Mountain_Girl Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 Hi all, I really need your help. I've been dating a guy for about 6 months now, all long distance. We're both in our mid-20's. He's a really sweet, thoughtful, nice guy, but we just aren't clicking like we were before. It's time to end things, but I don't know how exactly. The thing is, he still acts crazy about me--talking about moving to my city next year, telling me he loves me, making plans to fly back here soon.... So I can't say this is a mutual breakup. As a matter of principle I've always broken up in person, and since my bf hasn't done anything wrong I think it's doubly important to be as kind as possible. Our next time together is over Thanksgiving weekend. I fly into his city on Thursday afternoon, then we're supposed to have T-day dinner with some of my extended family (who happen to live in a nearby suburb) and my mom (who's flying from another city for the same weekend). It would be the first time he meets my mom, which is a pretty big deal for both me and my bf. So it seems incredibly misleading to have him come to dinner with us then break up later that weekend, but it also seems incredibly cruel to break up with him T-day afternoon & leave him all alone for Thanksgiving (his family doesn't live nearby). So, do I break up with him: a) On the phone, asap b) On Thanksgiving afternoon, when I fly to see him c) After T-day dinner I really don't want to hurt this guy. He doesn't deserve it, and I'm hoping some other people going through a long-distance relationship could offer insight nobody else would have.
Eeyore79 Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 Yes, it would be very bad to have him to Thanksgiving dinner and introduce him to your mom, then break up with him. It would also be pretty cruel to break up with him that afternoon and leave him all alone for Thanksgiving. I think the best approach is to break up with him on the phone asap. I know you would prefer to do it in person, and I respect you for that, but in an LDR it isn't always possible. It's better to break up with him on the phone than to put him through the ordeal of breaking up with him on Thanksgiving. At least then he can make his own arrangements for the holidays.
folieadeux Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 I would also opt for breaking up over the phone as soon as possible. Doing anything else would just be delaying the inevitable and hurt him even more.
madjac74 Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 Well no matter how much you sugar coat it... if this guy is really that into you then you are going to **** on his thanksgiving parade no matter how you tell him. I suggest for your own safety you don't do it in person on a holiday with family and friends. This time of year is stressful enough without dropping a bomb on someone
HeavenOrHell Posted November 18, 2010 Posted November 18, 2010 Break up over the phone as soon as possible, don't let it drag on. Good luck.
eminembnja Posted November 19, 2010 Posted November 19, 2010 Yep, phone. But if it were me, I would also appreciate some in-person closure. Only if he needed it, of course.
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