collegemommy Posted November 9, 2010 Posted November 9, 2010 I really don't know what it is that I'm looking for as far as answers but I just feel the need to get my feelings out to see if I'm just crazy. A few months ago I was on here because my fiance and I split up for about 6 weeks. Well in May we got back together and things have pretty much been ok since. I found out I was pregnant in August and in September I found out it was twins.... At the same time this was going on, he was in the process of changing jobs. He is a certified EMT and was trying to get into the field so that when he completes the requirements to become a medic, he will already have his foot in the door. Anyway, working as an EMT is a little different than the jobs he was use to. He works long hours and has to have a partner. Just so happens his partner is female and I've seen pictures....she is fairly attractive. And that is where the problem comes in. He hasn't done anything to make me think that there is something going on. I just naturally assume he is attracted to any female that crosses his path. It is literally destroying our relationship because I'm a paranoid mess. If I don't hear from him for hours (cause he is working) I automatically think he is having a good time with her and has forgotten about me. This is all left-over from him cheating on me in the past. I know this and I really don't have any reason to think that he is doing anything with this girl other than my own paranoia.... I don't know how to stop though. How do I make this go away?????
Lauriebell82 Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Well this one is easy, you don't trust him because he was unfaithful to you in the past. He should be understanding about that. That being said, maybe he has changed and has no intentions of cheating on you ever again. Have you sought counseling? That may help to repair some of the trust issues that have occured between you.
Schism Posted November 11, 2010 Posted November 11, 2010 The answer is in you signature line my dear... it's a choice to be fearful so choose to change those sheets. Honestly, you have two choices... to trust him or not. Keep him or not. Love him or not. I came to the realization last year that I was so insecure in my marriage that I was pushing my husband away with the hurt and pain I caused. I realized that if he did have an affair, would I revel in the satisfaction of "being right" or "AHA!!"?? No, I wouldn't. I would relaize that I wasn't fostering a love relationship with my insecurities. So, what's it gonna be?? Love, or fear.
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