Author irc333 Posted November 26, 2010 Author Posted November 26, 2010 That would work unless she's been telling you that she is busy. That's the problem I have. She's always busy, but has the time to flirt with me in texts, phone and online. Pisses me off. So I went no contact. She found me on IM and was all flirty. I think with girls like this you need to back off and let them chase you for awhile. If they don't chase then they never were interested in the first place. And can you believe the girl who is doing this to me is 30? I expect it with girls in their early 20's but someone like her, if she does it to all the guys is going to end up alone someday. Yeah, and if some married couple asks this woman "how come you've been single for so long?" She won't answer them honestly of course. LOL
nice-easy-day Posted November 26, 2010 Posted November 26, 2010 Yeah, and if some married couple asks this woman "how come you've been single for so long?" She won't answer them honestly of course. LOL You're right. What she'll do is blame it on all he guys. I found that to be the case in all my breakups. They always spin it so it looks like they were angels and you were the bad guy. They even did this in relationships where it truly wasn't my fault. At that point, the made stuff up and lied to our mutual friends just so she could save face.
fishtaco Posted November 26, 2010 Posted November 26, 2010 But unlike what you've been experiencing, when a gal friendzones you, she still DOES want to see you, hangout with you, etc. If you've been told that they just want to be friends, and they behave in a manner which tells you that they never want to hear from/see you ever again, you haven't been friendzoned. You've been...LAUNCHED. (Hate that word, but that's what it is.) Yes, judge people by their actions, not their words. But really to me, the term "friendzoned" has more to do with no chance at romance/intimacy than "becoming friends".
phineas Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 That would work unless she's been telling you that she is busy. That's the problem I have. She's always busy, but has the time to flirt with me in texts, phone and online. Pisses me off. So I went no contact. She found me on IM and was all flirty. I think with girls like this you need to back off and let them chase you for awhile. If they don't chase then they never were interested in the first place. And can you believe the girl who is doing this to me is 30? I expect it with girls in their early 20's but someone like her, if she does it to all the guys is going to end up alone someday. I get them playing those games at almost 40. I believe with these women the hot guy their banging don't give them any attention so they seek it from other guys & pretend to like them in order to keep them interested but then get "busy" to avoid meeting with you because like they got a BF.
Star Gazer Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 ....the b*tch snubbed me. I think THIS is your biggest problem. You think to call a woman you've never met a b*tch for not responding to an email.
youngskywalker Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 I get them playing those games at almost 40. I believe with these women the hot guy their banging don't give them any attention so they seek it from other guys & pretend to like them in order to keep them interested but then get "busy" to avoid meeting with you because like they got a BF. That's actually a really good point. Although the girl I was seeing DENIED up and down that she had another guy, I never fully believed her. She may or may not.....who knows. So they still play those games at 40? Wow, by the time I'm 40 I hope I have the balls to launch at the first sign of flakiness. It's very hard to say "no thank you" when you're interested in a girl. I can't do it. But I'm getting better at having good taste in women.... meaning to look at character instead of the other stuff. I'm not there yet, just getting better. It's my own fault I let this relationship get to where it's at now. I should have walked the second week. Now my heart is in it and I feel stuck.
phineas Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 That's actually a really good point. Although the girl I was seeing DENIED up and down that she had another guy, I never fully believed her. She may or may not.....who knows. So they still play those games at 40? Wow, by the time I'm 40 I hope I have the balls to launch at the first sign of flakiness. It's very hard to say "no thank you" when you're interested in a girl. I can't do it. But I'm getting better at having good taste in women.... meaning to look at character instead of the other stuff. I'm not there yet, just getting better. It's my own fault I let this relationship get to where it's at now. I should have walked the second week. Now my heart is in it and I feel stuck. If your single at 40 it's a good chance it's because you are divorced like me. My wife was cheating. My heart is protected & i'm mostly just annoyed by the huge time-suck she became & the lies about wanting me just to keep me talking to her daily. I did get a little attached to her in the beginning but the constant "my life sucks" barrage from her made me not even want to take her calls anymore. The lack of affection from her after a few months did the rest.
dispatch3d Posted November 28, 2010 Posted November 28, 2010 I think half of it is sometimes girls are just checking in to make sure they are the ****. So they flirt with you a little bit to see if they have you, and if they do they pat themselves on the back and continue searching for "the one". That make sense? I guess I sometimes do that sort of thing with girls I'm not interested in, flirt a bit with them to see if they like it or don't. Then if they do I pat myself on the back and carry on. Not really nice. I think ignoring outright flirting is probably the way to go. I've had success with this when a girl who flirting outrageously with all guys I refused to pay any attention to or even talk to. It's like there's enough reward with the returned affection that they don't need anything more from you (you've boosted their self esteem so they continue to be happy).
carhill Posted November 28, 2010 Posted November 28, 2010 Having had and still having a myriad of real life female friends and experiencing decades of incompatible, broken and pseudo-friends, I tend to look at actions to reconcile their intentions with their words. Recognizing the Hoovers is fairly easy. The hard part, IME, for a man, is resolving the attraction to the Hoovers. With a clearly honest and direct female, this is generally not an issue. She, if rejecting romantic overtures and wishing to be 'friends', says words and performs actions to validate that dynamic. Perhaps not coincidentally, such females tend to make the best friends. Such friends sustain my optimism for inter-gender health.
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