Straight Men, would you date a Bi Woman?

[irc333]

....yeah I know you some of you guys would just lavish in the idea....but would it make a difference to some of you or no?

 

Are there stereotypes surrounding bi-sexual women like

 

1. THey aren't really bi-sexual, they just say that (or put it in their dating profiles) to make them sound more appealing?

 

2. They're not really capable of anything long term, much less marraige?

 

3. Men think they'r great for one night stands and if a woman is bi-sexual, she probably wouldn't care if he never returned her calls?

 

4. They are not religious, even some Bi's are atheists

 

5. More exhibitionists (like to show off the body, skin, esp in dating profiles)?

 

6. Prefer women over men

(Suprisingly, I knew this woman that was in an LTR and Long Dist relationship with a straight man, but then I found her on a dating site....saying she was "bi", I didn't know that about her, lol....what threw me was....she had 2 kids and was divorced (has an ex husband - but in this day and age, it shouldn't be a shocker I suppose)

 

7. Most common stereotype of Bisexual women is that they have no problem doing the whole trio thing.

 

 

Not sure if I can list others, but can I confirm these stereotypes, is some of what I listed somewhat on the nose?

Edited November 24, 2010 by irc333

[Tim The Enchanter]

I think would have to think long and hard before getting involved with someone like that. Obviously if it's a casual thing, then no cause for concern, but in terms of a long term relationship, it would make me feel insecure knowing that I have to match up to girls as well as guys. Relationships are complicated enough without adding bisexuality to the mix.

[Andy_K]

I'd have no problems being with a bisexual girl. Some of my past girlfriends have been bisexual. Generally they've made better girlfriends than the straight ones.

 

The only stereotype above I'd consider remotely accurate is #4

[irc333]

I think would have to think long and hard before getting involved with someone like that. Obviously if it's a casual thing, then no cause for concern, but in terms of a long term relationship, it would make me feel insecure knowing that I have to match up to girls as well as guys. Relationships are complicated enough without adding bisexuality to the mix.

 

Yeah, this woman I know personally (but on an acqauaintence level) was in a serious long term (but long distance) relationship with a straight guy in a state far away

 

She has 2 kids (was previously married to a man) so she had an ex-husband....that's what threw me off....then I saw she had a dating profile saying she was "BI", I was like "Wow, that's some new information, lol"

 

Funny, how she always has relationships with men though....at least lately.

 

She's kind of more aggressive and sarcastic, and must be able to handle that (apparently, she sounds like one of the more "roudy" guys you'd see working in a mechanics shop). She has an attraction to successful men, (not because she's lookin for man with money) but successful men tend to have more self-confidence (not sure why not just put, "I like a man with self-confidence, but she prefers to tie-it in with successfulness)

 

But yeah, interesting stuff to know......she was able to even get married, have kids by a husband, but now divorced. DO things that a regular straight woman would do.

 

I figured a TRUE Bi-woman wouldn't touch marriage with a man with a 10 foot pole, lol

[tb24]

I don't know about the stereotypes but being in a relationship with someone and knowing that I couldn't fulfil their sexual needs? I don't know if i could cope with that.

[irc333]

I don't know about the stereotypes but being in a relationship with someone and knowing that I couldn't fulfil their sexual needs? I don't know if i could cope with that.

 

 

So you're saying that Bi women could never have their needs fulfilled?

[welikeincrowds]

Are there stereotypes surrounding bi-sexual women like:

Incredible.

 

Would you like us to discuss stereotypes surrounding black men, next?

 

This thread is trash. Be ashamed of yourself.

[tb24]

So you're saying that Bi women could never have their needs fulfilled?

 

with a single partner? Almost certianly yes.

[irc333]

Incredible.

 

Would you like us to discuss stereotypes surrounding black men, next?

 

This thread is trash. Be ashamed of yourself.

 

Sheesh, one of those types that is always offended easily.

 

Nothing I'm talking about is anything to be ashamed about, in fact, I'm educating myself, I mean it's legit question as to finding out if being involved with a bi-sexual woman would be good for the long-term

[welikeincrowds]

Sheesh, one of those types that is always offended easily.

 

Nothing I'm talking about is anything to be ashamed about, in fact, I'm educating myself, I mean it's legit question as to finding out if being involved with a bi-sexual woman would be good for the long-term

 

No, you've misread me. I'm not offended in the least. Rather, I'm letting you know that your thread is worthless. It's not a "legitimate" question, in the sense that it will help you find romance. Whether or not a woman identifies as bi-sexual is not going to tell you anything other than that she feels sexually attracted to both men and women. Anything beyond that depends on the person in particular; so the best you have is stereotypes, which, as you should know, are as good as ****.

