rae573 Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 I started dating this guy I was really attracted to. I had met him 4 years prior when he lived in another state and so when he moved here I was super excited. Our first date was strictly a drinking (no dinner date) and it seemed to go well other than we talked about everything you are not suppose to on a date and at the end of the date after I went home he texted me "He needed me"....which kinda freaked me out. Then our next date we went to see the extremely embarrassing crude movie 'Jackass" after the movie he drove me home with barely any conversation. I started noticing he didn't ask me much about my life/history or background. Then our next date he and I got drunk at a wine festival and I ended up crashing at his place I was fully clothed but he got naked and the next morning there was no cuddling...then our next date we went and had a beer after the beer he didn't suggest going anywhere else so I stupidly invited him over for a glass of wine...He came over and we started kissing on the couch then complained of have 'blue balls' and I really didn't know what to say to that bc I knew I wasn't gonna sleep with the guy or even mess around, so he left abruptly...I called him and he said he had to go and then he asked if i wanted him to come back and i said yes and so he did and the same thing happened again and he left abruptly the second time and then he went home and texted me that he had to go. I haven't heard from him since....I know the sleepover part was way too early in the game and I shouldn't of invited him back so soon.. but nothing other than kissing happened between us so I am really confused. I called him yesterday and left a voicemail apologizing if I offended him in anyway and he only sent me a text back saying no worries. What happened in this situation?? Was he just looking for quick sex?
dispatch3d Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 AVERAGE FRUSTRATED CHUMP is what he is. Just go on more dates if you like him. He's going to take work from your side cause he's just removed from the dating scene.
Str8noChaser Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 None of the 4 outings you described, nor his behavior towards you during these outings, makes it sound like you two were "dating" in the traditional sense that you are looking for, which is why he is sexually frustrated and you are emotionally frustrated. He is not trying to learn more about you or take you to nice places and end things with cuddles, hugging and sweet kisses. You (from his point of view) are not putting out - after 4 times out, twice involving alcohol and private settings. That's what happened in your situation. At this point, it'll be almost impossible to get him to start truly "dating" you.
daphne Posted November 15, 2010 Posted November 15, 2010 rae, You sound young but I gotta be honest with you. Getting drunk on dates and inviting him back are sending him mixed signals. This guy isn't remotely interested in a relationship with you other than sexual. If this isn't what you want, stop sending mixed signals. If you read the obvious signs, he isn't interested in anything but sex. If that's not what you want move on.
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