genuine84 Posted November 13, 2010 Posted November 13, 2010 Been seeing this girl for about a month now. We get on really well and the conversation flows well. To be honest I try not to get too excited but I kind of know this has some real potential as I have never gotten on so well with a girl before. About a week or so ago, she mentioned that she'd been subject to some pretty average behaviour from previous b/f's and that she wanted to take things slow. I am not the sort of person to force anyone into anything so I respect her wishes. And to be honest, I find it quite refreshing in this day and age. We generally catch up a couple of times each week, usually for a meal as we both work solid hours and have reasonably busy lives, and that has been great. But I sort of find that I am the one organising things. That is not a problem to me as I really enjoy being creative on that front. And obviously given it is the early stages, I feel obliged to be the one driving the dating. I am comfortable that she is not seeing someone else on the side and she has stressed that she is not into playing games, which suits me as neither am I. My question is, does "wants to take her time" really just imply that she sees this going somewhere and really wants to get to know me better and to be comfortable within herself that I am not here for a short term fling (I am actually dating her for the right reasons just for the record), or is she trying to tell me that she doesn't really see this going any further and is giving me an opportunity to exit gracefully? I tend to lean towards the wanting to get to know me better (particularly given how she has been treated in the past), and particularly given she is always keen to catch up for a meal a couple of times each week. Would appreciate people's perspectives on this?
EasyHeart Posted November 13, 2010 Posted November 13, 2010 Emotionally healthy people naturally "take things slowly". It means getting to know someone as a person before jumping into a romantic and sexual relationship. If you have any doubts or questions, why not just ask her what she means? It sounds like you have pretty good communication with her, so just ask her.
dreamingoftigers Posted November 13, 2010 Posted November 13, 2010 Been seeing this girl for about a month now. We get on really well and the conversation flows well. To be honest I try not to get too excited but I kind of know this has some real potential as I have never gotten on so well with a girl before. About a week or so ago, she mentioned that she'd been subject to some pretty average behaviour from previous b/f's and that she wanted to take things slow. I am not the sort of person to force anyone into anything so I respect her wishes. And to be honest, I find it quite refreshing in this day and age. We generally catch up a couple of times each week, usually for a meal as we both work solid hours and have reasonably busy lives, and that has been great. But I sort of find that I am the one organising things. That is not a problem to me as I really enjoy being creative on that front. And obviously given it is the early stages, I feel obliged to be the one driving the dating. I am comfortable that she is not seeing someone else on the side and she has stressed that she is not into playing games, which suits me as neither am I. My question is, does "wants to take her time" really just imply that she sees this going somewhere and really wants to get to know me better and to be comfortable within herself that I am not here for a short term fling (I am actually dating her for the right reasons just for the record), or is she trying to tell me that she doesn't really see this going any further and is giving me an opportunity to exit gracefully? I tend to lean towards the wanting to get to know me better (particularly given how she has been treated in the past), and particularly given she is always keen to catch up for a meal a couple of times each week. Would appreciate people's perspectives on this? I would suggest that it would mean what I bolded above. If a girl is telling you that she wants to take things slow, I would she that she is looking for the LTR and not to show you the door.
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