qinboxmail Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 (edited) I caught my gf flirting with another guy on yahoo messenger. So I told her about it. She apologized and promise not to do it again. Ever since then I've lost my trust in her. I give her a chance in order for me to trust her again. She has three yahoo nicks. I added two of her nick and another since which I didn't add. I was calling her and she didn't pick up the phone after multiple callings. Then later I went on yahoo and added her "new" nick and found out that she was online with the new nick. I confronted her and she said she just want to sign on and leave it there and not chatting with anyone. She's pissed when I question her. She says she wants privacy. So wth is going on ? I asked her if she's flirting behind me and she said no. So I don't know what to do. Edited November 10, 2010 by qinboxmail
Untouchable_Fire Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I caught my gf flirting with another guy on yahoo messenger. So I told her about it. She apologized and promise not to do it again. Ever since then I've lost my trust in her. I give her a chance in order for me to trust her again. She has three yahoo nicks. I added two of her nick and another since which I didn't add. I was calling her and she didn't pick up the phone after multiple callings. Then later I went on yahoo and added her "new" nick and found out that she was online with the new nick. I confronted her and she said she just want to sign on and leave it there and not chatting with anyone. She's pissed when I question her. She says she wants privacy. So wth is going on ? I asked her if she's flirting behind me and she said no. So I don't know what to do. Typical. You can either dump her or be cheated on. If you dump her you can keep your dignity and move forward. If you choose to stick it out, don't worry she will blame you 100% when she cheats. It will be because your controlling and insecure. It's your call.
Author qinboxmail Posted November 10, 2010 Author Posted November 10, 2010 Typical. You can either dump her or be cheated on. If you dump her you can keep your dignity and move forward. If you choose to stick it out, don't worry she will blame you 100% when she cheats. It will be because your controlling and insecure. It's your call. anyone else ?
betamanlet Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Typical. You can either dump her or be cheated on. If you dump her you can keep your dignity and move forward. If you choose to stick it out, don't worry she will blame you 100% when she cheats. It will be because your controlling and insecure. It's your call. Ouch, so true..
810 Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 anyone else ? you need to work on your insecurity and possible controlling issue. however, it seems like you have the same problem with this girl twice already ...so i ditto with what Untouchable_Fire said.
reservoirdog1 Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I caught my gf flirting with another guy on yahoo messenger. So I told her about it. She apologized and promise not to do it again. Ever since then I've lost my trust in her. I give her a chance in order for me to trust her again. She has three yahoo nicks. I added two of her nick and another since which I didn't add. I was calling her and she didn't pick up the phone after multiple callings. Then later I went on yahoo and added her "new" nick and found out that she was online with the new nick. I confronted her and she said she just want to sign on and leave it there and not chatting with anyone. She's pissed when I question her. She says she wants privacy. So wth is going on ? I asked her if she's flirting behind me and she said no. So I don't know what to do. These are the red flags, as I see them: 1. She gets pissed off when you ask her about these things. Somebody who has nothing to hide will typically stay calm when asked about those things -- why wouldn't they? They're telling the truth, so no reason to get pissy or defensive. Let me guess... when she gets pissed at you for questioning her, does she complain that you "don't trust her"? Or complain that you're "snooping" or "checking up on her"? Those are attempts to turn the tables and make YOU into the wrongdoer in this situation. It's absolutely CLASSIC cheater behaviour. 2. Of course she wants privacy -- she doesn't like you seeing the stuff she's doing behind your back. You've already caught her crossing the line. The clearest indicator here is that she's far more interested in her "privacy" than in allaying your concerns. That should tell you a lot. Again, CLASSIC cheater behaviour. Both of those things indicate that her apology and promises mean precisely dick. You're going to do what you're going to do. If it were me, I'd kick her ass to the curb -- I wouldn't want to be in a relationship where I didn't trust my partner and had very good reasons not to. What's the point? Just remember that we teach people how to treat us. If you stay with her, given her behaviour on this issue, she'll conclude that she can flirt with other guys, probably start screwing them on the side, and you'll thrash about impotently but otherwise let her get away with it. Then she gives you an STD from one of the other guys or gets knocked up, and then you have a far bigger problem to deal with than just her cheating ass. There are better women out there, mang. Go find yourself one of them.
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