he wants to stop

[eReau]

So my bf and I have been together for 7months in a long distance relationship, he's over seas. I recently went to visit him and found out that he had been carrying on emotional relationships and entertaining the desires of other women (his exes back home where I am) while he's away. Most of the females he has know for years and they have their own partners bfs, fioncees and they have just always been there. He told me he didn't know how to cut them off and wants to do right by me.

So we went thru the list together and one by one deleted them from his email accounts phone books, pics videos they sent and called them together as he told them they he was only misleading them out of boredom and curiosity and that he's is and always has been fully committed to me. I know that I can't take that at %100 bc they could easily just accept him back at any time as desperate woman do but I at least feel good knowing that if I see them pop back up he allowed it to happen and I'll have no second thoughts of leaving. These females have been there for years tho thru all of his girlfriends, they knew about them and didn't care or respect his previous relationships, looking thru the conversations with them I would see them say things like "is she better than me" "what does she have that I don't" "your wife won't like you talking to me" "she's gorgeous you sure you wanna lose that for me" so I know they would have no problem running if he blows his dog whistle no matter how much he hurt their feelings when we called.

 

I know I'm crazy in choosing to forgive but a part of me feels like I have to try to forgive him for myself or else I'll be bitter and angry and incomplete and just wonder what if. The problem that he has stems from his father I think who is in love with several different woman, they each have a piece of his heart and them his, and I'm pretty sure they're all aware of It too.

my bf tells me he doesn't want to end up like him and he wants to change but doesn't know how. He said that a part of him is happy that I found out bc he didn't think he could make the steps to start cutting them off himself although he tried previously he only managed to distance a few. He said that there has been no sexual contact but when he was home last he did meet up with two of them kiss them and make plans to have sex but he never followed thru with it bc he never left my side the rest of the days he was home.

I'm not asking if I should forgive him I've already decided to give him a second chance, but I am asking for help in the process. For the both of us. We've talked about counseling but its so much harder bc he is over seas.

I want to know how do I get rid of all this anger inside me and start to heal. How can he change his habits and break the cycle of cheating. He told me today that he needs me more than ever bc he now has no one to talk to beside me. That cutting off everyone was cutting off his outlets to home too. He said when he feels the urge to reach out he'll find a way to tell me or he'll write about it in his online journal so that I can read it and we can create the conversation that way.

He'll be home in 6-9 months and we're planning on relocating together but I want to nip this in the bud now. I can't wait months to start to fix us. I believe he is genuine I just don't know how to help him, where to start, what to say, what exercises to do. What if we run out of things to say or if I'm fluttered by anger and push him back into their waiting claws.

Thanks for any help <3