LaraC Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 After all of the posts about whether or not a woman should make the first move, I saw the shy guy I had written about on the other thread yesterday - this is the shy divorced guy I've liked for a while but the last time I saw him at a party, he was talking to a group of men then he went and sat with some older ladies but not talking to them, just drinking by himself. We never really spoke other than to say hello, and it was suggested here on LS that I make some kind of a move despite that being the man's job, the next time I see him So, I saw him yesterday by complete accident, we attended an event together and ran into each other as he was leaving with his kids... and it would have just been a handshake goodbye until I rememebered what MadMax and everyone else was saying so I asked him how he was doing and we got into a conversation about his kids school and then, the event photographer came by and we all took photos together.... Then they left, I'm really proud of myself, I'm also pretty shy especially if I really like someone so this was a big step... I know I wouldn't have said anything if I hadn't been for reading these threads Just thought I'd share
Mad Max Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 You had nothing to lose like I said earlier. I don't BS people. Some people here don't like my blunt and brutally honest advice, but I say tough.
carhill Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 One step at a time. Next time, flirt a bit. Also, he has no real way of knowing your relationship status, even if you think it's obvious. Since women, both married and in LTR's, can be very 'friendly', it's important to communicate availability, even in passing. 'We were doing xxx and going xxx and I'm not seeing anyone right now so we all did xxxx and bla bla'. Good luck
musemaj11 Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 Small talk is an ability that females were born with. I really dont understand why it seems so hard for a lot of women to initiate conversation with men. I mean they can make a topic to talk about out of nothing while most men need to actually learn to make a small talk.
xpaperxcutx Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 Small talk is an ability that females were born with. I really dont understand why it seems so hard for a lot of women to initiate conversation with men. I mean they can make a topic to talk about out of nothing while most men need to actually learn to make a small talk. There are some women who can't do that. I'm one of them. I can't start random conversations with strangers, I get tongue tied... I think it really comes down to social a person can be, the more laid back you are, the easier it becomes to say Hi. OP I'm happy for you that you initiated, let's hope the next time around you get up the courage to ask him out.
musemaj11 Posted December 6, 2010 Posted December 6, 2010 There are some women who can't do that. I'm one of them. I can't start random conversations with strangers, I get tongue tied... I think it really comes down to social a person can be, the more laid back you are, the easier it becomes to say Hi. But still, generally women are better equipped in this department than men. If you think about it, a shy man is at a much bigger disadvantage than a shy woman. Not only he finds it difficult to talk to a stranger, even after he manages to overcome that issue he still has to deal with the difficulty of keeping a conversation going. There are tons of obstacles that a guy has to go through in order to get a girl. Sometimes I think, "Why the **** am I doing all this just for some stranger?"
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