RickG Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Ok, I have some serious problems and the reason for this post is because I needed to vent and I am hoping for some responses. I have been in a relationship 6 years and just living in the same house with this person for going on 4 years now and I am ready to walk out but mind you I have 2 children with this person. six years into the relationship and she develops a mental illness and I was unaware of it because she did not tell me and she was self medicating with liquor and I would come home daily to a drunk girlfriend and I was clueless as to why she was drinking like that, so after a month I could not handle it anymore so I made her go seek help and then I officially found out that she had a mental illness so she gets medicated by the doctor and things got better for about 3 days and she was back to drinking AGAIN! so then her dad made her admit herself to a hospital for her condition and she was in there for a week and lied to the doctors so they can release her and when she got home the first thing she does is go back to drinking. months has passed and she has continued to drink and refuses to get help and starts hanging out with some bad people and I go to work daily and she was just having a party in my home everyday while I was at work (my children are with my mom when I am at work because I did not trust her to care for my kids while she is drunk) so months later she comes to me and says she is pregnant and swore that the child belonged to me, so after the 9 months the baby was born and the baby ends up to be not my child. so I asked her who's baby is it and she said she did not know then she said she was given a date rape drug and was raped and she does not know who the father is (I DON'T BELIEVE ONE WORD OF IT!). despite everything she has done I still stuck around because I have my children and I do not have custody of them so I have to stay there to make sure that my kids are taken care of however she is still drinking almost 4 years later she had a baby by another man and she is mentally ill and she is a full blown alchoholic! I can't take it anymore! there is alot more to the story in detail but I made it short and brief. Thank you for reading and please share your comments is you have any.
Trovador Posted November 23, 2010 Posted November 23, 2010 I think a lawyer would give you the best advice in the domestic aspects of your problem, like documenting your case, witnesses, medical history, etc, and I don't see gaining custody of your kids would be hard, but you should leave your mate alone, the only way she will ask (and will really want) help is when she reaches bottom and that will never happen if her folks are constantly pampering her and tolerating her excesses... look, if her kids have not being an enough powerful motive to stop her drinking, nothing will do it... Well, at risk of sounding like a goody goody, there is something that can and will help her, but that's something she will have to discover by herself... Good luck, bro, you are in a tough spot, but don't lose your mind, your kids need you now more than ever...
Brandi 2 Posted November 23, 2010 Posted November 23, 2010 I don't know what to say. That is horrible. I want to say that the baby she had that is not yours biologically, well how do you feel about this little baby...this little baby should not be in her care either, but the little baby knows you, do you see what I'm getting at. Could you love a little baby just for that little baby? The baby is your kids half brother/sister. I hope you take this little baby as your own, get custody of your kids and hopefully she will seek intervention...there is a tv show called intervention, call them.
Graceful Posted November 24, 2010 Posted November 24, 2010 You need professional help and advice. This is far too complicated due to the children involved, and her being an unfit parent. You can't live this way, you cannot have your kids in an unsafe environment and you need to get advice for both the legal and mental aspects of detaching yourself from her. You need to get out, but you need to do it properly b/c she is so unstable. If you have an EAP at your job, get some free advice starting there, and / or get a legal referral so you can understand what you need to do in the state where you live. You cannot make any mistakes because you have kids and you need to have custody. Good luck.
Recommended Posts