you.
GooseChaser Posted December 10, 2010 Posted December 10, 2010 They would suffer from Stockholm Syndrome if they actually enjoyed being in the concentration camps and empathized with the Nazis. You dont even know what Stockholm Syndrome means. I provided the link for you. Stockholm Syndrome relates to people who are hostages in situations like kidnappings and robberies. Women do not keep men "hostage". Men that enjoy being with women don't have Stockholm Syndrome.
Author musemaj11 Posted December 10, 2010 Author Posted December 10, 2010 Stockholm Syndrome relates to people who are hostages in situations like kidnappings and robberies. Women do not keep men "hostage". Men that enjoy being with women don't have Stockholm Syndrome. Stockholm Syndrome is in essence when you are clearly the victim but you refuse to see yourself as one and instead identifies with the oppressor. A gentleman is a slave who doesnt see himself as such.
Mme. Chaucer Posted December 10, 2010 Posted December 10, 2010 They would suffer from Stockholm Syndrome if they actually enjoyed being in the concentration camps and empathized with the Nazis. You dont even know what Stockholm Syndrome means. I provided the link for you. I do, in fact. So far, you are the only person on this thread who appears not to have a grasp of the meaning of "Stockholm Syndrome," but given the level of literacy and comprehension you show here, that's not a surprise.
Mme. Chaucer Posted December 10, 2010 Posted December 10, 2010 A gentleman is a slave who doesnt see himself as such. Is there a word for an assclown who doesn't see himself as such?
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