 

The shame part does not come from a state of offense on my behalf. It comes from the fact that you have no excuse for not knowing better. Especially given that you even used the word "stereotype" yourself. This thread needn't exist, but you made it anyway. So carry on, as you will. Waste your time and learn nothing, except what strangers have to say about other strangers with labels.

[Tim The Enchanter]

I thought it was a perfectly reasonable question.

[irc333]

Whatever...............................................

 

 

No, you've misread me. I'm not offended in the least. Rather, I'm letting you know that your thread is worthless. It's not a "legitimate" question, in the sense that it will help you find romance. Whether or not a woman identifies as bi-sexual is not going to tell you anything other than that she feels sexually attracted to both men and women. Anything beyond that depends on the person in particular; so the best you have is stereotypes, which, as you should know, are as good as ****.

 

The shame part does not come from a state of offense on my behalf. It comes from the fact that you have no excuse for not knowing better. Especially given that you even used the word "stereotype" yourself. This thread needn't exist, but you made it anyway. So carry on, as you will. Waste your time and learn nothing, except what strangers have to say about other strangers with labels.

[sally4sara]

In the interest of giving these thread questions some clarity, I think all of the people chiming in about their assumptions should give some personal info to back up where their head is coming from. Because I'm betting the folks who assume the bi girl couldn't be satisfied with one partner are also the the folks that take issue with the person they date staying in touch with exes and/or having platonic friendships.

 

Making their assumption come from a place of insecurity. It wouldn't matter if the person they were dating was bi or straight; their going to feel compared regardless if:

 

the girl is bi

she can still be affable to an ex or exes

she has platonic friendships (and if she finds attraction to both you can't let her have ANY friends! )

 

 

Its a matter of confusion over the sexuality of a woman and little else. And its natural for them to be confused; they've never been a woman let alone a bi woman. They only know that if THEY had twice the opportunity to find people attractive, they'd be screwing twice as much and less likely to settle down quickly. So the judgment isn't about the bi woman so much as it is a judgment of how THEY would be in her shoes.

[tb24]

Because I'm betting the folks who assume ... Making their assumption

 

That's just a non sequitur. You're making an assumption about peoples reasoning to argue against their reasoning. *scratches head*.

[sally4sara]

That's just a non sequitur. You're making an assumption about peoples reasoning to argue against their reasoning. *scratches head*.

 

Then you got the message loud and clear yeah?

 

Beyond that, people DO tend to assume out of others what they would do in the other person's shoes.

 

And for me to assume the concerns others listed in this thread, I would need to be really insecure about being compared to their other experiences, fear not measuring up, AND not like putting much effort into getting to know others as individuals before making a judgments about them.

 

So what about you? Platonic friendships of your person of interest cause you anxiety? Contact with exes make you worry?

[Tim The Enchanter]

 

So what about you? Platonic friendships of your person of interest cause you anxiety? Contact with exes make you worry?

 

Nope. I don't have a problem with platonic relationships, or contact with exes, within reason. Just as most people wouldn't.

[sally4sara]

Nope. I don't have a problem with platonic relationships, or contact with exes, within reason. Just as most people wouldn't.

 

Hmmm, a qualifier.

 

What is within reason?

 

Think about this:

 

If a straight person enters into a monogamous relationship, they still have to forgo any attraction they feel to others to live up to the monogamy expectation. But you really like the female body and getting touch it so maybe that makes it harder for you to believe a bi girl could not act on her attractions when it comes to women?

 

Like you put in, you'd be fine with a girl being bi if you were only casually involved with her. It hints that you idealize a more committed relationship, but will get in there even if it isn't your ideal.

 

So maybe this makes it harder for you to conceive of a bi woman being able to not get in there too.

[OldSkool]

Stereotypes are just that, stereotypes. They have about as much value as the hot air it takes to create them.

 

As an Asian, I have faced my fair share of stereotypes, and even naked prejudice. It no longer makes me angry, just a bit sad that society still has not yet fully evolved.

 

The lady I am dating is bi. I don't have a problem with it (yes, secretly a part of my mind thinks it is kind of hot).

 

But it is so much more than that. We are polar opposites in so many ways. Political views, religious views, dietary habits, social circles.

 

Yet, we connect like I have never connected with women who held the same point of view on life as I do. I love her, and the only thing I think about her being bi is;

 

"I have to work twice as hard to keep this one, because the competition comes from both sides of the gender map."

 

Peace

[Stung]

....yeah I know you some of you guys would just lavish in the idea....but would it make a difference to some of you or no?

 

Are there stereotypes surrounding bi-sexual women like

 

1. THey aren't really bi-sexual, they just say that (or put it in their dating profiles) to make them sound more appealing?

 

2. They're not really capable of anything long term, much less marraige?

 

3. Men think they'r great for one night stands and if a woman is bi-sexual, she probably wouldn't care if he never returned her calls?

