qinboxmail Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 I've been with my gf for 3 months. Normally I'm the one who call her a lot, ask her to go with me. This morning I called her and she sounds grumpy. Later I called and she was like we talk everyday don't you get bored ? I don't know what to do. I love her a lot and miss her when I don't see her or talk to her. I'm not the clingy type. Just that I think about her often more than she thinks about me. She says she wants space and stuff. What could I do to improve this situation ? Thank you.
Author qinboxmail Posted November 27, 2010 Author Posted November 27, 2010 I need feedbacks. Please help.
Star Gazer Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 She says she wants space and stuff. What could I do to improve this situation ? Give her the space she's asking for.
musemaj11 Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 How are you not clingy when you clearly are? Lol
green_tea Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 How are you not clingy when you clearly are? Lol That's a bit harsh. He only appears clingy because she doesn't seem to feel the same way about him. There is nothing wrong with talking to someone every day that you've been in a relationship with for 3 months. This morning I called her and she sounds grumpy. Later I called and she was like we talk everyday don't you get bored ? OP this isn't good - try to give her some time and space and see if that helps, if not it may be time to have a talk with her.
Sanman Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 There isn't much you can do other than give her space. But, do you want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't think of you often and doesn't seem to contact you either?
Seamless74 Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 Honestly i say that means move on or start either pretending or actually talking to some other girl youd be suprised how all of a sudden she doesnt need space anymore... But do something because your coming off wimpy and clingy to her right now..
celsyus Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 I'm going through something similar to the OP. My advice is to back off and show her that you're still your own man. Still be chivalrous, as this shows respect, but go out with the guys and do what you want more than what you think she wants you to do. This will make your value (in her eyes) go up.
9Lives Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 If you are doing most of the calling, I would have a problem with that. It is like rowing the boat by yourself so to speak. I would just chill out and let her call you. In the meantime, since you SAY you are not clingy..go do your own thang. Needing space this early is kinda weird. I would put another egg in the basket but that just me. I dont trust people. They seem to let you down often.
musemaj11 Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 That's a bit harsh. He only appears clingy because she doesn't seem to feel the same way about him. There is nothing wrong with talking to someone every day that you've been in a relationship with for 3 months. Even husband and wife dont talk on the phone multiple times for hours every time every single day.
TigerCub Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 I'm going through something similar to the OP. My advice is to back off and show her that you're still your own man. Still be chivalrous, as this shows respect, but go out with the guys and do what you want more than what you think she wants you to do. This will make your value (in her eyes) go up. That's defenitely the way to go!!
miracle252 Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 Even husband and wife dont talk on the phone multiple times for hours every time every single day. Yes, unfortunately, husband and wife don’t talk on the phone multiple times. But, for sure there were days, weeks or months before marriage when they were talking every day for hours:love::love:.
Author qinboxmail Posted November 28, 2010 Author Posted November 28, 2010 There isn't much you can do other than give her space. But, do you want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't think of you often and doesn't seem to contact you either? Few years ago she was looking for a boyfriend then she met guys however they were not good to her and she gave up on them and give up on dating until she met me 3 months ago. She now has the feeling of not trusting the guys and afraid to get hurt and stuff. I understand her that's why I'm still with her.
skydiveaddict Posted November 28, 2010 Posted November 28, 2010 girlfriend wants space = girlfriend is history
9Lives Posted November 28, 2010 Posted November 28, 2010 girlfriend wants space = girlfriend is history Can I get a Amen!!!!!!
Sanman Posted November 28, 2010 Posted November 28, 2010 Few years ago she was looking for a boyfriend then she met guys however they were not good to her and she gave up on them and give up on dating until she met me 3 months ago. She now has the feeling of not trusting the guys and afraid to get hurt and stuff. I understand her that's why I'm still with her. That is all well and good. However, that does not give her the right to treat you like dirt for the past sins of others. Not trusting men has nothing to do with the fact that she is not contacting you. That is simply her not wanting to pull her weight in the relationship. You can't force her to trust you and you can't force her to be ready for a relationship.
that girl Posted November 28, 2010 Posted November 28, 2010 There are two possibilities here: 1) She is losing interest or 2) She is just not a phone person Either way, I would limit your calls to once a day. If she sounds grumpy or is busy, tell her she can call you later if she wants and don't obsessively wait by the phone or intentionally let it go to voicemail. Just answer the phone. This isn't going make you "value" go up. What it is going to do is give her some space if she is feeling smothered. Some couples do talk on the phone multiple times a day, if that is what you need this might not be the relationship for you. But if you're stuck in a cycle where you call so much that she feels smothered, calling less can break that leading to better phone calls.
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