iOcean Posted November 23, 2010 Posted November 23, 2010 Hey all...you have been my rock over the last week. Ex and I were in early 30s and lived together, broke up after 2 years...I begged (I know I know)...I proposed (I know I know again, but the reason she broke up with me is she wanted marriage and me to be closer to the church)...long story short, we broke contact for 2 weeks - she then reached out to me via emial (95 emails all together) and then we meet up. Good talk, but right after she goes NC again. She starts seeing someone at her gym (she falls fast per her history) and I went cold turkey NC and have been for 3 weeks. I have questioned many times if NC can only bring them to grow FARTHER from you. It seems it does; but as you all say, NC is not for a second chance, but for me to heal. Regardless, I want the girl back. SO... I get 2 emails in the last two days asking if I can gather her Christmas decorations and get them to her. I have no desire to hold her things, but A.) She asked for this "favor"; I asked for many including to meet and talk and she ignored and B.) I don't want to regress, so I am fearful of replying. C.) If I do not reply, it may anger her more so in the future (say christmas) when I am wanting to talk she will refuse. D.) I can have my friends drop the stuff her (Her original request) but I still feel she will be getting what she wants. I know this sounds childish, but on a side note, it pains me that she may be using the same decorations and such we always used to celebrate with the new guy. Should I respond? At all? in kind? not at all? Thanks LS!
reknown29 Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 tell her you have them in a box for her and she can come pick them up. leave them on the porch when she is on the way.
WTRanger Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 It's her stuff, she needs it back. It is childish to hold onto it. Just do as she requests, you get everything of her's together and have a friend drop it off. You don't even need to reply. Just pack her stuff up, and let the friend deliver it.
Perhaps Posted November 27, 2010 Posted November 27, 2010 Hey all...you have been my rock over the last week. Ex and I were in early 30s and lived together, broke up after 2 years...I begged (I know I know)...I proposed (I know I know again, but the reason she broke up with me is she wanted marriage and me to be closer to the church)...long story short, we broke contact for 2 weeks - she then reached out to me via emial (95 emails all together) and then we meet up. Good talk, but right after she goes NC again. She starts seeing someone at her gym (she falls fast per her history) and I went cold turkey NC and have been for 3 weeks. I have questioned many times if NC can only bring them to grow FARTHER from you. It seems it does; but as you all say, NC is not for a second chance, but for me to heal. Regardless, I want the girl back. SO... I get 2 emails in the last two days asking if I can gather her Christmas decorations and get them to her. I have no desire to hold her things, but A.) She asked for this "favor"; I asked for many including to meet and talk and she ignored and B.) I don't want to regress, so I am fearful of replying. C.) If I do not reply, it may anger her more so in the future (say christmas) when I am wanting to talk she will refuse. D.) I can have my friends drop the stuff her (Her original request) but I still feel she will be getting what she wants. I know this sounds childish, but on a side note, it pains me that she may be using the same decorations and such we always used to celebrate with the new guy. Should I respond? At all? in kind? not at all? Thanks LS! DO NOT. Reply. To her email. Don't even call to confirm anything. Or answer her call. Pack the stuff. Call a friend and let the friend drop it off.
listen_to_me_please Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 DO NOT. Reply. To her email. Don't even call to confirm anything. Or answer her call. Pack the stuff. Call a friend and let the friend drop it off.
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