counterman Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I think if you do meet a woman that is narcissistic, instead of trying to "aim-up" and go above and beyond to prove that you can meet her "standard", you should just move on. There are plenty of women who aren't like that. I have met girls that have shown traits of inflated ego. In fact, I have been with one. Nothing was ever her fault, she was perfect. It was always me and I didn't deserve to be with her. It's funny how when you do work on yourself and improve, you start to see how deluded some things are. I've had a few of my girl friends describe to me what they expect their dates to be like. It was pretty funny listening to it. One of them even suggested that she would settle for me if she doesn't meet someone like that. Yeah, right. I am in no position to advise them one way or another, but they have never been on dates, they haven't had any guys approach them, so unless something does change, then they'll be alone for a while. I, for one, am not going to wait until for these narcissistic girls to come back down to reality to then be even an option for them.
Woggle Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I think if you do meet a woman that is narcissistic, instead of trying to "aim-up" and go above and beyond to prove that you can meet her "standard", you should just move on. There are plenty of women who aren't like that. I have met girls that have shown traits of inflated ego. In fact, I have been with one. Nothing was ever her fault, she was perfect. It was always me and I didn't deserve to be with her. It's funny how when you do work on yourself and improve, you start to see how deluded some things are. I've had a few of my girl friends describe to me what they expect their dates to be like. It was pretty funny listening to it. One of them even suggested that she would settle for me if she doesn't meet someone like that. Yeah, right. I am in no position to advise them one way or another, but they have never been on dates, they haven't had any guys approach them, so unless something does change, then they'll be alone for a while. I, for one, am not going to wait until for these narcissistic girls to come back down to reality to then be even an option for them. This is how I feel. If you meet somebody like this just move on and seek out better company.
dispatch3d Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 This is how I feel. If you meet somebody like this just move on and seek out better company. indeed we are much too good for these narcisstic people who are much too good for people.
D-Jam Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I have to disagree with the backing off the dating scene and self improvement. Everyone has a right....yes a right... to happiness with another person. If they aren't at the point yet where they can get that, then they should work on achieving it. None of this it's too painfull bs. Learn to deal with your ****. Learn to deal with rejection, you aren't going to frigging die because some girl doesn't like you. You'll even come out a better person. Crawling into your shell and waiting until everyone gets desperate isn't an answer. I didn't really mean to totally give up...but more not make it the top priority too many do. Seen too many men and women with their lives a mess or at a standstill, but they put all their energy into finding someone. When I backed off years ago, I more looked to do other things in my life than just work, have fun on time off, and seek love. I'm all about and for self-improvement. I tell the "nice guys" they need to really self-improve. I just also think rather than get bothered by too much rejection, back off and seek out what else will make you happy in life. I know things changed for me mentally and socially. I went from friendzone material to catching the attention of several attractive women with a lot to offer a guy. I just think it's better to look to make yourself happy in life and to fulfill yourself in life than to hope someone will do that for you.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 This might be slightly off topic, but still related. To be honest, before joining LS, I had virtually no idea how much of a bitch I'm supposed to be. I had no idea that I'm supposed to think I'm the bee's knees just because I am an average-or-above-looking woman under 35. I had no idea that I am supposed to only want to date rich, tall, model-esque men. If anything has given me an inflated ego (which I don't personally think I have, but we'll consider it a mild case), it's POSTS LIKE THIS ON LS. I had NO IDEA women my age and my physical type were supposed to be such snobby, picky, stuck-up princesses. UNTIL I joined LS. Seriously.
