adamandro Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 Ok, so to try cut the story right now .. 3 years we were together, and we got engaged last year. Been living together for 2 years. First 2 years, she and I had a rom com life.. perfect to be honest. At the beginning of the year i was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, which totally rocked my world as you could imagine! I lost my way with my business.. to be honest my diabetes became my job.. lost my ambition, sold loads of stuff to live, and to be quite honest made my girlfriend's life pretty tough looking back. I got a new job, quit that because i had to take 3 buses to work and my health was suffering as well as being a nightmare to be around. I wouldn't listen to her about really anything and accused her of always nagging at me. She also covered my rent for a month which was the most demoralizing feeling i ever had. We moved flat to try and save money, but it was a serious downgrade of an apartment. We both knew it, and to be honest it was my fault. 1 month later after arguing all the time and my financial situation she said "i'm moving out..". After pretty much begging her to stay, she did. Another month passes.. I found a number in her purse.. confronted her (and tricked her) into telling me that she went out on a date with another guy.. few texts and they kissed. Broke my heart, but i couldn't help feel some responsibility for driving her away. After 1 week of me making her life hell for doing it.. she said " i'm moving out".. this time with no arguements from me. She found some random flat 30mins away with another girl. That was 1 month ago. Since then, we have met up every weekend and slept together every time (stupid i know). Numerous phone calls, and facebook etc. It got to a point last weekend where it was quite emotional and agreed not to speak at least for a few weeks to work out where we are as it was hurting not living together and still seeing each other. Although deep down that's not what i wanted. Simple situation, SHE wanted to know i can change and be the supportive person i used to be before she could consider being with me or living together again. Fair enough, paying someone's rent is the quickest way to kill the passion. Ironically, over this last month i have started to become the person i used to be because of having to find my own strength again alone. Health is much better too. It's been tough though. MY demand is her to prove to me she would never allow this to happen again. To be honest, i can live with a kiss.. but the hardest thing to know is if she's still seeing him or dating etc. assurances are not good enough to put my mind at rest.. and i hate it when doubt starts to set in! Now I've got a new job, was playing a gig with my band which she saw on facebook and BAM.. she wanted to meet again. It seems, that getting on with your own life and not worrying about them, is actually the quickest way to get them back..So we met on Saturday, and it was a pretty great night. Seemed like we'd got past the point of arguing about why things happenned and who's fault it was.. to basically hanging out on a date. And we stayed at her new flat for the first time as we've been staying at mine since she moved out. To be honest i didn't think i'd get to see the inside of that flat. Great night and great morning. But it's Wednesday and no contact from either of us.. suggestions ?? Feels like it's moving slowly but should i stick with the no contact? We have kinda agreed to go away for a weekend in January. December is very busy with her work parties etc. and i feel i may be shunted a bit.. so i'm keeping myself busy, but not sure if i should try and keep the fire burning a little or play the cool card.. Ok so rant over.. thanks for listening!
Idalis Posted December 3, 2010 Posted December 3, 2010 So you went from living with your g/f to being engaged to her dating someone else to now dating your ex fiance? Are you seirously okay with that? If she was okay to leave you when the going got tough *with your diabetes* what makes you think this wont happen again next time something else comes up? I would not be okay with that, especially after having been downgraded from a fiance to a "date". I think you deserve better and I think you know it. The only way I could understand you sticking around is if she were to assure you she was not still dating the other guy she dated and to fully commit to your relationship again. Otherwise, it seems like she's just playing games.
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