I am so depressed

[pricillia]

I am so depressed and really ruined my life. The man that I am in a relationship with does not support me emotionally and never makes time for me at all. Tells me that he just does not care about my feelings and if I get upset and start to cry he mocks me and makes fun of me and will not talk to me, I feel foolish.

 

He tells me to go see someone else and that I probably am already. He tells me to get the f*** away from him if we are are disagree or I call him out. I may be a part of the problem however I am not vandictive and do not yell just call him out if he is really crossing the line.

 

He works all of the time and forgot my birthday wished me happy birthday when I reminded him but never got me a card or anything. I do not expect much from him it is really the thought that counts.

 

I have always been there for him no matter what and help him whenever he needs it, the other day he said that I was no different than his ex wife except that she drinks to much and I don't. Sometimes I just want to punch him in the face.

 

I feel super alone and like a fool for opening up my heart. I don't want him to hold my hand just be there for me if I am going through something. Keep in mind I am the calm one and I am the one to always be there for him when something goes wrong

Edited November 17, 2010 by pricillia

[Wilie]

I am so depressed and really ruined my life. The man that I am in a relationship with does not support me emotionally and never makes time for me at all. Tells me that he just does not care about my feelings and if I get upset and start to cry he mocks me and makes fun of me and will not talk to me, I feel foolish.

 

He tells me to go see someone else and that I probably am already. He tells me to get the f*** away from him if we are are disagree or I call him out. I may be a part of the problem however I am not vandictive and do not yell just call him out if he is really crossing the line.

 

He works all of the time and forgot my birthday wished me happy birthday when I reminded him but never got me a card or anything. I do not expect much from him it is really the thought that counts.

 

I have always been there for him no matter what and help him whenever he needs it, the other day he said that I was no different than his ex wife except that she drinks to much and I don't.

 

I feel super alone and like a fool

 

Soooo.. i am no expert, and i just got my a** stomped on by my exwife.. but i gotta say to you.. how long you going to let this go on for? Do you think this is going to stop anytime soon? If not,.. what do YOU plan on doing about it? You know this is wrong, and you deserve to be treated like you treat someone.. soooo.. and trust me.. i spent 4 months trying to get my wife back and dealing with her games... you need to bite the bullet and say F**** O** to this person, take the pain for a few months, feal the fear and just do it.. and think about it, if you stay, your going to feel like you do now for ALONGGGGGGG time..... so .. just do it... and it'll be over in a few months and you will be feeling great..

 

~peace

[chuzzbug]

Pricillia, it sounds like you need a big hug *hug*.

 

Here's the tough part: you're not actually in a relationship. You're in a self-destructive spiral. He is hurting you and you are allowing it, thereby hurting yourself more.

 

You should expect *much* from him, as from any partner.

 

Yes, you are super alone and I feel for you. Please consider leaving this fool and I promise you that eventually you will feel much less alone, even when you are by yourself.

[pricillia]

Thanks,

 

I feel as though I am may be part of the problem but not the cause does that make sense?

[threebyfate]

((hugs)) pricillia.

 

Get some anger in you. Tell him to take his lazy, no good ass for a long hike!

[D-Lish]

Why dedicate your life to someone that repeatedly tells you he's just not that into you? What's the point in doing that? It's a waste of your time.

 

I'm sure you've heard the saying "you teach people how to treat you"- in your case, you're just as responsible because you keep accepting the treatment he dishes out. You're part of the problem because you stay when you are being so obviously disrespected.

 

You can lament all you want and cry "poor me"- or you can learn how to love and respect yourself. Find it in your heart to love yourself and you'll attract much more worthy people into your life. A woman that truly respected herself wouldn't ever put up with this kind of crap from anyone- she most certainly wouldn't hand her heart over to a man like your bf.

 

Leaving a man like this would be a really great first step to liberating yourself.

[pricillia]

((hugs)) pricillia.

 

Get some anger in you. Tell him to take his lazy, no good ass for a long hike!

 

I know when I get angry he tells me that I have an attitude. Sometimes he is so depressed and just wants to be left alone which is fine... I never know when it is coming at all and if I talk to him when he is in that frame of mind he totally blows up like two different people. It is hard for me because we get so close and then he pushes me away.

 

I am so anxious at this point when I am at work I sit at my computer and start to tense up and start to cry silently-we live together.

Edited November 17, 2010 by pricillia

[D-Lish]

I know when I get angry he tells me that I have an attitude. Sometimes he is so depressed and just wants to be left alone which is fine... I never know when it is coming at all and if I talk to him when he is in that frame of mind he totally blows up like two different people. It is hard for me because we get so close and then he pushes me away.

 

I am so anxious at this point when I am at work I sit at my computer and start to tense up and start to cry silently

 

 

So perhaps it's time to do something about your situation! You're stronger than you think.

 

You want respect? You have to respect yourself first. You need to treat yourself with love and affection and refuse to put up with his bad behaviour.

 

What you're doing is refusing to see that you are settling for less in your life. Things could, and should be so much better.

 

We teach others how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves. When a man tells you he doesn't love you and you choose to stay in a relationship with him, you're sending the message that you don't love or respect yourself. It's no surprise he would continue to mistreat you, because in essence, you're indulging this behavior.

 

 

[pricillia]

Your right D-Lish...

 

He tells me that one day he will be gone and will not tell me when, tells me that he did the same thing to his exwife she was not expecting it but he just up and left.

 

I tell him that I wll leave first and he gets angry-I tell him that he turned around and took a good look at himself would he like what he sees... This is crazy I just wish that I could not be in such pain and so sad... I mean in the big scheme of things does it really matter?

Edited November 17, 2010 by pricillia

[chuzzbug]

We are always part of the problem. Either adding to it, or play our role in allowing it to continue.

 

He has engendered a feeling of dependency from you and I understand that it can be very difficult to see your way through the fog: that you deserve better and that he should not be allowed to treat anyone this way.

 

Consider your situation from the outside in, if only for a moment. How would you react if a dear friend told you your own story back?

[mogul]

He's taking you for granted. Leave and watch how quickly everything will change.

[D-Lish]

Your right D-Lish...

 

He tells me that one day he will be gone and will not tell me when, tells me that he did the same thing to his exwife she was not expecting it but he just up and left.

 

I tell him that I wll leave first and he gets angry-I tell him that he turned around and took a good look at himself would he like what he sees... This is crazy I just wish that I could not be in such pain and so sad... I mean in the big scheme of things does it really matter?

 

So stop making excuses P!

 

The guy you're with is treating you like garbage! Why are you okay with that? Being okay with that is a big part of why you are experiencing so much pain.

 

I'm going to say it again, you need to learn how to love yourself enough to leave this guy. You have the emotional tools, don't think you don't- you're stronger than you think girl.

 

The best thing you can ever do for yourself is to

 

1) break off the relationship

2) cease all contact forever.

 

Can you acknowledge the link between his treatment of you, and your acceptance of that treatment?

 

You're never going to be able to reason a guy like this into a healthy relationship- but the more time you spend wasting energy on this guy is lost time working on yourself and finding someone that actually loves you for you.

 

Trust me, walking away from a bad relationship like this is one of the most loving things you could do for yourself. It's liberating to stand up for yourself.

 

You are in control, you can stop the pain, you just have to take the leap.

 

Is staying with someone that makes you feel like garbage better than being alone? Trust me when I say it's not better.

[shayan]

**** this lousy douschebag get out of there priscilla do you have any family you can stay with or friends. You will never be happy with such a cruel and pitiful excuse of a man!