Happy finally about being single!

[Lucky555]

Not dating yet but I'm happy to be happy about enjoying life as a singleton!I'm just sharing when u reach this point life is great! Before I met my ex I felt like i was full of sunshine!!! After the breakup days were gloomy and since I have been ignoring him in feel less baggage more freedom and i smile! It's nice knowing I can recover to eventually open my heart again and hopfully always keep the sunshine i radiate when I enjoy life. I will not accept scraps or poor attention or be used. I just reach this point it's good and even though time la are tough in find I'm laughing more and more

 

My wish for daters find the happiness and hopefully your dream person will be drawn to you!

[Room]

Yesterday, my colleagues and I read news about the divorce of Tony Parker & Eva Longoria. I was laughing and I told them I was so happy. They all said " you're weird. Why are you happy?". I replied since they're now single. I have two more friends. .

 

A lot of people are wondering why I am still single even with this age. (although I have two secret guys chasing for me at this time haha). Happiness is the most important thing. Marriage, being in a relationship, or being single doesn't matter. Live the way that makes you ( or us) happy.

[Lucky555]

I'm happy in the sense that I'm not dealing with the ex. And that I'm realizing how much more I deserve.such as being with someone who can be there for me and makes time for me. I'm happier being single to enjoy life and if I happen to meet someone who wants to enjoy life with me. I'm happy being single doing things on my time and not worried. I just feel like being single is a fresh breath of air and the opportunies are endless. I'm going to be myself and if someone can't see me for me then it's ok. I just think being single for myself right now is refreshing

[spice4life]

I'm happy in the sense that I'm not dealing with the ex. And that I'm realizing how much more I deserve.such as being with someone who can be there for me and makes time for me. I'm happier being single to enjoy life and if I happen to meet someone who wants to enjoy life with me. I'm happy being single doing things on my time and not worried. I just feel like being single is a fresh breath of air and the opportunies are endless. I'm going to be myself and if someone can't see me for me then it's ok. I just think being single for myself right now is refreshing

 

I'm in the same place you are and it feels great. I find that I'm in no hurry either. I want just enjoy it for what it is for now. It feels nice to not want or need a relationship .. it also feels nice just looking forward to the possibilities.

 

Good for you!

[green_tea]

I'm sure the reality of your happiness is more masking than true happiness.

 

Are you saying it's impossible to be truly happy being single? Because I definitely don't believe that.

 

I too am very happily single right, it took me about 1.5 years to get over this one guy, but I finally made it, and I actually have never been happier. Yes I would like to find someone, but if I don't, that actually is fine with me.

[Lucky555]

My ex could not stand when I was happy. I have a view of hope. I believe people can accomplish anything they set their mind too. I have never had an easy life but I think the struggles I have had don't even compare to relationships I have had. Relationships have hindered me more like this past one. I kept thinking he deserves another chance and broke my heart so many times it was my fault for letting him back in. This time I feel different. I feel like the more I take care of my self and enjoy the things I want to do the more of a chance I have at meeting the right guy for me. In the past guys didn't enjoy what I enjoy arts, horses, wine, exploring the wilderness, kayaking, or even just a nice time playing a game. I'm an optimist I can see good things in the not so happy parts of my life. However I'm happy just to see the sun shine or sit in the sun on a beach.. I have not found anyone who can be content with just these aspects. I know we only live once and I try to absorb the beauty around me. I'm very ambitious career wise but for me to be simply at peace and happy I like enjoying these things. I guess over time while I stopped dwelling on the relationship of trying to understand it I started rediscovering things I needed to do..which led me to the conclusion that my ex was never happy with what I enjoyed, he never wanted to do things I enjoyed, and he was pretty negative. Many times I would be exited to tell him something and then he would make a negative comment crushing my happiness. So it did take some time but now I feel as though "bless him" and his life I don't have to live that way and I gave my best. It's not like I gave up.. He gave up when he decided to include his ex gf in his life when he knew it made menuncomfortable I knew did some horrible things and as I thought I couldn't let her be involved in a life I wanted with him. I know I saw a future with this guy and though If we had kids I would want them in danger. Also the lack of willingness to be a participant in the relationship was enough for me to be like wait got to stop his contact he is really fulfilling his ego.

Really I just feel like laying under a nice sun enjoying a glass of wine. And like I said I have hope my hope, faith in myself,and ambitions got me far in life.

I don't have a lack of interests in me but I'm looking for someone who can be there when I want to share my day, someone who does encouge me, listens, would join me in one of my interests, make time, and have ambitions for himself. Just have learned a lot from the pasts for what I want in my future.

