victoria.v Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 I think my situation is a bit more complicated, but I'll try to explain what happened. We were in a some sort of LDR and because of the time difference, we talk online while he's at work, and I'm already at home. I'm posting this in the "breaking up" section, because we're in the middle of something like this - things are very unclear and a some sort of "break" between us is obvious. A month ago he told me that probably he should stop talking to me while he's at work, because sometimes I'm a distraction for him and that I can't understand when he's busy. I thought this was very strange, because one week before, I've asked him if I'm bothering him while he's working, and he said "nope" and that I'm just imagining things. Oh well... This week went like this: Monday he was very nice, we talked, he was ok. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday I contacted him. He told me he was extremely busy and barely talked to me. Thursday I felt extremely unwell (health related), and he didn't even ask what's wrong. Yesterday (Friday) I was online, then because of the meds I took, I accidentally fell asleep. I woke up one hour before he was suppoed to leave from work... and I saw that he didn't even bother to tell me "hi"... or "hi, I'm busy today, do you feel better?" I told him that, and he tried to blame it on me. He said I'm being too clingy and that I can't assume by myself that he's busy, that I haven't contacted him either and so on. He asked me (while seeming very surprised) since when I am afraid to contact him... probably he forgot what he told me a month ago I tried to explain him this, but he said I'm exhausting and that he'll sign off IM, so he won't mislead me any further. And that's exactly what he did. The things is, I've called him to ask him why he had to leave like that because I wasn't having a fight with him... but he rejected 3 of my phone calls. I woke up early this morning (I knew he's not sleeping) and I called him again. He rejected my phone call (I mean... I don't even know what he's doing with his phone - the phone is ringing once or twice, and then I hear his voice mail message). I sent him a message telling him that all I wanted was to talk to him, and that he can answer because I have no credit left on my phone, and each time he doesn't answer I have to pay a lot. Now... I don't know what to do. On one side I want to leave him alone until Monday (when he'll be at work... and I wanna ask him then if he can answer the phone) but on the other side I'm super worried, I wanna talk to him and I'm afraid I'll break down and call him again... Argh! What should I do? P.S. - I'll return later with post that should explain our "relationship" better. Thanks for reading.
Dorian85 Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 Hey Victoria. I wouldn't worry too much about it. Being a guy who has a pretty stressful and hectic job myself, if i allow myself to become distracted @ work, it can seriously screw my work day up. Not saying that you are a distraction at all, just saying that I see where he may be coming from. But that still doesn't give him any right to be angry with you over something that isn't your fault. And if he is too stubborn to hear you out, then maybe he needs to learn how to listen in your relationship. Or at least learn how to return a damn phonecall when his g/f wants to speak with him. Anyways, Stress sometimes makes guys act like we are out of our minds. Trust me. I've said things to past g/f's when I was stressed out that I would have NEVER said in any other circumstance. ie) being very short and rude with them, fighting over small things, etc.... Im sure hes just going through a rough patch at work and is taking a lot out of it on you. I did the same thing the my past g/f's, and I realized I was being an A-hole for doing so. He just needs to realize that if he is stressed out, he needs to take it out on a squeeze toy or something else like that. And as for not returning your calls or ignoring you. You have to address that with him ASAP. Because washing your hands of a situation thats upsetting you at the moment, and not dealing with it head on is a bad thing to do. It'll only come out in later arguments and get blown up 10x worse then if you just dealt with it then. anyways, thats my 2 cents hope it helps.
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