DeppFan04 Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 2 Simple Questions for you girls: If you truly truly love a guy, would you flirt with other guys? Does most flirting lead to cheating?
moimeme Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 Does most flirting lead to cheating? No. There's flirting for fun and there's serious flirting. In the first, you're pretending to be interested, but you're just playing (the other person is, too; in reality neither of you is interested); in the second, there is intent.
monkey00 Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 yes even if a girl did have a bf, she'd just flirt for fun...playing games on men making them think they're interested when they're not
carla Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 Once again I totally agree with moimeme. Some people flirt and don't even realise what they are doing b/c they are really friendly. Same as some people get flirted with and don't even realise it. They just think that the person is really friendly.
jenny Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 agreed with above. flirting is a fun, healthy, way to drive the nihilism away. it does not mean anything beyond that moment when it is done properly. grammatically, it should only occur in the present - not indicate a possible future event, not reference a past, just that moment of fun. it's just recognizing another human being as attractive and charming: it's aesthetic, social; not personal. i flirt with all genders often - it means nothing.
dlb311 Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 I say flirting means something. Because if I am flirting with someone its because I am attracted to them. But it doesn't mean that I will act on any feelings I have. If I have a boyfriend like I do. I can flirt its healthy, and be attracted to someone but I would never take it any further and if the oppurtinity came for me to advance on it I would walk away.... I think that couples should not flirt in front of each other that is plan cruel. I know some people flirt and don't even realize it..but you should be considerate to your mate that he/she doesn't need to see that if he or she is with you, you should be flirting with them... that is just my opinion...
sweetbilly Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 So, how can a guy tell if a woman is flirting and actually wants something to happen, Or if she's just messing with his head?
moimeme Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 Nobody should mess with anybody's head. The 'fun flirting' I mention is done in a case where both of you are decidedly not genuinely interested and only pretend that you are for the sake of silliness and fun.
dlb311 Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 first off if some girl you are dating or talking to is flirting with someone else in front of you that isn't cool. She is probably trying to get your jealous to see how much you like her. Or for you to commite. or maybe she doesn't even know she is doing it? But if you think she knows she is doing it and in front of you then she is playing games and that isn't cool. I would not let her see you care... she will get over it if a woman wants to flirt with someone and want to do something about it... she better be single if not then she is shouldn't be taken...
sweetbilly Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 Ok, so is there a difference between women who are spoken for, and single girls?
dlb311 Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 I would think so... only because the single girls can take it farther if they want so flirting is like a mating call... you flirt talk dance get numbers then call and date each other... so usualy starts off with flirting? But if she is taken maybe she likes the boost in her selfesteem.... you seem to be worried care to explain your situation better....
meanon Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 No. I love flirting but I can tell if someone is taking it seriously and I'd stop. It's like shared humour - you can tell if someone gets the joke.
sweetbilly Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 I'm not really worried, just really confused. I mean, even freud died not understanding what women wanted. Besides there's this woman in my speech class that ocasionally winks at me, and i'm really bad at recoginizing the signs. I don't really know if she's flirting with me or if she has brain-damage. She's pretty cute, and says she has a B/F but i don't know if this is just to get me interested or what. I've been trying to get an anwser on this for a long time, so in a way i'm glad this thread was posted.
monkey00 Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 Originally posted by jenny i flirt with all genders often - it means nothing. hm..even gays, bis an girls? how do they react?? hehehe yea girls will flirt for fun and will flirt if they're interested. ive had that happen, so it's annoyin sometimes when you cant figure a girl out.
faux Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 Interesting how women find it is fine to flirt when with someone, yet get so enraged when their partner does it, or in most cases is just being friendly. This situation is all too familiar: "Who was that girl at the mall?" What girl? Huh? "The one at the mall last week." I don't remember any girl. "Oh please! You know which one I'm talking about. She was all over you dressed like a skank with that short skirt. And you were talking to her like forever." What girl are you talking about? "You gave her a cigarette." Oh yeah! Yeah I don't know who she is. Just some girl that asked for a cigarette. Why? "Aaargh!" Women can flirt with other men, but men aren't allowed to even look at another woman.
jenny Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 She was all over you dressed like a skank with that short skirt. well, if you were wearing a skanky short skirt, it would be hard to resist you. (this is now my favourite misplaced modifier )
dlb311 Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 I think its okay for both as long as when you have a s/o you are not taking it any further than that. And don't do it in front of your s/o of course female or male they are going to get jealous... that is our nature. I think about the girl in your speech class that winks at you. You say she has a boyfriend so she should be off limited wether or not she would like to play with you or not. You should not because you wouldn't want someone taking advantage of your girl... not that its him taking her but if you don't give into her then she can't do it... I think you should find someone who is available to flirt with.. unless you just like to flirt but then you can't try to analyze it you just have to have fun with it...
