ReturnToSender Posted November 12, 2010 Posted November 12, 2010 Yeah, Im back in second chances yet again... Things have been super nice between the ex and I after our date, that Im still feeling great about. Hes out of town and has been keeping in touch and very sweet. I went to an event the night he left and sent him a photo of me... and he gushed over it and told me its now his new screensaver. Am I a dolt for being incredibly enamored?! He gets back today and we're going to see each other tonight. The way things are going, Im pretty sure of it that we actually are on the path to recon here. Considering our ridiculously painful breakup and this past year, I dont wanna get ahead of myself and be so eager to be with him again that we end up back in square one. I know we have to take things slow...gotta fight my desire to go full force ahead. As it is, I get butterflies just thinking of when we're officially a couple again...I need to stop and relax! I want to take things slow without saying a catch-all cliche "lets take this slow" I want to be clear about what I want, without rambling on and losing the meaning behind what Im trying to say. Wanna be straight to the point. Any suggestions on a good way to express that to him? And also on keeping my own self under control and not throwing myself at him and this relationship? I really want to do whatever possible so that things go right this time...
lapse Posted November 12, 2010 Posted November 12, 2010 I love that you're his new screensaver. That would be my only advice, to hang back and enjoy the dating and reconnecting part. I think it's important to lose some of the assumptions you have about each other, which may have led to some of the original problems (I'm not sure why you broke up, other than the new chick), and just really enjoy getting to discover each other again. I think that you can show that you're taking it slowly, rather than explain that you're taking it slowly. Perhaps keep your activities in order... keep your schedule on target with the things that you have done in the year without him and don't break those dates you have with yourself and friends. Heh. Easier said than done because of course you want to take every opportunity you can to spend time with him! I guess my point is that showing him that you're taking it slowly is much stronger than telling him so. In fact, saying so may actually reflect some wishful thinking or give him a reason to think that he shouldn't call you when he wants to, etc. It could impose on the natural progression?
tb24 Posted November 12, 2010 Posted November 12, 2010 my ex is my screensaver... of my mind. And it's set to come on every 20 seconds.
alwayshoping Posted November 12, 2010 Posted November 12, 2010 my ex is my screensaver... of my mind. And it's set to come on every 20 seconds. I love this.
Author ReturnToSender Posted November 12, 2010 Author Posted November 12, 2010 Thanks Lapse, I see what youre saying... And yeah, after a year of wanting to be with him, it'll be hard not to do everything to see him whenever possible, but yeah, I still have other things going on, like school, fam, time with friends etc that ive been doing and I dont wanna drop that. It really does feel like a huge deal to be his screensaver cause he really does check his ph every 20 sec LoL! Hes all but surgically attached to his phone, and constantly talking/texting/emailing on it. People joke that even when they see him, they dont...they just see the top of his head. And in practically all the candid pics of him, hes looking at his phone. So in essence...hes now looking at me all day long So yeah, it was also a huge deal that on our date, over the 2hrs that we were together, he only picked up his phone one time to reply to an email one time..and he apologized for having to do that. And then he didnt touch or look at his phone again. I told a friend of mine that, and she asked me if I was sure we were talking about the same guy LoL
Art_Critic Posted November 12, 2010 Posted November 12, 2010 he gushed over it and told me its now his new screensaver. One for the archives.. good line RTS.. just take it slow and don't settle for what you had last time...
Author ReturnToSender Posted November 13, 2010 Author Posted November 13, 2010 One for the archives.. good line RTS.. just take it slow and don't settle for what you had last time... Thanks and yeah Im definitely not in settle mode. I guess Ill just take it easy right now. Until something is established, we dont really have anything for me to be so anxious about. There is a part of me too that feels like I shoudnt stop dating as if Im off the market, so to speak. Putting me on as his screensaver is an incredibly sweet gesture, but its prolly best if Im casual about things with him until/unless theres a commitment to actualy be together
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