 

4. They are not religious, even some Bi's are atheists

 

5. More exhibitionists (like to show off the body, skin, esp in dating profiles)?

 

6. Prefer women over men

(Suprisingly, I knew this woman that was in an LTR and Long Dist relationship with a straight man, but then I found her on a dating site....saying she was "bi", I didn't know that about her, lol....what threw me was....she had 2 kids and was divorced (has an ex husband - but in this day and age, it shouldn't be a shocker I suppose)

 

7. Most common stereotype of Bisexual women is that they have no problem doing the whole trio thing.

 

 

Not sure if I can list others, but can I confirm these stereotypes, is some of what I listed somewhat on the nose?

 

Most people would categorize me as bisexual, as I have dated and had sex with both men and women. I hesitate to label myself as bisexuality means different things to different people. My serious long-term relationships have always been with males, and most of my sexual interest lies with men, it is actually fairly rare for my head to be turned by a woman. But it has happened a handful of times, and I made a move on it each time, and enjoyed the results. I'm actually kind of a chick-magnet and have had straight guy friends envious of my success rates with women.

 

I am absolutely capable of long-term monogamy, and I am happily and monogamously married to a man. I occasionally see a woman I find attractive, just as I occasionally see a man I find attractive--just as I am sure my husband sometimes sees women he finds attractive. I have also never been unfaithful in any of my previous relationships and regard infidelity as a character flaw/sign of weakness.

 

I don't have a big history of one-night stands. I had a one-night stand that turned into a two-year monogamous relationship, and I am still friends with that guy. If I set out deliberately to have a one-night stand, I wouldn't care if the guy didn't call, because I wouldn't give him any way to contact me anyway. If I just ever met a person and the situation spun sexual quickly because we both seemed to feel it and he asked for my number and then never called, of course that would have bothered me.

 

I am not religious, but neither are my completely heterosexual parents or my completely heterosexual husband. I am however pretty well schooled in religious theory and have read several major religious texts. I find comparative religion interesting and have taken a few university courses in it.

 

When I was young and single I showed more skin just because I was young and single and I was into fashion and lived downtown and liked feeling attractive and being approached by people I was attracted to. Now that I am married and live on an island and have young kids, I tend to most often wear jeans and a t-shirt and Chucks. I don't think the fact that I dated women also really ever entered the equation. My dating profile pics were never trashy or half-naked.

 

As previously stated, I generally lean more towards men than women.

 

I've never had a threesome, although I do find the idea of a FMM threesome kind of intriguing. I would definitely not be interested in a FFM threesome with my husband, it would stir up jealousy and mess with my head. Nor will we ever have a FMM threesome as it would stir up jealousy for my husband and mess with his head. Fair's fair.

 

Hope that helped.

[Mad Max]

Dated one before, never again. Any girl I hate must be hetero.

[Stung]

Dated one before, never again. Any girl I hate must be hetero.

 

Freudian slip?

[welikeincrowds]

Dated one before, never again. Any girl I hate must be hetero.

 

Well there's a step up. I didn't realize you discriminated in your hatred of women.

[Feelin Frisky]

Date? No.

 

"Dating" I reserve for those I'd hope to perhaps enter into a monogamous realtionship with.

 

Have a spontaneous sexual encounter with? Yes.

 

I don't care what all else goes on in her mind of minds but if we find ourselves going at it then effen A.

 

Gettin' involved with her and another woman? Probably not. I'm not curious. Hell, I'm not even liberated. When I have sex with someone it's kind of automatically implied that she's making it with me. I like that about sex--we make it about each other. When there's three people we kinda make it about ourselves and 3 is a distracting number that puts me off balance.

 

If we were together and it starts spotanesouly and it flows well, I'd say yes. This is different than laboring over it before hand and having it become sort of staged or ritualized. Depending upon who's involved it can be fluid and enjoyable. If someone I have deep feelings for is involved however, it might bum me out.

[Sanman]

Well, as I have had two relationships with bisexual women and the only thing I can say for sure is that it can make things more complicated. I can tell you that none of those stereotypes is ALWAYS true, but there are certainly things that I can be true of some. One had problems with monogamy and choosing a partner of only one sex. The other was quite happy to be devoted to a partner of either sex. It was more about finding someone she liked. Both struggle with emotional issues, but that is true of many straight people as well. Neither was into threesomes (for different reasons). The bottom line is that it depends on the woman and her definition of bisexuality.

[xpaperxcutx]

I am bisexual but I would never use my sexual orientation to make myself attractive to either gender. I don't see it as a ' previledge' and I certainly don't throw around the title, unless I was specifically asked.

 

I understand there's a alot of stereotypes pertaining to this issue, but I can speak for myself being a bisexual woman does not equate to me being promiscuous.