sweetbilly Posted March 11, 2004 Posted March 11, 2004 well, just because a woman has a B/F dosen't mean she wants to be with him. There wouldn't be anything wrong if she likes me and broke it off with him so we could go out. I don't like cheaters either, but if you're not wearing a ring your not exactly taken either. I think it's ok to look for someone who will make you happy, at least until you get married.
monkey00 Posted March 12, 2004 Posted March 12, 2004 Originally posted by faux Interesting how women find it is fine to flirt when with someone, yet get so enraged when their partner does it, or in most cases is just being friendly. This situation is all too familiar: "Who was that girl at the mall?" What girl? Huh? "The one at the mall last week." I don't remember any girl. "Oh please! You know which one I'm talking about. She was all over you dressed like a skank with that short skirt. And you were talking to her like forever." What girl are you talking about? "You gave her a cigarette." Oh yeah! Yeah I don't know who she is. Just some girl that asked for a cigarette. Why? "Aaargh!" Women can flirt with other men, but men aren't allowed to even look at another woman. I agree when a guy does it they get all paranoid. I think deep down they feel insecure, because of this they want to be controlling. man if i had a girl that did that, i'd just shove it in her face that she's overreacting. my friend's girl is a controlling one, it's a long distance relationship. but even if he hangs out with his guy buddies or wherever, she will get on his case and get bitchy about it...trying to be controlling. that's why he's intending to dump her.
dyermaker Posted March 12, 2004 Posted March 12, 2004 Originally posted by sweetbilly well, just because a woman has a B/F dosen't mean she wants to be with him. Usually, it does.
faux Posted March 12, 2004 Posted March 12, 2004 Originally posted by jenny well, if you were wearing a skanky short skirt, it would be hard to resist you. (this is now my favourite misplaced modifier ) I wasn't the one wearing a skanky short skirt. I hope that isn't the secret to attracting women though... I'm not used to shaving my legs and I might scare people wearing a skanky short skirt. Hmm. But as to the flirting topic, I see many sides to it as I am trying to approach it from different viewpoints. It's important to feel wanted. I can see that, even if you are with someone, it might be nice to prove that you are desireable, not even just to you partner. What I mean to say is that in a way it can enforce your belief in what your partner says when he or she compliments you; You will really know that they are happy to be with you, and that they are proud to walk hand in hand with you because you have seen others look at you. It's a great confidence booster. Then again, one person may feel that their admiration ought to be enough. I can name at least one time where a girl complained she didn't notice herself being checked out, and I felt unwanted because my admiration was not enough to make her happy. I became angry. No matter how much I would lavish her with attention and compliments, and I meant them, she wanted it from other people. I just wasn't good enough. It can go many ways. I would prefer to think a girlfriend of mine would not flirt with anyone else, but I would thin it fine if someone took a fancy and expressed it to her. It's as I said a great confidence booster. I'd just be uncomfortable if she flirted back or initiated it.
monkey00 Posted March 12, 2004 Posted March 12, 2004 Originally posted by faux What I mean to say is that in a way it can enforce your belief in what your partner says when he or she compliments you; You will really know that they are happy to be with you, and that they are proud to walk hand in hand with you because you have seen others look at you. It's a great confidence booster. yes I DO agree particularly about this. Girls want they can't have & what other's want as well. It does increase the attraction between the 2 cause they know he/she got jealous and that he/she is wanted by others (even if it means flirting). It's almost the same as collecting those $2 bills...remember those that existed back then?? (oranything else that ppl usually collect) If No one cared or wanted that $2 bill, the no one else would care if it did not exist anymore. but since other's want it cause of it's rarity, you will too because it's off importance. think about say you were to bid the mona lisa in an auction. IF no one wanted it, it would not be sooooooooooo expensive. it would've been butt cheap to buy or given away. but since it's soooo popular and desired by everyone, that initially makes the bidding of it that much more successful, and would cost more money thatn you could imagine. It is a great confidence booster.
fueg0 Posted March 12, 2004 Posted March 12, 2004 it's human nature to flirt, whether it's a guy or a girl doing it, single or attached. it's not something that can be avoided unless you lock yourself up in a cell and refuse to make contact with the rest of society. flirting, however, doesn't necessarily lead to cheating. how far girls OR guys let the flirting go is usually up to them. it's avoidable, but it's not impossible.
reasontosigh Posted March 12, 2004 Posted March 12, 2004 I wasn't the one wearing a skanky short skirt. I hope that isn't the secret to attracting women though... I'm not used to shaving my legs and I might scare people wearing a skanky short skirt. Think of it as a mini-kilt. Give it a try....betcha some of us out there would flirt with you!
littlelavenderlilac Posted March 12, 2004 Posted March 12, 2004 Sweetbilly, If a girl is flirting and is actually interested, she will let you know for sure... Either she will ask you out, give you her phone number or get yours... end of story. My advice is to stop worrying about it, be patient, and let her make the call.. it will make you more desirable anyway.. -littlelavenderlilac- a.ka. "flirty"
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