Breakup Ettiquette for the dumpee, when it feels wrong, it's right?

[fiat500]

I'm second guessing myself. Need help. My ex dumped me a few weeks ago. His birthday is on Friday and we've been in NC. I feel like sh**t and like a bad guy if I don't wish him well.

 

But I deserve my self respect. I can't wish him a Happy Birthday. I deserve to be respected.

 

Has anyone been in this situation. What is the right thing to do?

[GreenPolicy]

Don't wish him a Happy Birthday. If he wanted to celebrate it with you, he wouldn't have dumped you. My exe's birthday was two and a half weeks after she dumped me. I agonized over it as well, but that's what I told myself to justify not breaking NC.

[Damaged23]

Yeah, i wouldn't wish him Happy Birthday either. It'll be hard, but whatever. He doesn't deserve to hear it from you

[whatadeer26]

Don't do it.

[fiat500]

Thank you, guys. I won't. I think I would feel like an idiot if I did. And what's worse it would make me look pathetic to him.

 

I just don't want to be the bad guy. I don't want him to think I hate him.

[Leandro]

Thank you, guys. I won't. I think I would feel like an idiot if I did. And what's worse it would make me look pathetic to him.

 

I just don't want to be the bad guy. I don't want him to think I hate him.

yes, it would make you look pathetic. You might not like the reply you get, that's even if he replies. Either way it will hurt like hell. You're not the bad guy! Always remember that.

[cerridwen]

Don't do it fiat. Depending on the type of person he is, he'll either mildly pity you, get off on having you thinking of him, or he'll ignore it.

 

Sadly, it won't likely break his day not to hear from you but it will likely break yours if you make contact.

[fiat500]

Yeah. I'm SO NOT contacting that bastard. He can go get off on some skank at college for his b-day.