aimeeg Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 So here's the deal. Me and my boyfriend have been together for one year. I lost my virginity to him on our four month anniversary. I am seventeen so, I know I made a mistake, and we did it too soon. He's honestly the PERFECT guy, he has southern hospitality, he always compliments me, and is always the greatest thing to me. But we spend so much time together. But for the last couple of months, I've been so moody about what I want anymore. He's all I could need but part of me is unsure.. and I don't know why. Because if anyone is the bad one in the relationship it's me because I'm not as nice as he is. Is there anything I can do to alter my mind about me, or why am I doing this? I want us to be okay and be fixed.
dolce Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 Honestly, it sounds like you're just going through natural emotions of being young and trying to figure out what you want, need and value in a relationship. Totally normal, but probably confusing as it seems like this is your first serious relationship so these emotions are most likely new to you. Also, you've been dating for a year and probably falling into a sort of relationship routine so that fun, exciting honeymoon phase is fading away and you're dealing with a real relationship and that means dealing with the good AND the bad unfortunately. It's just a matter of it the good outweighs the bad and if you're willing to deal with the negative aspects of the relationship (there will ALWAYS be negatives). I believe that if you're happy more than you're sad in the relationship that it's worth staying in!
Surrealist Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 Good thing you are looking at yourself and seeking help with it. That suggest to me you have less wrong with you than you think. For someone of your age, that demonstrates some maturity in the situation. I agree with the above advice, is pretty good too.
Author aimeeg Posted November 19, 2010 Author Posted November 19, 2010 Honestly, it sounds like you're just going through natural emotions of being young and trying to figure out what you want, need and value in a relationship. Totally normal, but probably confusing as it seems like this is your first serious relationship so these emotions are most likely new to you. Also, you've been dating for a year and probably falling into a sort of relationship routine so that fun, exciting honeymoon phase is fading away and you're dealing with a real relationship and that means dealing with the good AND the bad unfortunately. It's just a matter of it the good outweighs the bad and if you're willing to deal with the negative aspects of the relationship (there will ALWAYS be negatives). I believe that if you're happy more than you're sad in the relationship that it's worth staying in! I think you convinced me to give us hope haha thanks. But no, I was in a previous serious relationship, one that lasted almost two years. But with my ex boyfriend, he lived about an hour from him so I only saw him on the weekends while with my boyfriend now we see each other every day all the time. The positives do outweigh the negatives so that's good, I just need to try to relax. What can I do to get over this obstacle?
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 You're seventeen. It's normal. Your tastes and preferences are changing, you are changing. It's likely this is not the guy you'll be with for the rest of your life; not because there's anything wrong with him (or you), but because you will naturally change as you grow into an adult. The boyfriend I had when I was 17 was a great guy, but if given the chance I wouldn't date him now. The qualities I found attractive in him then have faded or changed, and the qualities that I look for in a mate have changed.
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