Infidelity may have a genetic component...

[Tony T]

Scientists are finding that infidelity may not have all to do with morals but a genetic predisposition. So there may be hope that, at least, those who are caught will have a plausible explanation for their behavior.

 

Go here: http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2010/12/02/5563195-honey-its-not-my-fault-its-the-one-night-stand-gene

[jthorne]

Sorry, don't buy it. What about people who are people born of alcoholics (and believe alcoholism is genetic) who don't become one?

 

I can't say the study looked all that reliable, but I'll admit to not putting much stock into anything MSNBC might print.

 

I guess if it gives comfort to those looking to excuse bad behavior and ignore that God might have given them a gene, but He also gave them a brain with which to make good choices...

[greengoddess]

:laugh:

 

Ok I'm not really buying it either.

BUT... ok when I think back at all my friends who were from divorced families they have also gone through divorces too. Makes you wonder...genetic cheating, don't put much credibility into marriage being a lifetime commitment, different morals etc etc. I really think all my friends who have had lasting longterm marriages are also from families with lasting longterm marriages. Maybe they just saw really good examples of love growing up and followed them.

[Owl]

"The D(opamine) made me do it!"

 

Haven't we heard that argument before? LOL!

 

It's always got to be SOMETHING out of our control.

[desertIslandCactus]

I am going to say that it would be a person who wishes to Escape the reality of their life, to hide, to go into fantasy, a dreamer, a romantic, procrastinater.

[jthorne]

:laugh:

 

Ok I'm not really buying it either.

BUT... ok when I think back at all my friends who were from divorced families they have also gone through divorces too. Makes you wonder...genetic cheating, don't put much credibility into marriage being a lifetime commitment, different morals etc etc. I really think all my friends who have had lasting longterm marriages are also from families with lasting longterm marriages. Maybe they just saw really good examples of love growing up and followed them.

Yep, I was going to re-read the article, but am pressed for time. I don't recall anything in the article that referred to the possibility that the cheating might have been modeled for them and have nothing to do with genetics.

 

Look at the number of OW here whose families were involved in infidelity.

[greengoddess]

Wouldn't it be romantic though? I mean if you were programmed that way. If you were someone who could lie without the guilt, cheat without hurting someone. I could never cheat. I feel guilty if I lie and say I am in one store when I am in another because I am buying something for the person I am speaking with but think about it.

 

If you could do it, if you could stomach the lies and deceit would it not be fun to have someone constantly telling you how absolutely amazing you are and never get enough of you because you spend so little actual physical time together. What an ego boost. Then after spending the day separated from your spouse being text sweet words and someone wanting to get in your pants all day at work you go home to an amazing family that loves you.

 

Ahhhh the best of both worlds. Excitement and love all day long...if I could only stomach lying to those I love daily.

[freestyle]

DNA testing before a first date---hilarious.

 

I predict this study will be used by some as a blank check for bad behavior.

 

let's start laying odds on how long it takes before a politician caught cheating tries to use the "cheating gene" publicly,as a defense.........

 

This reminds me of a debate that was going when I first joined LS---is it really just biological imperative? That a male has the subconscious drive to spread his seed as far and wide as possible, so that offers an explanantion /rationalization for cheating..........

 

I guess some could view it that way--I prefer to think that humans are capable of evolving and adapting, and making conscious choices about how they behave.

 

..................I'd like to hope so, anyways...........

[xxoo]

Interesting. I've considered before that cheating falls under the umbrella of risk-taking behaviors in general, and would be more common with risk takers than non-risk takers. That's why cheating is SO common with successful people--you have to take risks to acheive greatness in business, sports, politics, etc.

 

I accept the genetic component toward risk-taking behaviors. I know and accept that I am the opposite--I am risk averse, and believe that to be a part of my genetic makeup. Still, being risk averse is not an excuse for me to act in ways that hurt my family (refusing to get in a car because of anxiety, or holding back my children from experiencing a life of normal risks, for example).

 

In the same way, being a risk taker is not an excuse for acting in ways that hurt a person's spouse and children. An adult--a parent, a spouse--needs to take responsibility for their actions despite their genetic predispositions. Being a risk-taker does NOT mean a person is unaware that their actions are wrong and hurtful. Doing the right thing is a challenge, no matter what your personal demons are.

[goingstrong]

From a male point of view it is obvious that we are biologically programmed to cheat.

[karnak]

From a male point of view it is obvious that we are biologically programmed to cheat.

 

I don't see why it's obvious.

[Distant78]

From a male point of view it is obvious that we are biologically programmed to cheat.

 

And our minds are biologically made to prevent or think those sexual urges-that sexual primal instinct-over before acting on them. Sorry, i'm not in your genrealization.

[GorillaTheater]

I think I'm genetically predisposed to occasionally want to beat my neighbor half to death with a gravel rake.

 

But so far I've abstained.

[Distant78]

This whole article is a complete nuisance. That's like saying when someone insults our grandmother's with cancer, we can't stop ourselves from beating the shyt out of them. I don't care if scientists or other people assume that some small, unimportant human hormone or oxytocin can make us cheat. Sorry I don't buy it. People need to stop trying to find an excuse to cheat and grow the ***** up and accept responsibility for what you've done to your SO/spouse and/or kids and family.

[bentnotbroken]

I don't see why it's obvious.

 

 

Me either, since all men don't cheat. Hmm predisposition for doing the right thing....interesting.

[wheelwright]

Is this gene the same one that makes us prone to falling in love with a MOM decades after we meet our MP?

