asdfTT123 Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 Hey everyone, I hope everyone is well during this holiday season. I was hoping I could get some advice from the experienced about dating a shy and insecure type of girl. I met this girl not long ago (less than one month ago) and we started formally dating about a week ago. As a little bit of background, she's an exchange student from China and has only been in the US for a few months, though her English is excellent. She's also smart, beautiful, and I love her personality - I was literally going crazy over her this past week when I was out of town. She's also very traditional with her values and beliefs (i.e. family and relationships). A challenge for me in this relationship is that she's a shy and insecure girl. She's told me about being heartbroken in her previous relationships and how she's afraid about being hurt. However, she's decided to place her trust in me. Another thing that bothers her is that I told her it hasn't been too long since I've been with my ex (only a few months) of five years. She's conveyed to me that she insecure about her appearance, ability with English, her personality, etc. Of course, I wouldn't be dating her if I wasn't crazy about her, so there's obviously nothing wrong with her. We're both serious about relationships (i.e. we want something deep and with longevity) as we're both sick of just dating/messing around. I've been giving her a lot of compliments because she often talks down about herself and I try to talk and hang out with her often since she mentioned she always questions how much I may like her. Of course, it's no problem for me because I enjoy every minute of it. I try to maintain a pretty secure and confident figure for her because I feel like it's best to balance things out. One of my concerns is being able to give each other space - something valuable that I learned from my previous relationship with my ex and also keeping the passion going. It would be great if I could get some advice as to how best to approach this girl since I've never dated someone quite like her. Already, she's beginning to open up to me about personal things and she's starting to joke and kid around, though in a bit of an insecure way. Also, I kind of like the challenge of dating a shy/insecure girl and trying to get her to open up to me - hopefully my hard work will pay off and I can make her more confident in herself. Thanks a bunch.
Untouchable_Fire Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 It would be great if I could get some advice as to how best to approach this girl since I've never dated someone quite like her. Already, she's beginning to open up to me about personal things and she's starting to joke and kid around, though in a bit of an insecure way. Also, I kind of like the challenge of dating a shy/insecure girl and trying to get her to open up to me - hopefully my hard work will pay off and I can make her more confident in herself. Thanks a bunch. Just an FYI... girls with that type of personality tend to be attracted to outgoing take charge type of guys. Whatever the situation make sure you step up to the plate and handle it. You choose what restaurants and plan dates... pay attention to any input she gives you, but don't be afraid to push her to do something new. With the compliments. Mix them up... don't be afraid to focus on one or two things she is really insecure about. Make sure that when doing anything physical... you show some really intense passion! Especially when kissing. It's as important as the compliments.
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