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Posted

Jut found out my ex got engaged in the 1 month we have been broken up after three years together.

 

She was rebounding, I guess she got pregnant by this guy and there getting married now. Pretty ****ty situation. She is only 20 years old. The guy is a highschool drop out.

Posted
Jut found out my ex got engaged in the 1 month we have been broken up after three years together.

 

She was rebounding, I guess she got pregnant by this guy and there getting married now. Pretty ****ty situation. She is only 20 years old. The guy is a highschool drop out.

 

omg karma is a b*tch

Posted

That's dreadful. Really. That being said, at leat you're not the one that got her pregnant???

  • Author
Posted

Yeah, hit home really hard. I guess I dodged a bullet, but I just cannot believe this is real. Like she is throwing her life away, I want to save her but I can't . It's beyond my control. The circumstances are absolutely unreal.

 

I'm not 100% sure she's pregnant. I talked to her family about the situation and they said she was not and they would talk to her about this situation. Still, the engagement. Talk about crazy rebound.

 

Guess I'm venting. I just can't believe this is happening. It's like the stuff you think will never happen to you.

 

I guess this makes moving on significantly easier.

Posted

How did you hear about it in the first place? And just curious why are you still talking to her family? And for the record, if she is pregnant then I dont see this as working out but granted at least you wont be paying 18 years child support when he decides to bolt.

  • Author
Posted

I deleted her off my facebook, but I found out through mutual friends. Apparently, she broke the news on her profile and everyone was asking about it. I didn't believe it at first, so I asked to see. There were comments she made to her friend about the engagement and wedding plans. Also, a friend congratulating her.

 

As for her family. Normally, I would never cross that line. The guy that's involved is a high school drop out and sells drugs. He is leaving in two weeks for about a year. They dated four years ago and she used to complain about him being violent towards her. The entire situation is completely unrealistic and spells disaster. When I dumped her, she rebounded with this guy (within 2 weeks of her being dumped).

 

While we were broken up and she was rebounding, she told me she was scared and still loved me, but she was afraid that he would propose to her and she didn't want to marry him.

 

I reached out to one of her family members out of concern. It wasn't really my place, but I knew I would regret it if I didn't try something. I felt like she needed guidance, not from me but her family and I knew it was likely that she was keeping this a secret. I told them that she needed help and that drugs may be involved and that she needed some real direction in her life. The concern was mutual. I apologized for calling because it "wasn't my place" and was told not to worry about it and thanked.

 

I think this may have been one of those rare cases where NC may have backfired. My ex is extremely codependent and it was the main reason I broke things off. I still love her, but I wanted her to be more independent. I had no idea it would play out like this. Looking back at our relationship, I'm starting to think that this may actually be a girl that needs professional help. There were many signs that bothered me, but I always ignored because the truth was inconvenient. Now I feel horrible for how I broke things off and for not taking action sooner =/ .

Posted
The guy that's involved is a high school drop out and sells drugs.

 

Normally I would not care but I have to step in. I am a high school drop out. I have my GED, I also have computer certifications and now I am working on my criminal justice classes to become a police officer. Please don't label people by their education, its just not right. I understand the drugs part but I do technical support and I listen to people all day who cant figure out computer basics and these people have doctrines in various medicines.

 

Regardless, she is gone and off to travel down a new road which as you point out will be full of mistakes. But it's obvious that she could not make up her mind so I would be happy that you dont have to deal with that.

  • Author
Posted

Thanks, I didn't mean to be elitest and I value your response.

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