Questionable1 Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 I just got back from a first date with a guy that I really like. I don't know, I was extremely nervous because I really like him and certainly didn't act like myself for that reason. I clammed up, was shy, and probably very boring. I know, I know....I want to kick myself. Anyway, he said that he had a good time and said that we should hang out again soon and we should think of things to go out and do next time (I think he was just being nice because he's a really nice guy). I don't know...I've heard this all before. It seems like the guys that truly like me make concrete plans for the 2nd date at the end of the first date. I'm just feeling low in confidence and discouraged. I'm ready to write him off. Is it a bad sign?
DellPickle Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 Not at all, I never solidify plans after a date....if Im not interested in seeing a girl again, I'll say, I'll talk to you later or have a good night...if Im interested in another date I will say, we should go out again. A girl may just being saying yes to going out again to avoid the awkwardness of saying no, which I am well aware of as I would do the same so that is why I never make solid plans. So I dont see it as a bad sign....also if he doesnt call or anything tomorrow, dont worry. Just take it as it is and good luck... Also I think most people are aware people can be a little shy on a first date, doesnt mean you cant have fun or leave a positive impression.
Author Questionable1 Posted November 14, 2010 Author Posted November 14, 2010 if Im interested in another date I will say, we should go out again.I've heard the exact same line from multiple guys who never ended up calling. If they don't want to go out with me again, I wish they could only say "Good night." Saying that is polite enough and not awkward. It just gives false hope if they talk about going out again but really aren't interested. Why is that so difficult?
sanskrit Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 Who knows whether he will ask you out again, but most experienced men eventually learn not to ask out for the next date during a date, so not a bad sign IMO.
Tim The Enchanter Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 I've heard the exact same line from multiple guys who never ended up calling. If they don't want to go out with me again, I wish they could only say "Good night." Saying that is polite enough and not awkward. It just gives false hope if they talk about going out again but really aren't interested. Why is that so difficult? I think many people, men and women, are cowards. They'd rather baldfaced lie to someone than actually come out and say "you're a lovely person but.." I've had it from women too. They say things like "I definitely want to see you again" and then the next day I hear they've been dating other guys and I'm like option number two or three in her "list".
zengirl Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 I just got back from a first date with a guy that I really like. I don't know, I was extremely nervous because I really like him and certainly didn't act like myself for that reason. I clammed up, was shy, and probably very boring. I know, I know....I want to kick myself. Anyway, he said that he had a good time and said that we should hang out again soon and we should think of things to go out and do next time (I think he was just being nice because he's a really nice guy). I don't know...I've heard this all before. It seems like the guys that truly like me make concrete plans for the 2nd date at the end of the first date. I'm just feeling low in confidence and discouraged. I'm ready to write him off. Is it a bad sign? You just got back? Not a bad sign at all. My current boyfriend and I ended our first date with me saying, "Call me." And he said "I will." And he did. Plenty of men don't make plans for the next date on the first date----it sounds like he flew up a test balloon and everything; you never know, but I wouldn't write him off yet. Generally, I think most fellows wait a day and then call/text/email for the next date, though some less and some longer. I'd give him 3 days before I even worried about it.
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