whatelseisnew Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 Hello all. I've never posted here before, but am feeling the need for support now more than ever. My MM is 15 years older than I, and this has been going on for nearly 2 years. When we started this, his wife was not aware. However, since they have opened up their marriage, and I have spoken with her regarding our relationship (she is ok with this - dysfunctional marriage and has said they are only together for their kids). He has never said he loved me, but has thrown mixed signals about us being together. Unlike many of the relationships I've followed on this site, he's never promised to divorce and has even made it clear that divorce will not occur until his children are grown (8+ years), but has made numerous comments about how "perfect" I am and me being his wife some day. I've officially tried to end things twice now, unsuccessfully. I think I finally need some support. Here's my main question for posting. I've never been so addicted to a male before in my life. They have always chased me. He's not even my "type", not even very attractive to me, and our physical relations are just "so-so" but I fell head over heads with his personality and now I can't let go. This has just started recently. Before this, I honestly could have cared less whether he contacted me or not. And for the most part, he chased me. Now I can't stop chasing him! He's very mature, intelligent, and responsible which is something I have not seen in any of the men I've been close to. Could this be some sort of anxiety issue I'm experiencing suddenly? I can't get him out of my head. I become so weak when he contacts me. He's always on my mind. Would an anti-anxiety medication help me get through this? I feel silly asking my DR for help in this, but I'm losing my mind here. I don't know what has changed. This is not ME! What has helped you move on? Should I surrender and suggest medication from my general DR (she is not aware of this at all, and I don't want to sound crazy if I bring it up)?
spice4life Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 There is nothing wrong with asking for something to help you get through tiimes like these. There is nothing crazy about it at all. If it helps you function while you are trying heal then don't be afraid to ask for it. You are not alone in this and many others have gone on meds to help them through. Do what ever it is you need to do to help yourself...there is nothing wrong with it and it certainly does not mean you're crazy. Habg in there and keep posting. You might find that LS helps just as much as medication does.
pureinheart Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 There is nothing wrong with asking for something to help you get through tiimes like these. There is nothing crazy about it at all. If it helps you function while you are trying heal then don't be afraid to ask for it. You are not alone in this and many others have gone on meds to help them through. Do what ever it is you need to do to help yourself...there is nothing wrong with it and it certainly does not mean you're crazy. Habg in there and keep posting. You might find that LS helps just as much as medication does. Sometimes you need the meds just to deal with LS!!!!!!!!!!:lmao:...just kidding, I would remove myself if it were that bad...I couldn't help myself though:)
pureinheart Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 Hello all. I've never posted here before, but am feeling the need for support now more than ever. My MM is 15 years older than I, and this has been going on for nearly 2 years. When we started this, his wife was not aware. However, since they have opened up their marriage, and I have spoken with her regarding our relationship (she is ok with this - dysfunctional marriage and has said they are only together for their kids). He has never said he loved me, but has thrown mixed signals about us being together. Unlike many of the relationships I've followed on this site, he's never promised to divorce and has even made it clear that divorce will not occur until his children are grown (8+ years), but has made numerous comments about how "perfect" I am and me being his wife some day. I've officially tried to end things twice now, unsuccessfully. I think I finally need some support. Here's my main question for posting. I've never been so addicted to a male before in my life. They have always chased me. He's not even my "type", not even very attractive to me, and our physical relations are just "so-so" but I fell head over heads with his personality and now I can't let go. This has just started recently. Before this, I honestly could have cared less whether he contacted me or not. And for the most part, he chased me. Now I can't stop chasing him! He's very mature, intelligent, and responsible which is something I have not seen in any of the men I've been close to. Could this be some sort of anxiety issue I'm experiencing suddenly? I can't get him out of my head. I become so weak when he contacts me. He's always on my mind. Would an anti-anxiety medication help me get through this? I feel silly asking my DR for help in this, but I'm losing my mind here. I don't know what has changed. This is not ME! What has helped you move on? Should I surrender and suggest medication from my general DR (she is not aware of this at all, and I don't want to sound crazy if I bring it up)? Hi WEIN, Welcome ... I am wondering if MM is not pulling out something in you that you did not realise was there, a past hurt, whatever. This might have less to do with MM and more to do with your past or recent trauma. I totally understand what you are saying and actually this happened with my exfiance` and after my MM got D'ed...so I would venture to say it's an unmet need in me, fear of the future...I seem to be over some of it now. Xanax and Valium are the meds usually prescribed for anti-anxiety, but they are highly addictive so I take less than the dose prescribed so that they work themselves out of my system and there is no half life...also I need less of any med. Your regular doctor can only prescribe these for a short time with some insurance plans...they might send you to a psych if the meds work so that you can continue the prescription. Also I want to add that X and V have been on the market for a long time and I would trust them more than a drug that has just come out as time studies are the best....good luck with this...k...
spice4life Posted December 4, 2010 Posted December 4, 2010 Sometimes you need the meds just to deal with LS!!!!!!!!!!:lmao:...just kidding, I would remove myself if it were that bad...I couldn't help myself though:) LOL!!! I hear ya for sure. It can be quite entertaining at times can't it?
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