ihavelotsofcoconuts Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 there's this girl...and she works in a sex shop . and i was in there a couple of days ago with a girlfriend (just a friend that happens to be a girl...chill ) and we were just curiously browsing to see what they had. And this girl absolutely caught my eye. She was gorgeous . The main problem is that I don't know her and don't know how to start talking to her. I wouldn't want her to think i'm some creep from the street asking her out without even talking to her first. Any ideas on what to ask her? Some scenarios maybe that i could put in place to get a conversation started? Maybe something related to the fact that she works at a sex shop (which is kinda unusual in my town) i dunno? Many of you would say that "dude grow a pair and start talking to her!" but so far i'm baffled at the idea that i won't be able to keep any conversation going. It'll be like: "so how come you're working HERE?"..."just earning a living"..."oh...cool...bye". Or something like that. I haven't really picked up "unknown/stranger" girls during my time. All the girls i have ever gone out with were either high-school-mates/ college fellow students. Maybe it's just how i'd react but i don't want her to see me trying to spark up a conversation and be like "oh what the **** does this guy want?" Could you give me some suggestions?
Cee Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 Here's a few ideas: Bring in palm cards or flyers from a concert or poetry reading your friends are part of. Ask for permission to post a couple flyers and talk about the event. Then you'll have an immediate in for a non-sex shop related conversation. And she'll know something about your interests right away. You can then have her as a "contact" to cultivate over time. If you don't participate in any events, then find something big or fun in your area. Ask her if she's going. If she doesn't know about it you can tell her. Or if she knows, you'll have something in common to talk about. Or you could take a wild guess and ask her if she's going to school in the area. A lot of people working in retail are in school or have a second career. The trick is to look at her as a peer and ask her questions you'd ask anybody in your social circle. Break past the clerk/customer barrier and try to befriend her. Just some ideas. Good luck.
JohnnyBlaze Posted December 5, 2010 Posted December 5, 2010 Any ideas on what to ask her? Some scenarios maybe that i could put in place to get a conversation started? Maybe something related to the fact that she works at a sex shop (which is kinda unusual in my town) i dunno? No! Bad doggie! Baaaad doggie! Start with anything but that. Would you start with a question about coffee to a girl working in a coffee shop? Starting on job comments are too much of a cliché. Remember, this is just a job to her, and most girls (most people, for that matter) don't want to be known by their job. Not to mention that she probably hears every sex-based line possible from the perverts that come in (no, I'm not saying that all guys in a sex shop are pervs, but all pervs will find their way to a sex shop). You don't want to be lumped in with those guys. I'm sure others will come up with better starts, but you have a few things you can go with. If you go back in with your friend, let her in on the gig and use her to your advantage. The clerk probably saw you two together and assumed that you two were in a relationship, meaning that you're persona non nookie. So go in with your friend and have the clerk seeing your friend push you to go talk to her. Having another girl around seems to relax women, plus it shows that you two aren't involved. As Cee said, if there are any commonalities you can find, capitalize on them. If she happens to like whatever song is playing (if the store plays music, or if there's a radio behind the counter), or if there's a big local event coming up, you can always play on that. Keep your eyes and ears open for any in's you can find. If you're determined to go for the job approach, do it on her state of mind. If she looks frazzled, you can always do what a friend of mine used to do for me. She'd come into the video store and ask for assistance picking out a video; not because she actually needed any help, but because she was giving me a 2 minute break. I'd come around, go through the aisles, point at a random movie as though I was saying something about it, and then chat with her for a bit. Inversely, if the clerk looks bored, you can talk to her about most anything. If she works opening shift on Sunday, this is primo time. Everyone else will be bringing in the videos they rented the night before, so she'll be bored to tears (if you want an easy excuse, have your friend rent a video the night before and say that you're being a nice guy and returning it for her). The first few times, come in, chat with her for a few minutes and then leave. She is trapped there, after all. You don't want her intimidated, so don't overstay your welcome. After a while, you two may get to the point where you can come in, sit down and chat with her all day long (as my friend did on Sundays), but that's a long way off at this point. Just remember, she's a person. "Sex store clerk" is only her job title, not her title. Keeping that in mind will keep you light years ahead of the others who've hit on her in the store.
Author ihavelotsofcoconuts Posted December 5, 2010 Author Posted December 5, 2010 I'm sure others will come up with better starts, but you have a few things you can go with. If you go back in with your friend, let her in on the gig and use her to your advantage. The clerk probably saw you two together and assumed that you two were in a relationship, meaning that you're persona non nookie. So go in with your friend and have the clerk seeing your friend push you to go talk to her. Having another girl around seems to relax women, plus it shows that you two aren't involved. Yeah but my friend was in from another town...and now she's gone. I was thinking something along the line of making up a story about how my friend was interested in opening up a sex shop in her own town and not having experience in the field she wanted to see how a real sex shop looked. So that's why I'm revisiting, to jot down some notes regarding what we could sell in the so called sex shop. And I would ask her to show some of her more interesting products to me, and from then I'd elaborate: first off i'd introduce myself...does she still go to college? how long has she worked there? does she get many customers? how did she end up with a job in a sex shop (i told you a sex shop here is a little uncommon--and i'm open minded)? Would that work?
Author ihavelotsofcoconuts Posted December 5, 2010 Author Posted December 5, 2010 I'm sure others will come up with better starts, but you have a few things you can go with. If you go back in with your friend, let her in on the gig and use her to your advantage. The clerk probably saw you two together and assumed that you two were in a relationship, meaning that you're persona non nookie. So go in with your friend and have the clerk seeing your friend push you to go talk to her. Having another girl around seems to relax women, plus it shows that you two aren't involved. Yeah but my friend was in from another town...and now she's gone. I was thinking something along the line of making up a story about how my friend was interested in opening up a sex shop in her own town and not having experience in the field she wanted to see how a real sex shop looked. So that's why I'm revisiting, to jot down some notes regarding what we could sell in the so called sex shop. And I would ask her to show some of her more interesting products to me, and from then I'd elaborate: first off i'd introduce myself...does she still go to college? how long has she worked there? does she get many customers? how did she end up with a job in a sex shop (i told you a sex shop here is a little uncommon--and i'm open minded)? Would that work?
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