Taucher Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 So I been on LDR for a week now (I know, pathetic). I am learning, I think. I think I handled it quite well at first but then, from Monday onward, I think I have been quite difficult for my poor SO. THe story is, Since Sunday, I have had flu. I mean, really nasty like I have NEVER had before. I am still nowhere near better and have been signed off work all week. But, I havent left my flat since Sunday. I think this has contributed to me going weird. I just sit around and think alot. So I have started to be paranoid, jelous and all sorts of negative things. I have started not to trust her and stupidly I cannot stop myself from being like this when talking to her. I realise its not going to help but I find it hard to stop. She's done nothing to make me feel this. Will these feelings die down?? T
folieadeux Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 Hang in there T, I think you being under the weather and stuck at home is making things a lot worse. I know for me, having too much time on my hands can drive me downright crazy. Stay busy and focus on getting well. Being in an LDR is never easy; some days are just better than others. But whatever you do, you can’t take it out on each other because that will only make things worse than they are now. I know you know that intellectually, but you just have to resist doing that when you’re speaking to each other.
hoping2heal Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 So I been on LDR for a week now (I know, pathetic). I am learning, I think. I think I handled it quite well at first but then, from Monday onward, I think I have been quite difficult for my poor SO. THe story is, Since Sunday, I have had flu. I mean, really nasty like I have NEVER had before. I am still nowhere near better and have been signed off work all week. But, I havent left my flat since Sunday. I think this has contributed to me going weird. I just sit around and think alot. So I have started to be paranoid, jelous and all sorts of negative things. I have started not to trust her and stupidly I cannot stop myself from being like this when talking to her. I realise its not going to help but I find it hard to stop. She's done nothing to make me feel this. Will these feelings die down?? T T, you need to get a grip right now. I am sure the feelings you are having are arousing becasue you are scared ****less of losing her and what the future of you two is, now that she has not passed the exam. As I said, chin up and brain on. You can sit around feeling bad and giving into all kinds of terrible thoughts and feelings (as you have been doing) and drive yourself utterly mad, or you can start brainstorming and figure out what is next, what is plan B, what should be done.
Author Taucher Posted November 18, 2010 Author Posted November 18, 2010 Hang in there T, I think you being under the weather and stuck at home is making things a lot worse. I know for me, having too much time on my hands can drive me downright crazy. Stay busy and focus on getting well. Being in an LDR is never easy; some days are just better than others. But whatever you do, you can’t take it out on each other because that will only make things worse than they are now. I know you know that intellectually, but you just have to resist doing that when you’re speaking to each other. You are so right. I am getting better and I went for a walk this morning and already my thinking has improved. And yes, even if I have doubts, I need to keep them to myself. T, you need to get a grip right now. I am sure the feelings you are having are arousing becasue you are scared ****less of losing her and what the future of you two is, now that she has not passed the exam. As I said, chin up and brain on. You can sit around feeling bad and giving into all kinds of terrible thoughts and feelings (as you have been doing) and drive yourself utterly mad, or you can start brainstorming and figure out what is next, what is plan B, what should be done. Thanks. I needed a verbal slap! Yes, recently I am scared of losing her but I guess it takes time to adjust to going from a close relationship to an LDR. At the moment we speak on Skype every evening and stay on messenger for hours also. She also tells me she loves me and emails and stuff and yet I'm still having these feelings. I cant be cross with her in any way. We are working on Plan B! T
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