ocatherine Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 Please tell me I'm not alone... is anyone else sitting in front of their computer constantly refreshing their email or checking their phone for missed calls/text messages instead of out enjoying the weekend?
Scott Clifford Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 Please tell me I'm not alone... is anyone else sitting in front of their computer constantly refreshing their email or checking their phone for missed calls/text messages instead of out enjoying the weekend? Yes, eventhough she broke up.
Nightsky Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 You are not alone. Many people are going through the exact same situation and feelings you describe. I’ve felt like this and the only thing that made it better was time. Hang in there, eventually it starts getting easier.
Dorian85 Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 (edited) get out there and live your life. I gotta agree with Durnkadurka on this one Life is too short to be wallowing around in pity, pity for yourself, him, the situation....not saying that you are doing any of that lol., Im just saying that yes the emotions are fresh, and its hard to get through at the moment. But you will realize as days go on that there are going to be plenty of opportunities to meet new people out there...but the only way to find that out..... IS TO MEET NEW PEOPLE!!! so chin up. Call up some friends, and go to a bar, or just hang out..sometimes the healing process is made easier by listening to other friends share their tales of woe...like they say, misery loves company lol. But sometimes that helps, hearing that other people go through the same stuff, and are still living life. Anyways, Life begins again for you now. Now go enjoy it! Edited November 20, 2010 by Dorian85
SimonSerenade Posted November 21, 2010 Posted November 21, 2010 Your not alone dude, It's natural to want to stay in by yourself at hard time's like this, Take all this at your own pace, It'll get better.
HeartOnSleeve Posted November 21, 2010 Posted November 21, 2010 Please tell me I'm not alone... is anyone else sitting in front of their computer constantly refreshing their email or checking their phone for missed calls/text messages instead of out enjoying the weekend? You are sooooo not alone. I spent most of last weekend doing the same thing and this week decided to get off my butt and see friends, go a on date or two to get my mind off. Sure enough the guy texts me, and now that is messing with my head! How I cope with "waiting": I will turn my phone on silent and put it in my purse (as long as nothing major or urgent is happening) and that way I am not expecting the phone to ring etc. Trust me it helps to get the sound off and the phone out of your hands. Shut off you email and stay away from your computer. Even if I don't want to go out...I put a nice big fake smile and just go...go to the gym, out with friends, to the dog park...ANYWHERE is better than no where!
Author ocatherine Posted November 21, 2010 Author Posted November 21, 2010 You are sooooo not alone. I spent most of last weekend doing the same thing and this week decided to get off my butt and see friends, go a on date or two to get my mind off. Sure enough the guy texts me, and now that is messing with my head! Wow, how crazy is this... I posted on your forum (albeit playing the devils advocate) and I discover that you have posted on mine! So what is up with you girl? I read that you got a response... so what's holding you back? Was it that he didn't respond in a way that you wanted to hear and/or felt you deserved? Because if that is the case, then I totally get it! Just as an FYI, my story is complicated and I have yet to post it, but I'm on day 4 of NC and he's already sent me an email. Nothing at all indicative of the rules of NC and thus not worthy of my response. My problem at this point is "holding back" and not retaliating... Like I said, my situation is different.
HeartOnSleeve Posted November 21, 2010 Posted November 21, 2010 Haha.... great "posts" think alike! NC is so complicated and frustrating. So in your situation you are having a hard time not responding to his contact? becuase he keeps contacting you, and you are doing your best not to initiate the back and forth? Would be interesting to hear your story, but understand if you not ready to put it up yet. With my guy, we stopped dating about a week ago and I was expecting NC for a while, but still went a little "stir crazy" thinking we would come to our senses...lol. The week went on and nothing, but I also, knew he was travelling all week and that it was pretty much done. So when I am least expecting it, I get a short little text. "Hope your doing good!"- I mean what is that...it's not a question...it's not really an "I'm thinkign about you" text. It was just not what I was expecting I guess. I just really don't know how to respond to that text. So yeah maybe I feel as thought I deserve more.
Eeyore79 Posted November 21, 2010 Posted November 21, 2010 You're not alone - I've been through the exact same experience myself. It's utterly soul destroying constantly clicking the Refresh button and wondering what they're doing that's so much more important than contacting you. It makes you feel rejected and miserable All I can say is, someone who really cares about you won't put you through that. There are people out there who will make an effort to stay in touch with you, and who will make you feel wanted and happy instead of rejected. I finally cut the ties with Mr "I-Can't-Be-Bothered-To-Stay-In-Touch-With-You", and now I have a nice boyfriend who contacts me every day, replies in a timely fashion, and makes an effort to see me.
shocked_confused Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Please tell me I'm not alone... is anyone else sitting in front of their computer constantly refreshing their email or checking their phone for missed calls/text messages instead of out enjoying the weekend? Heyy, you are definitely now alone. I spent my friday night doing all that and being sad...My bf broke up with me after 6 years, saying he didn't want to settle down yet and wants to explore his new life alone (he just moved across the country a month ago). Anyway, I understand what your going through. it's tough. But you literally have to force yourself to get out there even if you don't want to. Yesterday i forced myself to go out shopping, then went to Borders to get some books and coffee. However, when I went to Borders i felt this huge wave of nostalgia because they were playing christmas music and had decorations up. *sigh* this christmas is gonna be tough..... Anyway, good luck, the only thing i can say is keep yourself as busy as you can. Reading has helped me as well,
shocked_confused Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Heyy, you are definitely now alone. I meant NOT alone, lol.
KLM10 Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 Please tell me I'm not alone... is anyone else sitting in front of their computer constantly refreshing their email or checking their phone for missed calls/text messages instead of out enjoying the weekend? I have been there before..holding my cell phone in my hand all night balled up in a corner waiting for that call/text..it hurts deeply but it will get better over time..obviously they're out enjoying their life so you will realize that you need to be out and enjoying the time you have left in this life as well b/c its too short...just don't blow their phone up because eventually you will get a call..
Nkognito Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 I have been there before..holding my cell phone in my hand all night balled up in a corner waiting for that call/text..it hurts deeply but it will get better over time..obviously they're out enjoying their life so you will realize that you need to be out and enjoying the time you have left in this life as well b/c its too short...just don't blow their phone up because eventually you will get a call.. Good post but yes, I have to inquire because I see this far too often, and it would be nice to have a collective thread on the subject of dumper call backs. I know it's out of ego and to make sure you're not on suicide watch but it's funny that they do come back.
librooks Posted November 22, 2010 Posted November 22, 2010 I think they finally contact you just so they stay on your radar. They don't want to cut ties completely because they may decide to change their mind at some point in the future, or may want a booty call next week, or feel guilty about hurting you, or whatever. But what they're NOT doing is saying, "Hey, can we get together and talk about things? Let's figure this out." Instead, it's usually a one-liner like, "Hey, what's up?" In other words, non-committal. Which is exactly what you don't want. You see that he or she texted and all of a sudden you're hopeful, and then you see the one line and you start wondering, "What does he/she mean?" and start analyzing, and the cycle continues. It's a losing game, so just ignore it. As a result, YOU now have the upper hand. YOU are not returning the text. And HE is left wondering why.
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