paleblue Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 I had to dump a really great girl because she snores and I cant sleep - I slept over twice and it happened twice. Sucks!!! I finally meet a girl who has it together, was totally into me, apparently likes sex (We didn't reach the point of having sex yet, even tho we slept in the same bed) and is a great cook. I am sorry but there is nothing worse than being up all night and not being able to sleep due to someones snoring. It drives me ape sh**. How's a guy supposed to get a night's sleep!! She also has two very young children. I am not sure how I feel about that either. She also complains about her ex all the time. Do I want to hear about it?? Not really. Not at all. Mother.
Am4Real Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Interesting predicament. Seems like you're happy about it. That's a good sign!
carhill Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Of the three, the complaining about the ex would be the most worrisome to me. My exW snored like a freight train; earplugs were a simple fix. I wear them when flying too. Sleep like a baby I love kids, so that wouldn't be an issue. Ex'es OTOH, meh.... especially when the dynamic isn't flatline. Good luck
Author paleblue Posted November 22, 2010 Author Posted November 22, 2010 I've never been told I have. That would be like the pot calling the kettle black! She was talking about her ex, excessively I thought. Eyes watered, got somewhat choked up talking about it one time. It did concern me. She complained about his alleged abusive behavior every time we hung out. Apparently they are about a year out from their divorce and still fighting over who gets the kids for what holidays. I like kids too, but when you add that to the mix it was a huge turn off to me I must admit. I have dated women who have children and it was great. The ex was a non-issue /not in the picture. It changes the dynamic completely. Then I don't mind. I guess between complaining excessively about the ex and the snoring is what did it for me. Earplugs.. I tried that a few times in a previous relationship. It still reverberated thru my head. I guess I am a lite sleeper. The only way I can sleep under those circumstances is if I am passed out drunk. Can't do that every night! ha.
carhill Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Yep, I'm a light sleeper too. Back when I had single pane windows country night noises would wake me up all the time. I finally started wearing my total block silicone plugs that I use in the shop when on the machines and they worked like a charm. After getting married and noting my exW's snoring, I simply kept wearing them, after sex of course IMO, and I've seen a lot of divorced couples with kids and have dated single mothers, this one isn't done with her ex yet. Indifference isn't yet in her psychology. She may not want to 'be' with him, but she's still emotionally attached. Not a good prospect if you're looking for a LTR. My exW married her first husband while he was still embroiled with a 'psycho' ex and it eventually cooked up their M too. Oh, if you haven't tried it, try Melatonin; it's a natural sleep aid and I find it allows me to sleep without earplugs and not get awakened by my cat or night noises. Also, a white noise machine can help too. Good luck
Author paleblue Posted November 22, 2010 Author Posted November 22, 2010 Thanks for the tip. I may check into that. I sleep with a fan to drown out noise or I will hear a pin drop out in the kitchen. When I was a kid I had train tracks near my house, the trains put me to sleep. She's a great girl, but I think you are right. It makes sense now. She isn't indifferent yet. Getting choked up talking about him proves that to me. I know she doesnt want to be with him. But they were together over 10 years and had children together! That's huge! It's barely been a year. It took me longer than that to get over my exGF of 4 years and we never did anything. In fact, now that I think about it, they are both still going to some sort of weekly counseling to learn how to get along. She requested this as part of some agreement. The judge agreed and court ordered him to go. Ya, this is still a mess, even if she didn't snore. Back into the dating pool I go. Bah.
hoping2heal Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 I had to dump a really great girl because she snores and I cant sleep - I slept over twice and it happened twice. Sucks!!! I finally meet a girl who has it together, was totally into me, apparently likes sex (We didn't reach the point of having sex yet, even tho we slept in the same bed) and is a great cook. I am sorry but there is nothing worse than being up all night and not being able to sleep due to someones snoring. It drives me ape sh**. How's a guy supposed to get a night's sleep!! She also has two very young children. I am not sure how I feel about that either. She also complains about her ex all the time. Do I want to hear about it?? Not really. Not at all. Mother. So in other words..the kids and the complaints about the ex really turned you off?
hoping2heal Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Thanks for the tip. I may check into that. I sleep with a fan to drown out noise or I will hear a pin drop out in the kitchen. When I was a kid I had train tracks near my house, the trains put me to sleep. She's a great girl, but I think you are right. It makes sense now. She isn't indifferent yet. Getting choked up talking about him proves that to me. I know she doesnt want to be with him. But they were together over 10 years and had children together! That's huge! It's barely been a year. It took me longer than that to get over my exGF of 4 years and we never did anything. In fact, now that I think about it, they are both still going to some sort of weekly counseling to learn how to get along. She requested this as part of some agreement. The judge agreed and court ordered him to go. Ya, this is still a mess, even if she didn't snore. Back into the dating pool I go. Bah. Ah, see I knew this wasn't about the snoring. Sure it can be a real annoyance, but usually a solve-able enough one. You wouldn't dump a completely great girl over her snoring. Well, maybe you would but I won't go into that. So she has a ton of baggage, it is understandable you would not want to try to forge a relationship in that situation.
Author paleblue Posted November 22, 2010 Author Posted November 22, 2010 So in other words..the kids and the complaints about the ex really turned you off? Ah, see I knew this wasn't about the snoring. Sure it can be a real annoyance, but usually a solve-able enough one. You wouldn't dump a completely great girl over her snoring. Well, maybe you would but I won't go into that. So she has a ton of baggage, it is understandable you would not want to try to forge a relationship in that situation. Ya I guess I was just using the snoring as an excuse. I mean ya, it does drive me ape sh** but it can be resolved. Now that Ive talked it out on LS, I realize it was more about her situation with her ex. Kids dont bother me. I've had a couple long term relationships with women who had children. They were fun. But in this particular situation, two young children, 5 and 3, along with two recently divorced parents who still have unresolved emotional issues with each other = Yikes
hoping2heal Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Ya I guess I was just using the snoring as an excuse. I mean ya, it does drive me ape sh** but it can be resolved. Now that Ive talked it out on LS, I realize it was more about her situation with her ex. Kids dont bother me. I've had a couple long term relationships with women who had children. They were fun. But in this particular situation, two young children, 5 and 3, along with two recently divorced parents who still have unresolved emotional issues with each other = Yikes Hey, I do not blame you one bit. I would never put myself in that situation either. Sounds like a recipe for diasaster at this point.
Author paleblue Posted November 22, 2010 Author Posted November 22, 2010 Hey, I do not blame you one bit. I would never put myself in that situation either. Sounds like a recipe for diasaster at this point. Thanks! I guess I dont feel too bad now, beyond the regular up's and down's that go with dating. Glad to see you back. Haven't seen you on for awhile.
hoping2heal Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Thanks I have been pretty busy. LS is a nice way to unwind. You should not feel bad. That is a pretty loaded situation. I love kids but had a strict rule against no dating men with kids. Then mr.hoping2heal came along. Of course, his divorce was long resolved once I came into the picture, if the two of them were going to counselling together once a week, forget it!
Am4Real Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Hard to believe this is a thread about snoring!!!! ;-)
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