b21122 Posted December 6, 2010 Posted December 6, 2010 (edited) My boyfriend of 3 years just broke up with me about 3 months ago (I am 22 and he is 23) so I do understand that we are still young. Anyways, he moved across country about 4 months ago while I was finishing up my last year of college here. He always said how much he wanted me to move out there, even wanted me to transfer colleges or something. I decided that would not be best for me and I needed to finish up here, but we still decided to make long distance work for a year. He would always tell me that he still wanted me to move out there and a year would go by fast and we would be together. Well... then one day.. out of the blue he decided to end things. Whenever we first broke up he said that he does not know what he is looking for in a relationship.. I am amazing, beautiful, great to him (yeah, I know) but he needs time to ''find himself'' learn more about life/relationships before he makes such a big commitment/get his finances together.. He said that he didn't see this the end of anything and you never know what could happen down the road, I don't know if he was just trying to be nice so I would not get sad. He still wanted to remain very close, so stupid me did that. We still talked on the phone/text all the time. But I felt like it started to hurt me even more if we just remained this way. He recently came out to visit his family so we tried hanging out then. We had a good time but I knew this would not go anywhere still. I was very upset by everything and finally decided to initiate ''no contact'' because I was hurt so bad. So it has been a couple days since and we have not spoke... it really sucks being inseparable/best friends with someone for a couple years and then it is down to nothing. Having false hopes maybe he will come around but guess we will see in time what is meant to happen. yeah. Any advice on this would help. Has anyone else gone through something like this and what did you do? Edited December 7, 2010 by b21122
Leandro Posted December 7, 2010 Posted December 7, 2010 Well I can't say that I've been in your shoes. I guess the best thing to do is stick with NC. Try not to hope for anything. Things will get better with time, trust me.
Author b21122 Posted December 7, 2010 Author Posted December 7, 2010 Yep and that is all I am going to do..
Leandro Posted December 7, 2010 Posted December 7, 2010 Sorry that I'm not much help today, not a good day for me .
marigo Posted December 7, 2010 Posted December 7, 2010 My ex and i also remained in constant contact for about 3 months after we broke up. We were each others first loves and we both didnt know what to do. Just like you, it was hurting me too much and i finally decided to stay away. We did talk and i said my "goodbye" however, who wouldve known (talk about timing) he'd meet someone shortly after i did that. Until now i wonder what wouldve happened if i remained in contact with him. It hurts really bad. Probably the most pain i have ever felt in my life to have someone as your life, as your bestfriend, as your everything, and in the end, it's gone. I do think though that remaining "no contact" would be the way to go. Its gonna be very difficult, trust me, but you learn to live your life without him even just a little. You'll learn to be more independent again, to try to find happiness that doesnt involve him. I wouldnt say i have found my happiness but in some ways, i think i am a lot better than how i wouldve been if i continued talking to him. I see him every once in a while at work and we're worse than strangers. This is the most painful part of all. You will get through this in time though. Its only been a couple of days since you go NC, hang in there.
Author b21122 Posted December 7, 2010 Author Posted December 7, 2010 Yeah we were still super close for a long time after, talked on the phone all the time/text. It was like nothing happened but I know it would hurt worse to still be close with him and him still end up with someone else. So figured maybe this was the best method to go about things and try to get over it.
Recommended Posts