heavy_1 Posted November 24, 2010 Posted November 24, 2010 Should I move on? This must seem like a negative post but remember I am only including the bad bits I did have good bits in the story of our relationship together but they are irrelevant as what follows is what bothers me: To cut a long story short, met a girl when I was 19 she was 17 great girl everything was well apart from when we use to go out on Saturdays, she would be out with her friends and I would be with mine but we would be in the same club/bar she loves dancing and spent most of her time dancing but she would accept advances from other men and talk with them now normally this would not bother me however she would not spend time with me in the clubs and bars her excuse was she was out with her friends and didn’t have time. Although we did go home together every night it would bother me that she would talk with these men and not spend time with me not even 5mins and we would argue every week about it. Few months went by like this till I got sick of it and started speaking to other women at the club just to see her reaction. She didn’t take kindly to this and decided to dance/grind someone in the club at the time I was young and immature and started a fight with the dude. This led me to be very insecure and not trustworthy of her at all. After this she calmed down but I would always be untrustworthy of her. Let me point out everything else was great. Apart from these issues. Fast forward a year and the arguments got worse due to the trust issues. She had a friend I wasn’t to keen on as she had kissed him before our relationship started over a year ago and he was always lurking about. Another friend would always be texting her and putting I love you in the texts, which I found odd I knew nothing was going on with him and her but I felt that these guys are just crossing the line and she should tell them to tone it down. We had great number of arguments due to this and other jealousy issues let me point out I was very abusive when it comes to our arguments and must have greatly affected her self esteem but I always felt it was her fault the arguments would be there due to the trust issue she created and she would never do anything to win that trust back. Few months went by like this and we eventually broke up her choice, a month went by and we got back in touch and got back together everything was great and I had calmed down till I find out she slept with the guy who she had kissed before our relationship started over a year ago. She said she wanted to get over me as she couldn’t take the pain and she didn’t even like him and that it wasn’t anything to do with me because we broken up but it still hurt me. The relationship carried on for few more months but was sour I started being verbally abusive as I couldn’t forget this till we had a massive argument before she went on holiday and she slept with someone else. She claimed it was over because we said F***k you to each other before she left but we argued every week in this immature manner and she was still texting me when she was on holiday. When she returned and was cold and wanted it over i found out from her what she did and thereafter it was over I was greatly affected by this and my confidence was down in the dumps it took me ages to recover. A year and a bit passed and I thought id never get back with her even though I still thought of her everyday but we bumped into each other after over a year. Started seeing each other again and the passion etc is still there everything in the relationship is awsome now but I cant seem to forget what she did. She is my first love and I guess that’s why I think about her everyday even when we are split. But this is causing problems for me as I am now thinking about what she did in the past more frequently and getting upset and frustrated as I don’t know whether to stay with her or leave her. She is now a lot more mature and I don’t think she would be so hasty in her decisions now as she is 21 and I am 24 I think she did what she did in the past because she was stupid and immature but is it normal for me to not forget. She said I should forget by now and try and make it work because I love her but it just pisses me off? Do I stay with her or do I leave her. I broke up with her yesterday but am doubting my decision, I’ve known her for 5 years now she is kind loving and caring, but this whats happened still pisses me off. Is this normal as it happened 3 years ago and I am starting to think I am going crazy. As when am with her I am very happy everything will be going good and then id watch a movie or something would trigger these memories and ill get pissed off again. I feel I will never find another like her hence why I feel so down when am without her, I miss her much. Thank you for your response
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