People like my ex just tried to suck the energy out of me and them when they feel good they start hitting on other women..he lacked self confidence, self esteem and hade ex syndrome. I was never number one for him. Everytime I left he came back just was a cycle which I don't want to be apart of it just feels good not listening to him or being sucked back in by his charm. I just feel more confident in my choice after experiencing a time frame of 6 months chatting back and forth with him and realizing wow we just are not connectin.

 

So yes I'm happy. I know my life is not perfect but I'm content with it and in keeping motivated. I also just enjoy what I do withoutthe baggage feeling!! I'm free!!!

[Surrealist]

I understand your point. But if you never let people walk all over you and hinder your lifestyle all this time, you wouldn't have this over amplified happiness going on right now.

 

You are using the happiness as a crutch to smother all the bad stuff from the past.

 

As I said, there nothing wrong with it, its healthy, but I just made the comment about it.

 

Which most people on here seem to think I'm not allowed to do. They tend to think people arent allowed to have different views than theirs, or any sort of open-mindedness on this site at all.

 

Are you suggesting that by being in a relationship you should be happier? Maybe I'm not following you here, but being in a relationship certainly does not always mean a happier person. Maybe if you have a great relationship sure, but a great relationship takes effort on both sides, its not some happy pill.

[alexandria35]

Not dating yet but I'm happy to be happy about enjoying life as a singleton!I'm just sharing when u reach this point life is great! Before I met my ex I felt like i was full of sunshine!!! After the breakup days were gloomy and since I have been ignoring him in feel less baggage more freedom and i smile! It's nice knowing I can recover to eventually open my heart again and hopfully always keep the sunshine i radiate when I enjoy life. I will not accept scraps or poor attention or be used. I just reach this point it's good and even though time la are tough in find I'm laughing more and more

 

My wish for daters find the happiness and hopefully your dream person will be drawn to you!

 

Great post! I understand where you are coming from completely. I went through a bad break up last year and at first being alone and single was very painful for me. Sometimes the loneliness would get so hard that I would think about just going out and latching on to whomever would have me, but I knew doing that wasn't really going to fix anything and may in fact lead to even more unhappiness later on. I knew I had to set things right with myself and find my own joy and happiness before I could be truly happy with someone else. Now here I am, almost a year on and I feel so much better. I rarely get lonely anymore, I see my friends and my family frequently and when I'm alone I enjoy my own company. I'm not dating yet either, just not quite ready yet and since I am having fun being single, I'm not in a hurry.

 

You are using the happiness as a crutch to smother all the bad stuff from the past.

 

Lol...something about that sentence tickles my funnybone. Sounds like you are chiding the OP for being happy...kind of like "stop being so happy and give into the misery that I know you are masking" lol... I guess I could see your point if the OP was coming here and lying about being happy, pretending to herself and everyone else that she is happy when she really isn't. I didn't see anything in her post that would lead me to believe that she is faking her happiness or that the happiness she feels is masking other things. I think she has reached a point where she feels strong and emotionally healthy which is a nice place to be. I certainly think that you are allowed to express a different view and really, I don't think anyone has said you can't, at least not in this thread.

[Lucky555]

I didn't let the guy control me. I thought give it a chance I either will be in a healthy and happy relationship or I wouldn't. I'm not use my happiness as a crutch. I was not addicted to the guy like being on drugs that is completely different. I know what crutches are.. A long time ago I used to find a so called rebound to get over a breakup but never healed that's a crutch.

 

What I am referring to is a happines with my self, decisions, and love life choices. I have had plenty of time to get to this point referring to emotional and physical loss. However I don't feel as though I lost anything now because I did my best an I had given him a chance. If I had just not dove in and embraced life with a good potential guy I would have felt differently.

 

I just have no loving feelings like I was once did. I'm aware of all the psychology and aspects of humans as I am a nerd for that kind of stuff and that's what my career is geared toward analyzing humans. Now I don't think I could have reached this point without having the knowledge thy I have, I guess it'd more so I understand why things are the way they are. I can't force love or change anyone and that's ok! . I'm not looking for that I just know I wan someone who is most compatible with me. If it takes me awhile so it does, If I never have kids I'm on with it. I enjoy friends and family and doing things I like to do.

I know relationships take effort and people who don't want to put effort don't really last in a relationship. I know it's a mutual understanding between two people and if I find it great if not that's ok. I'm happy by simple things in life and I work hard to having things that cost

Money.

 

I do value the opinions of other posters but when I say I happy being single i am. I feels like I'm opening my door to unknown fabulous opportunities and I feel as though dating could eventually be fun again! Dating should be fun! I hope my broken roads lead me to someone great! I'm an opptimist!