denise_xo Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 This might be slightly off topic, but still related. To be honest, before joining LS, I had virtually no idea how much of a bitch I'm supposed to be. I had no idea that I'm supposed to think I'm the bee's knees just because I am an average-or-above-looking woman under 35. I had no idea that I am supposed to only want to date rich, tall, model-esque men. If anything has given me an inflated ego (which I don't personally think I have, but we'll consider it a mild case), it's POSTS LIKE THIS ON LS. I had NO IDEA women my age and my physical type were supposed to be such snobby, picky, stuck-up princesses. UNTIL I joined LS. Seriously. :lmao: I can kind of relate to that. I guess it's because we suffer from some kind of false consciousness and aren't actually aware of our over inflated egos
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 :lmao: I can kind of relate to that. I guess it's because we suffer from some kind of false consciousness and aren't actually aware of our over inflated egos Must be... Before joining I was perfectly content with my 5'10, slightly chubby, low-income but completely hysterical, loving, caring, strong, sexy, and confident boyfriend. Now it appears I must dump him because he simply is not enough, and set out to seek my own personal Brad Pitt, until reaching 30, when I should become desperate in my single-ness and realize the error of my ways. Hmm...I think I'll keep my boyfriend! :]
D-Jam Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I think the underlying point to the article is telling ANYONE who's carrying unrealistic standards that they need to look at themselves as to the "why" they are single. I do agree with any opinion that the article was posted here more as a means to pot-shot women in general, making them all out to be unrealistic thinkers. It's why replies are always about living your life by your rules and doing good for yourself...rather than hope someone will change for you. kiss_andmakeup, you're a pretty girl with apparently realistic standards. I hope your man treats you like a queen.
Woggle Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Must be... Before joining I was perfectly content with my 5'10, slightly chubby, low-income but completely hysterical, loving, caring, strong, sexy, and confident boyfriend. Now it appears I must dump him because he simply is not enough, and set out to seek my own personal Brad Pitt, until reaching 30, when I should become desperate in my single-ness and realize the error of my ways. Hmm...I think I'll keep my boyfriend! :] There are many women who probably think you are settling.
flying Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 (edited) There are many women who probably think you are settling. The part that's really disturbing is that there is a surprising number of guys, at least on LS, that would tell her she must be settling - since she couldn't possibly actually want what she has. The fact that she says she does somehow gets lost or disregarded. I do not understand this. Edited November 10, 2010 by flying Edited for grammar
Woggle Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 The part that's really disturbing is that there is a surprising number of guys, at least on LS, that would tell her she must be settling - since she couldn't possibly actually want what she has. The fact that she says she does somehow gets lost or disregarded. I do not understand this. I do not know her so she might be happy with what she has and good for her if she is but men have seen it too many times. I have seen women talk like that about their men and then the next week some hot player comes along and all of a sudden they are cheating on him and unhappy in their relationship.
flying Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I do not know her so she might be happy with what she has and good for her if she is but men have seen it too many times. I have seen women talk like that about their men and then the next week some hot player comes along and all of a sudden they are cheating on him and unhappy in their relationship. Yeah, well, tell it to my cheating exHusband. Everyone, including me, thought he was such a nice guy. Regardless. I do not think it makes any sense or promotes trust between the sexes when someone comes along and accuses women who actually say openly that they cherish their male partners of being a bunch of liars. Just think about it. What is the actual point of this?
Woggle Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Yeah, well, tell it to my cheating exHusband. Everyone, including me, thought he was such a nice guy. Regardless. I do not think it makes any sense or promotes trust between the sexes when someone comes along and accuses women who actually say openly that they cherish their male partners of being a bunch of liars. Just think about it. What is the actual point of this? Because sadly many are liars or they believe it at the time but will quickly change gears when their emotions shift.
threebyfate Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 So, what's the divisionary line between being realistic and having an over-inflated ego? Would getting what you want in life be any indication or must women always play the stupid false modesty game of putting self down in order to disgustingly solicit compliments? Or must women always be of low self-esteem so unrealistic men get to have a go at them? Mercy dating is such a stupid concept.
flying Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Because sadly many are liars or they believe it at the time but will quickly change gears when their emotions shift. Many people, I assume you mean.
Woggle Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Many people, I assume you mean. Yes many people but men speak from experience.
flying Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Yes many people but men speak from experience. Like I said - so do I. So, I refer you to this thread, which explains it nicely: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t252750/
Woggle Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Like I said - so do I. So, I refer you to this thread, which explains it nicely: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t252750/ This is not true. I have very good instincts and I expect the worst from people until they prove otherwise.
threebyfate Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 This is not true. I have very good instincts and I expect the worst from people until they prove otherwise.That's the nature of your emotional dysfunction. No woman can ever prove anything to you since you'll twist it from positive to negative. Understand that this is a sickness in you. It will eventually erode so badly on your mind that it will destroy you and any woman who comes near you. I pity your wife when you're finally honest with her. She'll be devastated or worse.
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