Snowdrop Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 I just broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years a couple of days ago. I'm currently on a year abroad in France for my university course which started in September, and we've seen each other a couple of times between then and now and had an amazing time. However, I felt like I wasn't getting enough support or little gestures showing he cared about me- something I was used to when we were n the same country together. I mentioned it to him several times over the last month and a half, over the phone and when we met up face to face. Each time he would promise to make more effort but it never happened- he was too wrapped up in what he was doing back home and it seemed 'out of sight, out of mind' is exactly how he felt. Without having regular contact with me in person (we did speak/skype every day), he didn't feel 'in love' and so didn't have the motivation to do those nice things for me. So, after his 5th chance and no contact, let alone something special, I broke it off with him. That was 2 days ago. He didn't contact me or anything. Today I couldn't stop myself from calling him, not quite sure of what I wanted him to say. When we spoke, he said he thought I'd made the right decision, he couldn't do anymore for me 'right now' and probably wasn't the right person for me. I've just cried for hours and hours. I thought he wouldn't give up so easily and just accept it, but he has. I text him saying I loved him and maybe he's right and he text back saying he loved me too but we cant make each other happy. I don't know what to do or how to feel?? I come home in 2 weeks for Christmas, do I suggest a meet up face to face and see how we feel then? Or does it seem like its over for real? I'm only going to be away for 6 more months and we're happy when we're together...
Don_da_Ho Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 Sorry you're in this situation Snow. LDRs are VERY difficult. He may have met someone else. Clearly he hasn't been that into you lately, that's why he hasn't been showing you more attention. I would suggest that you not contact him at all the next couple of weeks. Chasing him will do no good. You can ask if he will see you AFTER you get home.
Author Snowdrop Posted December 3, 2010 Author Posted December 3, 2010 I doubt he's met someone else, he can barely handle one girlfriend let alone two. It's more that he's very selfish and needs (and does) spend most of the time doing exactly what he wants to do without thinking that much about how his actions affect others. He's also doing his finals so don't think he can handle more than one difficult situation in his life. Not like I asked for much being away from friends and family...
SlawKing Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 You went away to a foreign land. He's probably afraid that you're going to find someone better while you're out there and he's distancing himself so that it won't hurt as much when you do. A lot of guys think this way. Either that or he doesn't want to be in a long distance relationship where he's hardly ever getting laid. It's a harsh truth, but your guy is either afraid of losing you or tired of waiting.
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