 

Shall we rewind and call this the oldie but goodie, fate vs freewill?

 

Or rather, making a choice.

 

If I were to go by what my parents bequeathed me genetically, and based on their behaviour,

 

I would be rich, poor, dead, unable to maintain friendships, a loser, a great singer, divorced, abusive, a runner, a manipulator, lonely.

 

I would also be determined, charming, cold, a workaholic, an alcoholic, great at parking, keen on red cars, growing old disgracefully.

 

I don't doubt I have a gene that means I am more curious than average. That makes me me. My choices meant I cheated.

 

Because I fell in love, and I didn't know how to play that find in life.

 

Is there a gene for something so ridiculous/sad?

[JackJack]

I think all people, can be predisposed to something genetically, HOWEVER, most everything we do, is still a choice.

[Spark1111]

This is the old nurture/nature argument. Or, destiny versus freewill.

 

I have a genetic predisposition to genius, alcoholism and insanity.

 

I have nourished my intellect, monitor my drinking habits, and safeguard my mental health since the age I could read and research.

 

I have armed myself with the knowledge and skills to recognize any symptoms that would require professional help, a time out, a need to regroup.

 

So far, I'm doing fine.

 

How is a propensity towards infidelity any different?

 

Some people just like to wallow in their ignorance to excuse a whole host of self-destructive behaviors.

 

They live the life they deserve.

[goingstrong]

For karnak, distant, and particularly bent, who seems to think that our brains and bodies are all unisex...I said biologically programmed to cheat...I was not saying that our brains are not capable to resist or overcome that urge.

 

Male humans are physically programmed to reproduce just like most other male animals..with a high sperm count, high sex drive, and the ability to take on as many women in a 3 day weekend as the number of hours that I have. Now I don't need some 500K$ government study or the countless number of "click and paste" internet scholars on this forum to tell me what I consider to be common sense.

 

Argue all you want, believe what your gonna believe, tell us men what we are thinking, but it isn't going to change it one bit.

 

As far as the same question goes for women, biologically ...maybe. Mentally, I would not know as I not a woman, nor would I presume to tell them on this forum how they think or feel.

[karnak]

For karnak, distant, and particularly bent, who seems to think that our brains and bodies are all unisex...I said biologically programmed to cheat...I was not saying that our brains are not capable to resist or overcome that urge.

 

Male humans are physically programmed to reproduce just like most other male animals..with a high sperm count, high sex drive, and the ability to take on as many women in a 3 day weekend as the number of hours that I have. Now I don't need some 500K$ government study or the countless number of "click and paste" internet scholars on this forum to tell me what I consider to be common sense.

 

Argue all you want, believe what your gonna believe, tell us men what we are thinking, but it isn't going to change it one bit.

 

As far as the same question goes for women, biologically ...maybe. Mentally, I would not know as I not a woman, nor would I presume to tell them on this forum how they think or feel.

 

Honestly I don't think cheating is connected to any sort of genetic component. Basically cheating is done by selfish, irresponsible people who have no problem in hurting others behind their backs, or who don't think twice before doing stupid things.

 

Many people have no problem in robbing or deceiving their fellow men/women. Is criminality then a genetic component? Maybe so. Who knows?

 

To me what is the most important is that I don't like stealing things. And I prefer to keep away from people who do so. In my opinion cheating (like everything else that is done is the "darkness" and behind people's backs) is more a result of a lack of moral code or a bad upbringing than in the way a person is born.

 

And yes: women cheat just as much as men. They're just better at hiding it. We men are more incompetent at hiding our mistakes.

[bentnotbroken]

For karnak, distant, and particularly bent, who seems to think that our brains and bodies are all unisex...I said biologically programmed to cheat...I was not saying that our brains are not capable to resist or overcome that urge.

 

Male humans are physically programmed to reproduce just like most other male animals..with a high sperm count, high sex drive, and the ability to take on as many women in a 3 day weekend as the number of hours that I have. Now I don't need some 500K$ government study or the countless number of "click and paste" internet scholars on this forum to tell me what I consider to be common sense.

 

Argue all you want, believe what your gonna believe, tell us men what we are thinking, but it isn't going to change it one bit.

 

As far as the same question goes for women, biologically ...maybe. Mentally, I would not know as I not a woman, nor would I presume to tell them on this forum how they think or feel.

 

 

Not only do I not think bodies or brains are unisex, I think your irksome tirades leave much to be desired. As you said we all have opinions. But I do believe lack of morals and intelligent anuses are unisex.

[Silly_Girl]

Yep, I was going to re-read the article, but am pressed for time. I don't recall anything in the article that referred to the possibility that the cheating might have been modeled for them and have nothing to do with genetics.

 

Look at the number of OW here whose families were involved in infidelity.

 

And BS's and WS's, and people who have never been any of the 3

[Silly_Girl]

I'd love to see a thread like this on a forum for recovering drug addicts, some of the posters here would definitely post, saying "You have a genetic disposition to NOTHING, you're just a loser who should have said No!"

 

It's good to understand why things happen. Excusing and understanding are two different things.

[karnak]

I was once an alcoholic. And no-one on my family (as far as I know) has a drinking problem.

 

I used alcohol to forget my emotional issues. As soon as I decided it was time to stop and enjoy life, I managed to.

[bentnotbroken]

I'd love to see a thread like this on a forum for recovering drug addicts, some of the posters here would definitely post, saying "You have a genetic disposition to NOTHING, you're just a loser who should have said No!"

 

It's good to understand why things happen. Excusing and understanding are two different things.

 

 

In in some cases that is absolutely true.