amarie2011 Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 Hi there, I'm new to the forum..heres my story...my boyfriend broke up with me a few weeks ago, after 7 months of being together, we talked the night after our breakup and he said he hated not getting to see me and loved me too much, after that night we text everyday and he would still tell me he loves me before saying goodnight, then we talked on the phone again and had a really good conversation, then I didn't hear from him at all until I finally text him a week later and he said his phone had been lost which I don't really believe,and he said he would never let anything like that happen again..that day he asked me what I was doing that night and I told him out with some friends and when he asked what friends and I told him he didn't know them, so I didnt text him for a few hours and when I text him he questioned who I had been with and said that if I hook up or do anything with another guy that he would be through after that we eneded up talking on the phone and he said if I ended up doing anything with someone that I should tell him and all this other stuff, I told him I wasn't obligated to tell him anything and that he is no longer on the top of my priority list to give him updates on my life since he broke up with me, after that he brokedown crying saying how he loved me so much and that he let everything with school get to him and he jsut needs time and once he knows he is going to for sure graduate that we may get back together, and I told him I hope he isn't giving me false hope and he said he wouldn't lead me on like that if it wasn't going to happen and I then said if we don't get back together that I wouldn't be able to be friends and speak to him at all because I can't be friends with someone I'm in love with then he started crying again saying that he never wants to lose me and that he loves so much, so we talked for a few hours that night about everything, and continued to text for a few days..I was the first one to text which I know is dumb on my part so we talked this past saturday and he said love you again before saying goodnight like usual and I haven't heard from him since..he won't talk to me unless I initiate contact first, he always texts me back right away so I don't really think he is talking to me just to be nice but I've been reading online saying to not contact so I really don't know what to do..He is younger than me is really confused as to what he wants out of life and I was his first everything..love..etc..I feel like he is waiting for me to contact him because thats the type of person he is..this is my first real break up so I'm really confused on what to do and how long I should keep the NC if he doesn't end up contacting me at all? Any advice would be great! Thank you.
forestofcheem Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 nc always works. even if you want him back or you don't. it's not fair to yourself to let me hold on to you after a break up
Chance_taker Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 Typical dumper they don't want you but they don't want anyone else to have you either. Move on with your life like you're not getting back together and 1 of 2 things will happen. 1) He will pull his head out of his a$$ and decide he wants to truly committ to you and you guys may reconcile or what most likely will happen 2) You will decide he's too immature from his actions and you deserve better than that not want him anyways. Good luck and keep us posted.
Yaz Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 Typical dumper they don't want you but they don't want anyone else to have you either. Move on with your life like you're not getting back together and 1 of 2 things will happen. 1) He will pull his head out of his a$$ and decide he wants to truly committ to you and you guys may reconcile or what most likely will happen 2) You will decide he's too immature from his actions and you deserve better than that not want him anyways. Good luck and keep us posted. That's the scary bit: realising you don't want the love of your life anymore. I fear that moment. Good luck, whatever happens! No contact, ignore him etc. etc. If he wants you back, he'll put some real effort into it, uninitiated by you.
Palm Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 If he wants you back, he'll put some real effort into it, uninitiated by you. It ALWAYS boils down to this. Always. Without fail. Trust your gut, stop speaking to him for a while. For a long while. And when you have those hard days when you want to break down and contact him, make a conscious decision to not do so. Come on here and rant about it, put in headphones and take a walk until the feeling passes, shower, anything. Just stay strong.
J Wool Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 It ALWAYS boils down to this. Always. Without fail. Trust your gut, stop speaking to him for a while. For a long while. And when you have those hard days when you want to break down and contact him, make a conscious decision to not do so. Come on here and rant about it, put in headphones and take a walk until the feeling passes, shower, anything. Just stay strong. I agree, been there before but I fight the feeling and maintain NC.
Author amarie2011 Posted November 19, 2010 Author Posted November 19, 2010 I still haven't contacted him so 7 days NC so far..I'm handling it better than I thought, I only really start thinking about him late at night since I'm usually busy throughout the day so thats when it gets hard but I know I can do it..It is weird how you start to not even want them back anymore when you arent contacting them because I'm already starting to feel this way. Thanks for the replies! I will keep posting on here as time progresses and if I start to get tempted..Thanks again.
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