sumdude Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 (edited) OK there's always a lot of talk about what we want in a mate. Seems like some folks have a laundry lists of requirements. As I get older the list gets shorter. Having been married then divorced and gone through a few relationships it really becomes more clear what really matters. Attraction. I find the majority of women beautiful in different ways so that's no huge hurdle. Trust. Without it you will live in constant doubt which ain't great for anxiety, stress and your health. Lack of it will eventually doom the relationship. She has to be a nice person. Communication is the foundation of a relationship. If you can't communicate you can't solve problems. Conversation has to flow, you also don't want to get bored with each other in the long haul. Openness builds intimacy. Lifestyle. If you're a night owl who enjoys nights out with a few brews it ain't gonna last with a teetotaler who gets up at 5 AM on a Sunday. Patience. You need truckloads of it to make it through the hard times... and there will always be those hard times. Edited December 1, 2010 by sumdude
SmileFace Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 I don't like lists ,so no laundry list for me. I only want three things in a guy -Straight Forward , I don't like people who beat around the bush.So I guess this falls under good communication. -Has dreams in life, I don't care what they are but I want him to have some kind of goals. - Sexually Compatible, Yeah this matters.
Author sumdude Posted December 1, 2010 Author Posted December 1, 2010 - Sexually Compatible, Yeah this matters. Yes it does, I put in the Attraction department. Thing about sex is that it can ebb and flow over many years. The honeymoon phase will end. When there's two kids, a mortgage, ailing family and little time is where Patience comes into the sex thing.
Els Posted December 1, 2010 Posted December 1, 2010 (edited) Well, I'm sure everyone wants a loyal, honest, nice, patient, etc person so I won't go there. Instead, I'll sum it all up as: 1) A decent person who treats me well as both a person in general and a girlfriend specifically. 2) Mental, emotional, and sexual compatibility. - Mental: Probably the most stringent and possibly self-defeating criteria of the lot, but I can't help it. Most people want someone 'not dumb'. I want someone brilliant. Someone who can tantalise me with razor-sharp wit and humor, someone who possesses the logical-analytical capabilities to keep up with me, and the thirst for constant acquisition of knowledge to have stimulating intellectual conversations with. 90% of men probably do not qualify, and I make no apologies for that. - Emotional: Kindred-spirit feeling. An acceptable level of similarity with regard to personalities and passions. - Sexual: Has to look not-ugly (90% of men probably qualify, you just have to be not morbidly obese) and be open-minded, willing to try new things, and dominant in bed. Rather long, I know, but hey, it still can be summed up into two criteria! Edited December 1, 2010 by Elswyth
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